LIVE: NEWCASTLE & BEGA: Kirsten Drysdale, Scott Ludlum, Gabbi Bolt, Mick Neven, James Pender, Georgina Woods, Dylan Behan, Lewis Hobba and Dan Ilic

🤑 CHIP IN TO OUR PATREON https://www.patreon.com/ARationalFear 📨 SUBSCRIBE TO OUR EMAIL LIST: http://www.arationalfear.com/ 🎟️ GET A TICKET TO OUR MELBOURNE SHOWS — AUGUST 14th 👕 BUY OUR MERCH HERE   G'day Fearmongers — Here is the live recording of this month's two regional shows in climate vulnerable cities — Newcastle and Bega! This is an edited super cut of both shows, if you'd like to see/hear the full unedited shows you can watch the video on our Patreon. Where you can support us for as little as the price of a coffee a month. June 5th — Newcastle Kirsten Drysdale (Reputation Rehab) James Pender (Sammy J) Lewis Hobba (Triple J) Dan Ilic (Can Of Worms) Georgina Woods (Lock The Gate) + DJ Dylabolical (The Chaser / Newsfighters Podcast) June 13th — Bega Mick Neven (Melb. Comedy Festival) Gabbi Bolt (Tik Tok / The Chaser) Lewis Hobba (Triple J) Dan Ilic (Hungry Beast) Scott Ludlam (Former Senator) +DJ Dylabolical (The Chaser / Newsfighters Podcast) Our next live show is on June 24th in Sydney — it is SOLD OUT! So the next show after that is at Comedy Republic in Melbourne August 14th! 🤑 CHIP IN TO OUR PATREON https://www.patreon.com/ARationalFear 📨 SUBSCRIBE TO OUR EMAIL LIST: http://www.arationalfear.com/ 🎟️ GET A TICKET TO OUR MELBOURNE SHOWS — AUGUST 14th 👕 BUY OUR MERCH HERE   Bertha Announcement  0:00   This podcast is supported in part by the birth of foundation. Dan Ilic  0:04   Today Daniel is here the host of irrational fear the podcast you're listening to right now. This is just to let you know that we you're about to hear a mishmash of two of the best live shows we've done this month, we went to Newcastle, and we went to bigger to do shows roughly about climate change in very climate vulnerable areas. And the first show you're gonna hear is our Newcastle show. And let's face it when you're doing a show about climate change in coal country, the audience may require some warming up. You decide. Unknown Speaker  0:32   A rational fear contains naughty words like bricks, Canberra COMM And section audio, or rational view recommends listening by immature audio. Tonight hitting Unknown Speaker  0:45   $1.1 million, the average price of a Newcastle home has hit parity with the average cocaine habit over Newcastle nice. Unknown Speaker  0:54   And Scott Morrison has gotten in trouble for saying our vaccine goal isn't a race, of course a leader of a country that's coming 100 and fifth in the Unknown Speaker  1:01   world would say that. And Newcastle is the seventh biggest city in Australia. And just like camera you have trained now. Dan Ilic  1:12   It's June 5, called Environment Day and live from New causes between nobodies head and the sun to the old genus tower. You're absolutely right, Louis, these people have never heard our show before. All right, welcome. This is the rational V, I'm your host, former gas turbine Daniel ej. And this is the podcast that kind of rips in the news and drills down on climate change. It's a bit like q&a, but people are actually watching, which is right. And tonight we're in Newcastle, which is terrific. On tonight's show. We'll look at lessons learned from the upper hunter byelection. We'll learn how we can carbon offset our partners that work in mining. And we'll ask just how many drinks Do you need to have to pass a bulk up? Let's meet our female guests for tonight. He's the number one comedy video editor as in he's the first and the oldest comedy video editor in Australia from the chaser to nightly and the news fighters podcast. It's still in vain. And he's a part time human rights lawyer and full time clown. He's one of the writers and performers of semi Jays playground politics. It's James panda. And she's recently was the star and executive producer of her own TV show and gave birth halfway through production. She is doing it all for the writings its reputation rehabs, ghosts and draws dial wasn't all true. And she's a self described hypocrite who is on the frontlines of climate action unlock the gate but lock it back up again real quick because it's locked the gates Gina woods and as soon as he started surfing this year, our final guests became the number one radio DJ in Newcastle. I assume you're from Nova Kasserine FM Lewis Hobba  3:15   that's Yeah, no, thank you. I'm thrilled to be here in New Orleans. It's great. Yeah, we found out that the other bit of microphone talking I do the radio show is now the number one drive show in Newcastle. And it was a huge surprise to me, because I have very soft hands. And I just didn't expect to be taken into via violin over Catherine's but I'm fucking thrilled to be here. Yeah. All right. But first, a word from our sponsor. Unknown Speaker  3:38   We understand there's been some confusion about who is eligible for the COVID-19 vaccine and who votes labour. That's why the federal government is clearing up the confusion with job seeker. Job Seeker tells you when the Pfizer COVID-19 vaccine will be made available to groups most in need of protection first, and Liberal Party donors. These vulnerable communities have been identified by medical experts and focus groups. group one includes people who are at increased risk of being silenced by kancil culture, like journalists who haven't asked any questions, cab drivers and divorce dads with an axe to grind on Facebook group to priority access will also be given to people working in critical services such as residents of marginal electorates, sharks fans, coal industry professionals, and men with law degrees who went to university with current or former Liberal Party cabinet members. If you're not listed in groups one or two, keep checking job seeker to see when other groups of people will be eligible for the AstraZeneca vaccine like women's scientists, union members, and Tom Ballard, who will definitely be last on the list job seeker helping those who are more on Team Australia than others get a COVID-19 vaccine first whenever they fucking Arrive authorised by someone anonymously to give us plausible deniability. Should Unknown Speaker  5:03   it all go to hell camera? Dan Ilic  5:05   All right. Sometimes I like to think we're winning the hearts and minds for climate justice in this country. Then I realised Oh, no, no, that's not that feeling. That's not the feeling of hope that's barely um, and the reason why we're here in this room in Newcastle is because it's important because ironically, when it comes to climate justice in Newcastle, you're at the coalface. Yeah. I was waiting for that one. Yep. Now we're gonna be talking a little bit more about the upper hunter election by by election a little later on. Now, the media was saying how labour was distraught to lose the upper hunter seat seat they haven't held in about 100 years. That's like saying, I'm distraught. I'm not an NBA player who can fly. Like labour, we're never going to win because labour forgot to stand for something. Now, the rest of the hunter, of course, is about to be turned into a fracking mess with more pipes coming out of it than Ben cousins. And much like, much like a liberal minister at a camera bar that guest live recovery is going to come upon us whether we want to or not. So I can't. Lewis Hobba  6:19   Honestly, it's quite shocking to me how few of you have heard this podcast. I really like yeah, it's not gonna get better. I really need you to prepare yourself for an hour that Dan Ilic  6:35   did say on the poster, an hour of jokes about the C word. Anyway, Kirsten Drysdale  6:40   I've got to say when I was coming in a lady walk past and she like, pushed her restaurant booking back because she said, I've just walked past the Playhouse and there's a nice play on. I think I'm gonna go and see it. Sorry, lady. Dan Ilic  6:54   Anyway, I think we're losing the battle when it comes to communicating about climate change. And I think we, I think because we're communicating badly. We're up against the carbon lobby when it comes to climate denialism. They have developed one of the most sophisticated weapons ever made boomers on Facebook that print names and put them in local shops. Now, this is the number one threat to climate change everywhere in this country. The environment doesn't stand a chance. On our side, we've had NASA the CSI arrived, David Attenborough and Avatar. And quite frankly, we can't compete with Microsoft Word Art. Look at that. These photos I'm showing you from a recent trip through country New South Wales, for the people on the podcast. This is a Henry Lawson poem about a bushfire and in curly Microsoft Word out above it says someone forgot to tell Henry Lawson in 1911. It was all caused by climate change. And you know what? They're absolutely right, because the first mention of climate change in an Australian newspaper wasn't until 1912 a whole 12 months after in the Sydney Evening News. Now Can anyone guess the number one font for climate deniers in New South Wales? Can anyone guess? Comic Sans Comic Sans very good. Excellent. Very good now Yeah, she's head of the group. Have a look at this one here. This one is a petition to stop a solar farm in both red and blue text, you know, trying to get some labour and liberal voters getting some bipartisanship here. Notice no green text on this one. I thought that was good. All right. Here's another one. This is from an A new farm a gift shop. It says that in 1939 there was a big bushfire that they called Black Friday, which is enough for this person to be convinced that the government was lying to us all about climate change because of bushfire happened once about 100 years ago. Now, the majority of it is in climate change. But as you can see here, they've mixed it up with some Tahoma and some full time use rotten Times New Roman as well, but they have reserved some Comic Sans for some particular words including ignorance and climate counts. Now the author did get a bit biblical towards the end ditching the Comic Sans and instead going for all caps. James is someone who's had some religion in the in their life. Could you please read out the the all caps as the author intended, James Pender  9:19   and yet today we are being told by our leaders that this is the new normal. Unknown Speaker  9:26   This time is right now we have been brainwashed into believing that the gospel of the new religion is cluttered. Georgina Woods  9:36   I have had the opposite experience though Dan of handing out flyers about climate change and saying to people, this is where the water is coming to the water is coming. The water is coming and feeling very much. Dan Ilic  9:46   It's a very biblical down there to build a boat. I love this man. In the bottom it says only this time it has a new and new and dangerous name and a global religion but behind it, the altar has been built, and our gullibility is about to be offered upon it. And then they've gone and undercut their entire argument by putting a Bible quote underneath. We says, none of the wicked shall understand, but the wives shall understand. And I don't understand why finally this The other thing you're gonna see around regional New South Wales here is Alan Jones articles. I call them articles but they actually are pids because you're not allowed to call them journalism because they don't have any facts. And so you're gonna see plenty of this around regional New South Wales. Also, here's another old favourite for people who can squint they put up Dorothea Mackellar has sunburned country as if they will, because there was a flood or a fire once and it was indicted. makellos palm. That's argument enough as to the climate change has always been around. Unknown Speaker  10:51   How come they don't do that thing we all used to do in primary school where you like put a tea bag over the paper and make it look lighter up to the edges. Dan Ilic  10:59   This one looks like the irony is I think this one's been up there. Like through 10 bushfires. It's, it's very faded. So what do we do about it? Well, friends, I've got a couple of things tonight to share with you. I've rewritten Dorothy makellos sunburnt country and and I've printed it out in Comic Sans. And I'm going to read it out to you now. And some of you will be able to take a copy of this home. I love a sunburn country. Not one of constantly ablaze with weather anomalies increasing to our scientists amaze. I love a sunburn country. Oh shit. It's on fire again. We put it out last answer send back the water cry. I love a sunburn country with once in 100 year floods now occurring monthly, we're neck deep in that they're getting bigger and more often these climate change events Sky News can go fuck itself. They're larger and more frequent. Are we corrupt? Like she fuckery County limp leaders need to accelerate just transition rather than holding on to power to boost their superannuation attenuation. So go out and tell your friends that life as we know it is fact unless we ditch our fossil fuels this lucky country's adult. Unknown Speaker  12:14   And there is one more thing I've made for you. And that is, this is like you've moved the end of Oprah to the start. Dan Ilic  12:22   Well, Yo, I gotta get my shit out of the way. I've made a fake op ed, here it is. Look at this. This is a fake Alan Jones op ed. He's basically repenting. Alan Jones  12:34   I'm about to do something that I've only ever done once before. I'm about to admit that I'm wrong. The only other time I've done this is when I declared the chest was the best musical to come out of the brain of Tim Rice. And we all know that's wrong. It's jesus christ superstar incontrovertibly so. The I was wrong about chess as either they have this. Here we go. For a very long time. I used to think that climate change wasn't real. I used to think that like an ethnically 2021 Christmas album, it just wasn't happening. I used to think that the fossil fuel companies and funded my show were on struggle straight and doing it tough. And those on the land were begging for handouts, and so called compensation because their farm is now open pit mine were a bunch of winners who took two sucking off the teat of the working man if I can use that expression. But much like the 2001 Wallabies back end as evolved. And I know this is not to be true. It's wrong. If I could put all of my previous climate change denialism in a chat bag and throw that to say I would, but that's wrong, too. And we get stuck around a dolphin's neck and they die for watch, trying to unravel a bag of bad opinions to shape discourse and policy in an attire for an entire country. One metaphor Dan Ilic  13:44   the revelation came to me when an parlane bow valine chose to go to new direction for marketing and no longer sponsor my TV show. It was in renewable energy giant national solar energy group stepped in with the help of their money, it became clearer than ever that humans were causing climate change. It's clear that we need to stop all additions of alien life and electrify everything with national solar energy grids renewable energy, it's clear we need to draw down emissions as fast as we can. It's also clear that this government needs to prevent me from being such a powerful position to influence policymakers in this country. Instead of paying billions for fossil fuel subsidies that are killing the planet. The Defence department should build a time machine that will allow a cold blooded assassin like that will build been Robert Smith on lightning huge to go back in time and strangle me to death with a big strong athletic hands before I endorse Tony Abbott as prime minister. If we can do that, then we just bought save the planet. And if we can't do that, take an insurance italiaanse in order to protect your home and contents insurance. For the worst his mother died she can throw your wife Allianz peace of mind when Mother Nature is on a period. Mother Nature The only other woman worse than Julia Gilad on Ellen Jones Thanks very much everyone, and you can take a copy of that home with you. If there's any left outside as you leave, but if you register on the website, you'll get a free one as well in next week's email. All right, alright. Ladies and gentlemen dealing rational fear. Fear is rational. Alright. Dylan Behan  15:33   Alright, DJ diabolical se with some wacky clips. Let's get the show on the road. It's great to be here in Newcastle. Now I don't know if any of you heard but there was a thing called a byelection on here recently. Has anyone anyone heard about this? Anyone know about this? Anyone? like hearing about the by election? But actually, I didn't think it was a by election because according to john barilaro, it was actually a horse race when we weren't just in the race. We've led over why like a good bloody racehorse. Unknown Speaker  16:04   Now's not the time to change, change the jockey mid rise. You can't just replace the jockey The horse is broken. Unknown Speaker  16:11   What the hell does that mean? What the hell jumbo? is john barrel IRA just wishing he was at the rice track, instead of on the campaign trail? Or is his brain only capable of holding like a single metaphor and he literally compares everything to a horse race? Like what does he do when he goes to his kids swimming Carnival? Well, Billy may the best horse win. But Dad, I mean, you're human son, not to me. You are. Yes, but if you haven't heard nationals candidate, David lizelle was out on the on the upper Hunter was right. And being the electorate talked on my research. I read that it's the electorate with the highest proportion employed in mining in all of New South Wales, which meant that john barilaro steady state nationals leader made sure to remind us during the campaign, just how much he and his party support call. Unknown Speaker  17:10   The results minister I've actually had more mines approved in the two years since taking on the portfolio. Our track record is supporting coal, a berejiklian barrel era government and liberal National Coalition I'll use the word calling that one thing to say behind Unknown Speaker  17:31   powering your economy. Yes, that is literally a glue a grown man yelling at a coal train like is a four year old total opportunity he just saw Thomas the Tank Engine. Unknown Speaker  17:47   black suit makes me cough ups not that yes, the Nationals love coal. This is the message they wanted us all to take away the Nationals love cold. I love cold so much that being a video editor I put together a little montage of how much the Nationals love and support coal and coal miners into the future let's let's see how much they love. Unknown Speaker  18:11   New South Wales deputy premier john barilaro has called for national referendum or plebiscite on nuclear energy john barrel Laura has long championed the benefits of nuclear power, mining and nuclear energy is should be part of Australia's economic future that low energy future Unknown Speaker  18:27   The only political part of the sickens head up on this issue is the National Party. National senators earlier this year in Canberra drafted legislation allowing the Clean Energy Finance Corporation to invest in nuclear power. And the man who chairs today's nuclear parliamentarian roundtable was the Nationals MP Barnaby Joyce, if you seriously Unknown Speaker  18:48   want zero emissions, if that's what knocks you out. If that's what blows your hair back. Well, then nuclear path is where you're gonna have to go and we should start looking at nuclear. Do you think within 20 years they'll be modular nuclear reactors in Australia? I think it's a very good chance that Unknown Speaker  19:02   it is a cheap, reliable source of energy national parties 100% behind this and we hope our coalition partners will follow us. Unknown Speaker  19:10   Yeah, that coal miners the National Party is 100% behind nuclear. Bobby a good time to go down to the TAFE and learn how to mine uranium if you can find a type that hasn't been sold off at a loss. Yes, that's our deputy federal nationals later Bridget McKenzie there at the end saying how much she loves nuclear. And one of the reasons she said she loves to clutter is it's so much so much better than all those pesky windmills, have a look. Unknown Speaker  19:35   If you put some nuclear power into this mix, we'd be losing a tiny percentage of the landmass that's currently on the wind farms. And we'd be able to use that for farming and a whole lot of other industries as well. Unknown Speaker  19:48   You hear that the deputy leader of the roll party the Nationals, I don't think she's ever seen a shape paddock full of wind turbines before in her entire life. Also, Bridget I don't think you'll I think you'll find sheep crazy is wanting to put nuclear actors out in a backpack or on a rooftop. And also, Matt Canavan, who is in that story is in the montage before he reckons nuclear is really safe to those dangerous renewables. Unknown Speaker  20:13   Overall, nuclear has been an incredibly safe technology. People die installing solar panels on roofs. The greatest energy accidents in the world have always involved petrochemicals which are inherently volatile, and we're talking about getting hydrogen root which is a very flammable and dangerous chemical. Unknown Speaker  20:31   Yeah, last I checked, there's no HBO miniseries about people installing solar panels on roofs. And speaking of hydrogen, which he mentioned there at the end, hydrogen has also been in the news a lot lately, Scott Morrison has made it his new favourite technological buzzword for when he gets cornered by the rest of the world into talking about how we're going to have to get to net zero as you know, eventually, eventually, eventually don't I won't say windows please, please stop asking. In fact, Stormer loves hydrogen so much. He was he was name dropping out repeatedly back in April, in the days around joe biden's virtual climate day summit Have a look. Our ambition is to produce the cheapest green hydrogen in the world, Unknown Speaker  21:14   that one of the most important targets that Australia has, is to be able to produce hydrogen at $2 a kilo. Mr. President in the United States, you have the Silicon Valley. Here in Australia, we are creating our own hydrogen ballots. And when it comes to the hydrogen valleys we can be developing all across the country. Unknown Speaker  21:36   Yes, hydrogen Valley's also the name of the worst timing polar album. So it's comparison is having a bromance with hydrogen. Why? Well, you'll be surprised to learn that it's because our government is arguing that hydrogen made using coal and gas can still be cold clay in hydrogen, aka blue hydrogen, because you know, we'll just use carbon capture to turn it clean, I guess. It's totally a real thing. Carbon Capture works. Change the subject, speaking, speaking in which he is his Angus Taylor, on trying to argue blue hydrogen is clean hydrogen to a friend Kelly on ahran breakfast in April and Well, it sounds like he was going a bit blue in the Unknown Speaker  22:17   face. And you've announced this week. $540 million for new hydrogen hubs and carbon capture and storage at the hydrogen hubs. A lot of people have been asking hear me here on this programme is a green hydrogen or hydrogen made with fossil fuels? Unknown Speaker  22:31   It's clean hydrogen, what's that? That's the point. It's clean hydrogen. Unknown Speaker  22:35   So it's not made by the fossil fuel industry. So I'm not declaring why I'm asking it wasn't made with fossil fuels are made with renewable energy. Unknown Speaker  22:42   The point that may make when they're asking that question is we can't possibly make anything from fossil fuels. Well, you know what, if it's zero emissions, it's fine. That's the point. It's got to be clean. fuels and how do we make it zero emissions? It will be made with anything that allows us to reduce emissions is blue. Hydrogen that can be done with zero emissions is green hydrogen, it can be done with zero emissions. You know, we made a lot of horses in this race. Unknown Speaker  23:10   Horses again, get some new metaphors. Oh my God. That interview was such a cluster shambles. Angus Taylor went on Facebook and commented bad job Angus. Of course, one of the reasons in fact, probably the real reason that Scott Morrison loves hydrogen so much is well it can keep his millionaire mining mate magnate mates rich and we can keep digging up coal for another 50 years. But also it can make trucks got burned. Unknown Speaker  23:38   I mean, hydrogen can be used to drive vehicles. I mean, up there in the Pilbara at the moment. They're putting him in the mining trucks. Yeah, let's Unknown Speaker  23:45   put let's put hydrogen flammable hydrogen in vehicles because it works. So well. Last time, Dan, play the clip. go well. In conclusion, if you're saying well, who cares? We're doing the best we can we can't do any more than to get to zero emissions and help stop climate change in this country. But let's just let's just let's just look over the ditch to New Zealand and see what just didn't return promised at the Earth Day summit back Unknown Speaker  24:16   in April. No fossil fuel subsidies part of New Zealand's four action points one price carbon to make climate related financial disclosures, mandatory three in fossil fuel subsidies and for finance adaptation. Dan Ilic  24:36   And that's how you win a bloody horse race. Yeah. rational. Your fear is rational. It's kind of a theme throughout irrational fear and the greatest moral podcast of our generation where you have all this technical technobabble and it comes down to something so simple, how good is to send data so good, man? Well, yeah. Lewis Hobba  24:58   I want some New Zealand has all those people falling off their solar panelled roofs. Well who'll be laughing then actually eating her words? Yeah. Dan Ilic  25:07   Now, George, you out Newcastle local here. What was the most interesting thing to come out of the upper hunter byelection for you? Unknown Speaker  25:19   Well, I have a slightly different take from Dylan I suppose because there was a lot of you know, headlining about coal. But in actual fact, what the National Party did during that election campaign was cancelled. The coal mine that was proposed and proved on the Liverpool Plains promised they'd never be any open cut coal mining at dark rock near Aberdeen, promised to set up an expert panel that would manage the structural adjustment of the region. You know, in the event of coals, coal exports declined and invite unions and community advocates to take part in deciding how that rolls out. And we won the by election, and then the Labour Party subsequently just tear itself completely to pieces because they didn't think that they were protocol enough during the election campaign. Dan Ilic  26:00   Wow. Did people have the upper hand to think that we're voting for the greens? Unknown Speaker  26:05   Well, I think it's fair to say that if the Labour Party had done the series of things that the National Party did, you know, to curtail the mining industry and plan for structural adjustment. The reaction I think in this sort of tabloid press probably would have been slightly different that they they get a different sort of treatment on it. Lewis Hobba  26:21   So were you a member of lock the gate who would vote national Unknown Speaker  26:26   there are many people in the lock the gate movement who vote nationally in fact, I've spoken to farmers who have you know, locked on against a resource extraction projects who also hand out how to vote cards for the National Party and find it harder find it harder to you know, to change that than they do to go and get arrested fighting mining projects. Lewis Hobba  26:47   Yeah, right. Right. I mean, I guess based on that election Yeah, they're absolutely spot on in situ on the stock mining boat national. That makes complete sense. Dan Ilic  26:57   Ladies and gentlemen, James panda. Hello. Diane Unknown Speaker  27:04   says as Dylan just said, the National hunter byelection and as john Boyle our I said the nationals are back baby, and he's rider guests. But when you've been in power in the upper hand for the last 90 years, it's fair to say you're not only back if you've never gone away, have you to be clean labour last were empowering the upper hunter in 1931. And in 1931, the Labour Party still referred to itself as a Communist Party. Hitler was an unknown artist from Austria. Andrew Boldt hadn't been invented yet so while the loss for labour in the recent byelection as we've already said was a bit unexpected. I've got some ideas to help out labour in the hunter. So I'm going to go through 10 things that can help labour when in the hunter number one way more vests. Nothing says vote for me for 90 consecutive he is like a smart vest. I reckon. JOHN barrel already knows it and that fighter, so I just tie flies. Look at them. This is one PC getting shit done in your electorate. Where is this open neck shirt so you can buy from labour candidate Jeff Drayton says I'm busy appearing before I care. The electorate says no. Number two more jobs brothers are rockin nothing screams success like the John's brothers together they oversaw the most successful era in rugby league Andruw Jones famous for taking so many pictures that became a rugby league and multiple was Matthew Jones is famous for his rich Reagan character who continually called for the game to bring back the beef. I think now labour needs to harness their talents. Imagine Joey Jones on the dealings handing out how to vote cards. going door to door imagine rage Reagan advocating for return to call labour values. Like labour legend Ben chifley in his evocatively titled stump speech, bring back the chief. Perhaps short or long bow there but let's just say John's brothers and labour ladies and gentlemen unstoppable. Number three branch sacking labour needs to get serious about the brand stalking. They can't just keep hoping people will vote for them. They need to start breeding labour voters. Luckily, one thing we do know is that jobs fact the way through Newcastle in the 1990s, which means there's a whole lot of elite illegitimate children out there and given most of the routes probably happened post a 97 Premiership those kids are at voting age. So let's sign them up for Labour baby. Idea number four build a beat something every week Cody in Australia has a big something What does the hunter have other than big unemployment and a big problem with institutional child abuse? to sin if library to when they need to promise to build something big, not that. No, not a gas fired power station. We're in Newcastle. What about a big nuke? Just point the nuclear bomb mccampbell and Mikey demands or using to get rid of Gosford idea number five, get rid of Gosford let's be honest go city's a shithole odroid for anyone to get rid of gossip. I don't care how All I know is do we really need Gosford? The Central Coast Mariners and the bluetongue beanfactory are not reasons to keep a town are the number six sign over kastri and more labour candidates need to be seen saying the word Nova kastri and I don't know how the fuck that means Newcastle person, but it's a cool word. Number seven embrace the ban on a serious note ladies and gentlemen labour needs to embrace the ban on everyone's lips. Okay, and now I don't mean the ban on coal fired power station. I mean the ban on any further albums that involve Daniel Jones and Luke Steele in their co lab drains drains more like nightmares. Am I right? I am right okay. Unknown Speaker  31:00   Adi number nine is a little bit easy. I'm running out of ideas at this point. If Should we get a minister for Semyon if Joe Fitzgibbons can lead the Labour Party to a new generation of glory? We need some less divisive portfolio making them in a surface me on swap the call for a cask of wine, then at least the inner city sir Chardonnay drinkers might actually listen to what he has to say. ID number 10. Ladies and gentlemen, keep doing the same thing later persist with a pro renewable pro climate change platform while failing to sell the benefits of a renewable economy to the workers in the fossil fuel sector. Sure, this strategy is probably not going to work. But the genius of this plan is if they commit to losing long enough sea levels will rise and wipe out the entire hunter region. So that labour can start with the remaining voting population that will probably believe in climate change because they will have seen it wipe out their whole family. And if we're lucky, there'll be some survivors from the descendants of Jeremy jobs and they'll lead the Knights to a Premiership again. Newcastle wins the hunter wins and most importantly, labour winds stickier Dan Ilic  32:14   than other Katherine's on our panel, do any of those inspire you to vote labour Minister for simians great idea? Absolutely. put myself forward. Lewis Hobba  32:25   Yeah, as a as a visitor. What's wrong with Gosford? Yeah, what Dan Ilic  32:30   is wrong with gospel? Really? You've never been? Unknown Speaker  32:35   He has been to coffee if you drive through Gosford that's Unknown Speaker  32:39   it there's a central coast Newcastle thing it's it's you know it's it's a little cousin. Lewis Hobba  32:45   Yeah, I fucking hate him. I'm desperate for calls. I'll say anything. Dan Ilic  32:55   Now Melvin's recent COVID outbreak has meant that a whole bunch of music festivals have been cancelled, including the replacement for the group in the move, fresh produce, which is real shame because music festivals are where some of our biggest and brightest ideas come to light at these festivals. A few years ago, we did a show at splendour in the grass and we asked some punters there just how they would solve the rift between Israel and Palestine. In the results, were pretty interesting. So I'm asking people for solutions to big problems. How do we fix Israel and Palestine Unknown Speaker  33:28   with ketamine? Lots of ketamine. As a matter of fact, I had this discussion. I'm not even fucking joking. Unknown Speaker  33:36   On the motherfucking, with the whole world peace to get the United Nations in a room, a lot of the finest ecstasy in the world will be so all the leftover food that isn't even explained to those people Unknown Speaker  33:52   just get on MDMA and forget to live a democracy. Or what if I told you that Israel had a terrific democratic government? Unknown Speaker  33:59   Well, we all know that's not true because the Ibis group in Washington, what do they call the Ibis group? Dan Ilic  34:07   What's your message to Benjamin Netanyahu? I don't know who he is my friend. What's your message of Benjamin Netanyahu? I'll say get brown chicken. Either one way, I'm sorry. But one of them has to be asking people to solve big problems. So I got a question for you. I've got a really big problem. What is it? Red Bull hurts my heart. told me the softball and a brother of how to be broken but there was also some sort of soul drawn on my lips. Now. How do we fix this? He said that they go for several months. Sorry, he wants Israel and Palestine. The two countries they should have splendid. Rufus just pumping 50k system on the fucking gaza strip out It'd be peace lamanites What's your message to Benjamin Netanyahu? Who's to state they use a two state solution for Israel and Palestine and the five state solution. Benjamin, Prime Minister of Israel, you need to dance under the grace and rule 10 and we will just we will look off the old days when is fully the wrong place us? Lewis Hobba  35:39   Why do you think that is? pretty fucked? Dan Ilic  35:51   I knew we should have opened with Israel gear on Twitter. I'm gonna put that on Twitter, because I'll get cancelled. That's why Yeah, it was on national broadcast that was on SBS at some point and we get so you know, it's on SBS. So no one watch no one you get mobile watching it on Twitter this everyone Kirsten dries down. Unknown Speaker  36:25   Hey, guys, so look, I just want to start by checking in with everyone you know, how's your climate anxiety guys? pretty bad. Yeah. Yeah, it sucks. I get it. But try being may try being married to a coal miner. Well, technically, he's a diesel mechanic. But when I'm not letting my cognitive dissonance get the better of me. I call it what it is. He's a diesel mechanic who works on a coal mine, fixing the machines that dig up the call or maintaining the washing plant that sorts the coal or repairing the pump that stops the tailings dam from spilling over and polluting the surrounding waterways with toxic effluent that's a byproduct of digging up coal. My husband's the latest in a long line of miners that stretches back in his family a dozen generations all the way to Cornwall, which is where coal was invented by Captain Cook. That sounds like a lie. And it partly is. But this here is literally a book tracking my husband's quote, ancient mining family name and heritage as far back as the 1500s. It's a great grade. Although if I had known before we got married just how many murders were in the bloodline. I may have reconsidered this union. Anyway, until not so long ago, this was a perfectly honourable way to make a living, fucking kancil culture. The thing is, we're not idiots. We care about the future. We've got two kids who we love very much. Actually, if I'm being totally honest, we've got one kid we like. The other ones a bit like, take it away. My point is, my husband's job causes our family an increasingly intolerable amount of moral anxiety and makes my efforts to live a carbon neutral lifestyle really quite challenging. Put it this way. A return flight from Sydney to Melbourne puts out about 0.2 metric tonnes of carbon. My husband brings about that much carbon home and coal dust each week. Our sheets look like we've had a threesome with a chimney sweep. When you want to carbon offset a flight you literally just tick a box and pay like $2 for me to carbon offset my husband, I'd have to plant a rainforest, build a wind farm and braid predator and birds here every single day for the rest of my life. Like I sign up to 100% green energy, I ride my bike, I marching rallies, I do Earth Hour, but then my husband goes to work and repairs the overheating torque converter on a D 11. Caterpillar bulldozer and I'm back to square one. What can I do? I love the guy. He's understandably hesitant about quitting his job when we've got a mortgage and two small children to look after. And I'm understandably hesitant about encouraging him to when I'm about to go back to uni because working in the media has hardly made me a reliable breadwinner. Most of my work these days is doing most of my work these days is doing unpaid guest spots on my friend's port. You're getting paid Lewis Hobba  39:22   for this. The applause some of them haven't heard of. Dan Ilic  39:30   I mean, up until yesterday, I thought there's only going to be 40 of you were born. I'm so relieved. Now you're definitely getting paid a profit. Unknown Speaker  39:37   Look, as soon as something comes up that he can jump to he will. In the meantime, I just have to do whatever I can to offset the damage. I've had some success. When we first started dating my husband drove a VA Commodore ute. I was like, dude, I work at the ABC. You can't drop me off in that thing. They'll think it's a terrorist attack. So we traded it in for Much less thirsty VW Golf. Sure it was emasculating to go from driving a high octane petrol Australian musclecar to a diesel German hatchback, but it was worth it knowing the pollution wasn't anywhere near as bad. Unknown Speaker  40:17   Then the Volkswagen emissions cheating scandal broke. And we realised he'd cocked himself for nothing. Well, not for nothing by cover story that I was dating a dental technician from the Central Coast held up a lot longer than it would have otherwise. And look, I've had other ideas. You know, I thought we could set up a GoFundMe page to support him while he re skills. But then I realised it's only socially acceptable to ask your friends for money to fund your overseas holidays, and not to help you leave an industry that's destroying the planet. Okay, then I thought, okay, like pivot pivot. What about sex work? Like for him? Not me. Know, there must be people out there who are into sort smeared. 42 year old men operating heavy machinery, you know, like, no king gets shamed these days. But then his only fans account got shut down because it just looked like he was doing horny blackface. And then I thought, and look, I know this might sound a bit crazy, but just stick with me for a moment. What if the government took some of the money from the massive profits mining companies of my digging up the nation's natural resources, and used it to help retrain the workers in those industries so that ordinary people stuck in these jobs could move on to something new, ideally, something that didn't require them to have chest x rays every two years to screen for black lung, which is not just a joke in Zoo lambda. It's a real thing. But then I remembered we are currently ruled by mouth breathing troglodytes, who would rather return to harvesting whale blubber than admit that maybe just maybe in the year 2021, one of the wealthiest and most highly educated countries in the world could find something a little bit smarter to do than digging up rocks, especially when the mining companies are going to cut and run the moment called becomes economically unviable. Which should be any second now. So anyway, having run out of options, I'm left with no choice, Chris, honey, I love you. But the only way I can truly offset you is to offset you probably shouldn't have ended. But that was the Lewis Hobba  42:39   that was the saddest ending to a comedy bit. Dan Ilic  42:41   I want you to know 23 cents of each ticket is going to go to carbon offsetting. Chris tonight, so thank you for that. Do you have general club? I know that's a facetious pace for this show. But is there a Is there a serious anxiety about about this? Unknown Speaker  42:58   Yeah, absolutely. Like it like everybody gets that kind of moment. Probably every day where you go. Who's gonna end and like for us? It's very, very, very close to home. Yeah, yeah. Lewis Hobba  43:09   I mean, I remember when you started dating your now husband, and you and I were working together in Maharashtra, the IBC. And I remember when you told you like, I was a coal miner. We were all like, oil. Well, well, you were you were a heroin junkie. Yeah, it was fun. Everyone was like, get him to her to a needle room. I'm like, absolutely. Yeah. Dan Ilic  43:36   I mean, I've also been to your house and you've got a lot of nice stuff. So there's like, why am I doing working at ABC? Unknown Speaker  43:44   It's also like yeah, they call it the golden handcuffs because it's you know, it's not like it's a poorly paid job and it but it is hard to jump away from something when you don't have something to jump to like, you know, we're having to take a pay cut, but there's got to be something to go to. Dan Ilic  43:59   Is that what you think about working with ABC? Do you have golden handcuffs are Lewis Hobba  44:03   those plastic handcuffs from a toy shop? They're very cheap. And they're they're actually quite easy to break, zip ties and you all love where you're also like, No, do me. All right, Lee. Dan Ilic  44:17   I won't yuck. Your next guest has been trying to get people to move to a just transition to a Fossil Free future for the last 15 years. So it's safe to say she's a little tired. So please welcome Gina woods. Gina, thank you so much for risking it and coming in sit on a panel of comedians and smart asses to talk about climate justice. It's really wonderful. First of all, you you describe yourself as a hypocrite and a failure. But isn't it in your interest that no one moves from fossil fuels so you can keep your job Unknown Speaker  44:58   It's very true. I have I do think about that. And I, it's, it's a hit, I'm willing to take, it's a sacrifice I'm willing to make go on to the doll queue become unemployed. If we could actually do this, Dan Ilic  45:11   what do you call yourself a hypocrite and a failure? Like, why is that hard to identify every day getting up and look yourself in the mirror? Unknown Speaker  45:19   Well, I guess it's kind of hard, but failure because I have have literally been in, you know, strategy meetings, and you know, this sort of talking to other environmentalists and kind of going, like I've been working on, you know, calling the hunter and climate change for 20 years. Like, that's still a really, really big problem, you know, it hasn't really gotten that far in all that time. So that's, that's why failure and hypocrite is really something that the that kind of ends, you know, of the world like to talk around and environmentalists because we use computers and we, you know, might drive cars and because we are all, you know, entangled in this, it's, it's, you know, we're not on the other side, we're not not part of this society. Kirsten knows it really well, like, and I think this these are so brilliant, really to illustrate that. It's not like an s&m thing, coal miners aren't aliens. People use stuff that uses fossil fuels. And I am one of them. Yeah. Dan Ilic  46:15   Are you going out with a coal miner as well? No, but you know, I'm not ruling it out. Well, tonight, we have a lonely coal miner in the audio come on down. activist once a husband, it's a new TV show. Coming to SBS to you can have full custody of the Doug kit that you guys didn't have that. I'm just an activist standing in front of a coal miner. When we spoke earlier this week, you said I get it. You want me to explain the weirdness in the hunter. When you say that, like what is the weirdness in the hunter? Unknown Speaker  46:53   Well, I mean, I suppose the weirdness really is this sort of exaggerated idea that people have about what it's all about. And it's sort of people from the outside the raging? Go, it's a moonscape, you know, which is kind of puts the nose out of joint to the vignerons and you know, people who kind of, you know, a farmers and tourist industry, because actually, it's very, very beautiful place. It's not a moonscape at all, and it's much Lewis Hobba  47:14   better the Gosford stay down, Gosford, Unknown Speaker  47:19   and you know, there's others who say the mining industry is not important at all, you know, it only employs 2% of people around the country. But in actual fact, that's a really, really large amount of people here who rely on it for their livelihoods. And that's, that's real. And so that's the weirdness is just sort of competing kind of sweeping statements about what it's all about, Dan Ilic  47:37   do you have faith that there's going to be what we all hope for, which is a just transition and a fast transition in the next few years. Unknown Speaker  47:47   I wouldn't describe it as faith. I mean, I'm very excited by some of the stuff going on now part of the 100 jobs Alliance, which is a sort of collaboration of environmentalists and unions to try and just sort of break this taboo of talking about what the region is going to do once the coal export industry declines. And that has really changed things a lot. So I'm excited, rather than kind of hopeful or faithful, I Unknown Speaker  48:09   suppose. Dan Ilic  48:10   When you're going by toe to toe on your, on your battles on the ground? How do you kind of keep an eye on the big picture? Like you're in this podcast, rational fear, we talk to a lot of climate leaders who are all focused on the macro, but you're very much someone who is now in the trenches in the pits for one for a better word, like, how do you kind of keep that eye that vision of the of the major goal whilst you're whilst you're going toe to toe with people here? Unknown Speaker  48:39   I mean, that's pretty tricky. I guess. Like don't, because the big picture is really awful. And you can't really, you know, this is a comedy show. So apologies for bring down the tone. But Lewis Hobba  48:51   Kirsten already talked about a divorce. So we're at rock bottom. Unknown Speaker  48:56   Yeah, I mean, you just have to do what's in front of you. And, you know, I actually try not to read stuff about climate change much anymore, or watch the films and all that stuff. I don't, I don't engage. I just, Dan Ilic  49:05   I just do what's in front of me. There's something to be said for the language that's wrapped around climate change, like, a lot of it is of the station and full of jargon. And but is the reality? Is there a simpler reality behind all of these huge words? Like we've got so many layers of bureaucracy, all talking about climate change, but we're talking about it in this crazy language that you never heard of before? Unknown Speaker  49:34   Yeah, I mean, there is the reality. And I think one of the things that really fucks us up on this is that we've got this sort of really quite primary straightforward problems of rivers drying up and, you know, huge storms and big holes in the ground with no plans to fill them and you know, a huge workforce, very well paid jobs, not quite sure where they're gonna go in 20 years time, but it's all kind of obfuscated and clouded into this sort of language. have, you know the voluntary land mitigation access policy and approved methods for assessing air pollution and an American submission on this new period of public hearing? Yeah, so it's like, my job is like explaining the government to people and trying to sort of bridge that gap to say, well, when they say, you know, strategic release framework, what they mean is, they're going to be putting out new areas for coal exploration, you know, out west, Dan Ilic  50:23   I like it was James said, He's switching off because he negotiated the TPP and has worked in The Hague. Like, now, I've got PTSD. So and how do you cut through that bureaucratic jargon to kind of make a simpler case like there's a simpler, there's a simpler world out there that many of us want to understand want to be part of. So how do you make that case? Unknown Speaker  50:47   Yeah, I mean, I think you always have to bring and this is what I'm saying about the big picture, you have to bring it back to things that people understand and they see right in front of them. And that's why, you know, what matters to people in the hunter is the the pollution in the air and the effect that the industry has on the river and the dislocation of rural villages. And that's really immediately what people are seeing. And that's and that's where their hearts lie. Unknown Speaker  51:09   in researching for this gig actually saw that the sea wall fell over in Newcastle. Is that to do with mining, or is it Dan Ilic  51:18   the same old same? Oh, the Stockton Yeah, dude. Yeah, it's really well, there was a coal mine right on the beach at Stockton. unrelated to the, to the erosion that's happening. Lewis Hobba  51:31   Wow. Breaking News, irrational fear Saturday night. Dan Ilic  51:36   George fuses? Do you have a sense of hope to keep you going? Like, what what drives you to keep working in this space? Unknown Speaker  51:45   Uh, well, I mean, I, there's a lot of people who live with the impacts of mining who I have worked with, you know, for all the time I've been would love the gate, which is eight years or so. And they, you know, they have no choice. They kind of stuck there. And I owe it to them to continue being being there for them, essentially. And, you know, it's, it's, it's really, it's wonderful work. It doesn't. It's very, very rewarding. Lewis Hobba  52:10   That's all I could say, tragically, you probably have a longer career than coal miners. Oh, God. Yeah. Sorry, Kirsten. Sorry. Yeah, that's good. It's actually good news. And we just want to be forced to become unemployed. You know, we don't want to volunteer and come unemployed together. And we'll just solve the whole problem by everybody Unknown Speaker  52:30   becoming unemployed, universal, basic income. Now, I actually wanted to ask George, because I have done a few events with George in Newcastle, and I find you don't want to embarrass you, but I find it incredibly inspiring, but also incredibly intimidating and terrifying. And I would never, ever fuck with you. And like, bit like you would have been involved in some really like heated confrontations at some of the like actions that you've been had? And are you ever scared when people are really in your face? Or do you just like really get off on that? Unknown Speaker  53:04   At protest actions, I don't tend to get scared. No, I kind of get scared before. And then after. And then when you're there. It's just it just all flows like you're just in the moment? And have you ever been in a situation where you've actually felt like you're actually physically in danger? like someone's going to hit you or anything like that? No, I'm now have, I have been in situations where that's happening to somebody very close by. And actually, that was a forest protest. And a very dear friend of mine put his body in the way of the axe that was chopping down the tripod that my friend was sitting at the top of, which was, you know, see what i'm saying, man? It wasn't me. I was just a witness. But um, yeah, I mean, it is, I guess, it's protesting is a way to bring to the surface a lot of these contradictions and challenges and so it doesn't really provide any answers. It's just about questioning. It's just about bringing things right up close with people and going well, is this actually a good idea? Unknown Speaker  54:00   And what about when you're in the room with people, you know, politicians or people from mining companies, you know, really high powered high profile people? Do you ever find yourself intimidated? Do you intimidate them? Unknown Speaker  54:13   I don't know. I might. What am I good. If you want to hear this story, one of my best stories from last year, which was a difficult year for many people was having a stand up argument with Stephen galley, the head of the minerals Council in New South Wales in New South Wales parliament. And it was because he sort of walked casually past man sort of said hello, Georgina, and I just sort of, you know, I don't want to talk to you Is that a thing and and he had to go at me for not being nice to him and and I just lost it. I was gonna say this on tape. This is just for all of you. I was just sort of like, Is this just a job for you like this isn't just a job for me. I'm not just going to clock in and clock off and say, get a Steve you know, great to see you. This is actually life, you know, life affecting stuff for people that I work with, and I can't just put it all aside and, and pretend like I'm just a professional, so not a politician. Dan Ilic  55:12   Well, George, if you ever get stuck, you could probably always just become Chair of Newcastle University. Chancellor, Chancellor. I'm hoping that posts will reopen again quite soon. Everyone Georgina woods. Lewis Hobba  55:41   Try standing up is this it's something that I was just saying to Dan, when we got in here. I've never done comedy up before. Dan Ilic  55:48   really unusual. It's an unusual situation. James James also said that and I maintain it's because you're the two tallest people Lewis Hobba  55:55   look up at anyone. I feel like a small town lawyer out of there. It's always fun to try to pivot out of climate action back into comedy. So stick with me. I want to talk not about the climate, but about the vaccines. Another big topic. All right. Yeah. One more applause Hello. All right. All right. I don't know if you've heard but the COVID vaccine rollout is going very badly. Right now Scott Morrison couldn't organise a syringe on the set of Trainspotting. By the end of March, he planned to have 4 million people vaccinated and they just missed that target by 3.4 million. This week, the government revealed that hadn't vaccinated aged care workers and they didn't even know how many aged care residents had started getting shots as anyone who had been vaccinated just by asking that question, I know more than the government about vaccine rollout. But in times of crisis, I think it's very important to take the government's lead and instead of looking at what we can do, start looking at who we can blame. Let's start with the labour leaders. We all know Dan Andrews is crawling out of his hospital bed at night, throwing away his fake back brace and creeping out to sprinkle COVID under the beds of Melbourne's children. The media are obviously also to blame. Health Minister Greg hunt got very angry at the media for saying that all the people who were nervous about getting the AstraZeneca vaccine could wait until the Pfizer arrived. He said the media were promoting vaccine hesitancy the media were directly quoting Greg hunt. And that really Paul's pissed off Greg hunt, who is a Greg hunt. The government is also very angry at boomers who have developed this vaccine hesitancy for those following at home. Yes, this is the same vaccine hesitancy the government refused to stop Craig Kelly doing. Craig Kelly fans, what the fuck? Are we in silence? Dan Ilic  58:32   Big queuing on Viber? Lewis Hobba  58:35   Oh, interesting. Okay, let's explore that as we go on. Wow, fuck, I didn't say I've never met somebody like Greg Kelly. It's so crazy. But actually, I think that the vaccine hesitancy problem is actually quite easy to fix because boomers stopped trusting vaccines because they believe anything they read on Facebook. So what I have done is I've prepared some Boomer friendly messaging that you can write on your own Facebook wall at any time to make boomers get their second job quicker than their second home. Yeah, that's right. I know what you own. Well, you know what else you gonna take away from me? Come on. Alright, here we go. Here's the things you can write on your Facebook wall to get famous to take the vaccine. Tell them the vaccine doesn't insert a microchip. It inserts an audio book about Graham Kennedy written by Peter fit Simon. A vaccine is just an extra hot coffee. Tell him it's an iPad. Tell him it's a painting by an indigenous artist. Tell him it's a funny tea towel. Tell him the vaccine is a mountain by tell him the vaccine is a low risk family photo. Tell him it's a podcast with Annabel Crabb. Tell them that vaccine would like to hear a story about an old neighbour who recently died. Tell him the vaccine agrees that the two years of high interest rates in the early 90s was the greatest hardship generated ever five. Tell him it's a BBC drama. Tell him it'll make Netflix easy to use. Tell him it's a carport. Tell him it's a second fridge. Tell them it doesn't use American words like diaper and store. It uses Australian words like nappy and shop. Now, we all know that would 100% get the vaccine roll out back on track. Weirdly, that is not the approach our Prime Minister is taking. though. You might have heard this news yesterday. He's calling in the army. Yeah. Yesterday he announced in one of his trademark announcements that the new head of the National Vaccine task force would be Lieutenant General john frewin. If caught I don't know who he is either, but he's a Lieutenant General. Head of the army. If calling in the army to fix his problems, sounds extreme. Keep in mind, Scott Morrison loves to play with his army men. When he was the Minister for border protection. He called in the army to stop the boats. Then once the boat once the army had done that, he made himself a little boat shaped trophy, saying I stopped the boats. I don't know if anyone in the army got a trophy. They may have got a small participation boat. Personally, may I love the idea of getting the military to run a vaccination campaign. It's intimidating but fun. Can never quite get a read on what's going on. defence. Craig Kelly not okay with military on the fence. burners. He came around. Applause we all love. I stick with me try to stick with you if I wasn't begging but thank you. Dan Ilic  1:02:17   Will you be closing with Gosford Lewis Hobba  1:02:21   backless wood carving? So here we go. Now stick with me on this army thing. Okay, because I actually think it's a really good idea, right? I would love to see people's faces. When they look up to see Ben Robert Smith walking through the streets, threatening to kick anyone who won't get the vaccine out the us with a prosthetic leg is caring for some reason. All right. I knew when I asked you to stick with me that I would be losing you and I don't care. Why I stopped with the army. The Air Force involved. I want to say fighter jets dropping syringes into aged care facilities. I want to say retired veterans pull their old rifles out of the closet, toss away their bayonets, a fixer Pfizer and go back on the road john judge will fight the anti vaxxers on the beaches of Byron Bay. We shall defend our island whatever the cost may be, and then we'll blame the cost on Kevin Rudd awesome. Look, I get why Scotty calls up to fans anytime he's on the defensive. People trust the army and they're already on the payroll. But I really think there's another group on the payroll who are being criminally overlooked when it comes to helping the vaccine roll out. These people live in camera in a building paid for by taxpayers. They're getting taxpayer funded training every day. I'm talking about the Australian Institute of Sport. Now. The prime minister said that the vaccine rollout wasn't a race. Well, right now we have hundreds of perfectly trained athletes for an Olympics that probably won't happen. So let's put them to work and make it a race. First of all, no one knows more about experimental drug treatments that test the vaccines on them. They put things in their bodies that would stop our doctors have a locally produced vaccine that prevents COVID and is also untraceable by the anti doping authority. We store them in the call room used to a climatized l winter Olympian. Then we're on to the AI SS gold medal standard vaccine logistics. This is quite a plan. So come on the journey. All right. An Australian weightlifter lifts boxes of vaccines off the shelves then carries them to a javelin thrower, who hurls individual vaccines across the warehouse. 100 metre medley relay team will swim vaccines across the state of Tasmania, while the rest will travel in short shorts of marathon runners as they jump off to remote corners of regional Australia. The syringes passed like a relay baton from the marathon runners to the power walkers if they encounter any anti vaxxers of high jumper will frosty flop over them gracefully. Ah, Rachel Victorian centre will contain PPA from the fencing team, and one Greco Roman wrestler. Their job is to pin down vaccine hesitant burgers while our welterweight boxes strap on latex gloves. And instead of giving a left jab to the face, give an Australian a right jab and using the power of the AI si predicts we can have the nation fully vaccinated by the end of the week. Then all we need is to get Nicky Webster to sing a closing ceremony and get all the athletes back to camera for an athlete village level fuckathon. If Scott Marcy needs any more convincing, I promise when that's all over, and everyone agrees that athletes have done their job perfectly. He can get get a little gold medal that says he did it all himself Dan Ilic  1:06:18   but didn't rush up. big thank you to DJ de la koliko Jay senda gusta Drysdale Georgina was Unknown Speaker  1:06:27   also a big thank you to Isaac ash and then everyone here at the Civic Theatre in New Castle. Big thanks to Ryan mock the Bertha foundation go YouTube token Jacob brown to the tiffin Yaki, Tom Landry Diogenes, Virginia guy by name. Dan Ilic  1:06:41   Until next time, there's always something to be scared of. Good. Hi, Dan Ilic here back again. That was Newcastle. And as you can tell by the end of the show, they were very much on board with what we have to say. And I should let you know if you want any of the things that I was talking about. In my section of the podcast where