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G’day Fearmongers —
It was hot, it was fun, it was full of audio problems.
Nethertheless, here is the podcast of our Adelaide Fringe Festival Show.
The conversation we had with Kyam Maher, the South Australian Attorney General was super inspiring. South Australia is in the process of passing legislation to enshrine their own Indigenous Voice To Parliament, and the Attorney General is one of the folks leading the charge in SA to bring it to fruition.
Big thanks to the great Jacob Round (on the teppanyaki timeline) who took the dogy audio and massaged and mixed this episode so it’s very listenable.
ALSO on the podcast:
📡 Dan Ilic discovers one of our co-hosts has a branding problem.
🚔 Gabbi Bolt finds out just how long it takes to re-train as cop.
🎸 Andrew Hansen doesn’t like his own name.
📉 Alice Fraser has beef with crypto bros.
📺 Dylan Behan mashes up the summer of news you missed.
👑 Lewis Hobba finds someone to perform at the King’s Coronation.
Brisbane ARF show only has 80 seats left!
If you were planning on coming to our World Science Festival show in Brisbane, you better be quick, it’ll sell out. There’s only 80 seats left and with 3 weeks to go, run, don’t walk to get your tickets.
Also if comedy panel shows about science are your thing; I’m also performing in a show called Night Of The Nerds, the night before A Rational Fear. It’s like Spicks and Specs for geeks. You’ll have a good time.
Cheers
Dan
🤑 CHIP IN TO OUR PATREON https://www.patreon.com/ARationalFear
📨 SUBSCRIBE TO OUR EMAIL LIST: http://www.arationalfear.com/
🎟️ BUY TICKETS TO THE A RATIONAL FEAR LIVE SHOW IN MELBOURNE
🎟️ BUY TICKETS TO THE A RATIONAL FEAR LIVE SHOW IN BRISBANE
0:00
This podcast is supported in part by Australian ethical. When I formally introduced the legislation as Minister for Aboriginal Affairs in the upper house, there were so many Aboriginal people there that journalists and my fellow MPs from the chamber couldn't get in to have a seat. It was the proudest day of my working life.
0:17
That is the voice of Kyam Maher. He is the Attorney General of South Australia and he said a whole bunch of other super interesting things. In this episode of irrational fear recorded live at the Adelaide Fringe Festival just last weekend now, please, just a word on the audio. I couldn't actually hear myself very well, because the audio was quite squeaky in the audience. I don't know how or why it sounded that way. I had a weird headset mic, so I changed my axe halfway through, it sounded a lot better. So Jacob round or the teppanyaki timeline has done absolute wonders at polishing the audio we recorded in Adelaide. So please enjoy this episode. And please enjoy the conversation we had with Kai Omar is really good. Also quick note. If you are in Brisbane and Melbourne, we're coming to you live March 26 in Brisbane at the World Science Festival that is selling really well. We've only got about 80 seats left to sell there. And then April 2 in Melbourne at the Comedy Festival. We are we've we're about half sold out there so pick up your tickets to Brisbane and Melbourne. Right now enjoy this episode of irrational fear recorded live at the Adelaide Fringe Festival
1:21
in Burundi natural pork and pokey Oh Mango yellow Qatar curry Yara thumping De Niro pura chi ha mana Yang jeeyar Tacoma tamping the mining Nina Pudney Ghana Yatta Nina button Ipanema pokey Mocha bhandal Tula poro taken the 10 year panda Taberna to Tacoma, Yang Chicana yada, yada yada. Today we are meeting on sacred Ghana land. We pay our respects to all the Ghana that were and all the Ghana that are we pay our respects to all of our elders earthside and beyond and to all First Nations people. On behalf of the ancestors and Guyana people. We welcome you to our country and ask that as you travel these planes. You remember the people that walked here before you the spirit still lives amongst the steel or concrete the roads and the lawns wherever you go you stand on unseeded Aboriginal land, always was always will be.
2:13
Hello, Robbie McGregor here letting you know that this is a podcast recording that as such you as the audience should make as much noise as possible. Specifically, you should laugh and cheer Dan's opening three jokes regardless of the quality. I know I know. I didn't make the rules okay. The following programme contains medium coarse language and traces of nuts. A rational fear recommends listening by immature audiences. Comedians experts sloughing at the world as it burns down around the live from the Adelaide Fringe Festival. This is a rational fear
3:04
jumps as shocked as all around Australia hundreds of equity five gyms collapsed from too many reps. And the return of the s&p 500 has been a success delivering 51 million to the state. Next year South Australia you'll be able to buy a house and sit there and wait till we tell you where you can see the Southern Lights in Adelaide. Now tell the White Horse behind the streets. Live from the Adelaide Fringe Festival. This is a rational rational fear
this is the podcast that takes the news and gives it a little ride on the Oba. I didn't know what an Oban is. Sounds dangerous. That sounds pretty good. Alright, let's make our fear mongers for tonight. First up is a musical Wiz and a showbiz master of showbiz, a man who's no stranger to making people annoyed on television, but it's only apologise once. It's Andrew Hansen. Hello, Andrew. Hello, Andrew, you've annoyed a lot of people on TV. Do you have your advice for the project?
4:19
The project is apologise more often and somebody might start watching again.
4:26
And they've received their second five star review at the Adelaide Fringe Festival but they refuse to let it go to their head. It's the very humble and she asked him to say this The artist formerly known as Gabby bolts. Yes. Gabby congratulations on your great reviews. What keeps you grounded?
4:43
The rocks that I put in my pocket as they walk into the ocean.
4:49
And then the first of two lawyers here on this panel is the satirical miracle that is Alice Rebecca Fraser. Alice, have you ever been on a call Many panels with more than one lawyer.
5:02
I have always been more than one lawyer on the inside. Inside everybody there are two lawyers one wants you to win and one that wants you to fail and they're in constant court battle.
5:12
And he's not only a DJ but a master craftsman of wacky clips from the news fighters podcast and behind the scenes on every TV show in Australia it's still in vain dealing what is the what is the worst comedy show you've ever worked on? No. I want to work again it's a very small and they know the law inside and out. I hope you have your parking tickets ready for review it South Australia's Attorney General chi ma
5:42
good eye and good afternoon, everyone.
5:43
Time for all of us visitors to this land. What is the strangest law in South Australia we need to be aware
5:50
of you can spend two years in jail for pretending to be a clairvoyant. Is that right? Section 40 of the summary Offences Act.
5:59
Just jail everybody who's claiming to be a clairvoyant because you wouldn't claim to be a clairvoyant. If you were a clairvoyant, because you'd see the jail coming.
6:07
You can just imagine the prosecution the judge tells you Are you a clairvoyant or not you want to and you are gonna ask that case dismissed.
6:15
And finally, each Sunday, our guest visits a maternity ward to drain the stem cells from discarded umbilical cords to keep him youthful enough to host Triple J. Dr. It's the radiant Lewis
6:29
Yes. Welcome your
6:30
children. Last time we came to Adelaide, we are done.
6:37
We don't need to talk about the last time I came to Adelaide.
6:39
We left on sour terms. Because, you know, Julie's Amuro booked us for the cabaret festival. And she got a few complaints about the comedy we did there was very anti Adelaide. So I've got some ground rules.
6:50
Okay. There was actually the moment I started my like set. The last time we were in Adelaide, a man stood up and it was this is the cabaret festival, so very different energy to the fringe. He stood up and he was wearing a feather boa and he flicked it around his head and he read. That's not a camera. It was fucking amazing.
7:14
So we've got some ground rules for tonight. So please, no barrel jokes. No wheelie bin jokes, and no human size receptacle jokes in general. Okay, that is that is it. That is it for tonight. And it's great to be here in Adelaide a little later on. We're going to be talking to Kyle about the voice of South Australia. But first here is a message from this week's sponsor.
7:34
Jim Chalmers says if you've got more than $3 million in Super, you'll probably be okay with paying a normal amount of tax but tell that to the renters in your fifth investment property. Jim Chalmers wants to steal money from the super rich to give it to the slightly less super rich, is this the Australia
7:52
we want? So these are confronting numbers.
7:56
Jim Chalmers doesn't want you to enjoy Bollinger on your 66th birthday, who's forcing you to drink DOM pairing yuck. Instead,
8:04
that's going to be a difficult time ahead. Don't
8:06
let labour steal your third first class trip on the Queen Mary to this year away from you.
8:12
It will get tougher before it starts to ease authorised
8:16
by Rich for a second conversation about Super Australia.
8:22
It is great. It's great to be in Adelaide. It's fantastic energy here it feels like like Austin at South by Southwest I've almost been run over by 10 scooters, which is great because it means if someone's paying 20 bucks to go 500 metres the economy is good. It's really good. It's really good. We're gonna get into a bit of SA politics in a bit. But before that yesterday I to promote the show. I was on ABC Radio. Didn't want to hear me on ABC radio with Joe Schilling yesterday. Yeah. Oh, great. Fantastic. Wonderful. Excellent. And
8:48
listener. You're listening. Dan, have
8:50
you seen the ratings for ABC Radio? I don't think anybody sorry, Lewis.
8:55
It's a question. Levine. Lewis Andrew, myself, Dylan, we've all kind of started our careers on ABC, YouTube, Alice and Gabby as well. And like how many we started our careers like 2009 on TV? Yeah. 10 We went to air 2010 Yeah, you've been doing radio for like Triple J national drive.
9:15
i When radio was invented, I was there. I was there the dawn of the very first broadcast and you did Winston Churchill shook my hand and said go and play flume Youngboy and I did.
9:30
Louis you also do TV? You're a bit of a network star on the ABC.
9:33
Sure. Yeah, that's right. When they need a white guy they they see if Charlie pickerings busy. And then they work their way down to will Anderson. And then they make seven or eight more phone calls. And if none of them are available. They check once more and then they call me
9:49
It's so it's kind of interesting to say you know how ABC Radio Adelaide introduced us.
9:53
These 12 minutes to five you're listening to your show. It is ABC Radio, Adelaide. Well Tomorrow at five pm at Vagabond at the Garden of Earthly Delights, you'll get the opportunity to laugh in the face of fear or irrational fear. Dan Ilic has been hosting this podcast since 2012. In our CO hosts with Triple J presenter, Louis Hobbs.
10:16
It was Hobbs. Father, I think you might have a branding issue.
10:22
Julius Silla has shaken my hand looked me in the eye and said my name on more than one occasion.
10:28
It could have been a simple mispronunciation like that. I don't know, Louis, let's see if it was a mistake.
10:35
You'll be co hosting with Lois Hobbs Of course, Triple J presenter but you always have
10:39
low as this is bad. This is terrible. You've got you've got actually an SEO problem, which is search engine optimization. I actually Googled Lewis Hobbs and it came up with a football. This is Microsoft Bing you're also some kind of planetaries That's
10:54
actually me when they gave me my first radio job.
10:58
But when you put it into Duck Duck go this is what comes up we've discovered the Julian Sheila uses the security search engine Duck Duck guy. Don't lose. Don't worry. Like when I heard this, I had to defend your honour. Thank you so much. I needed to speak up.
11:17
Well, Daniel edge. Thank you for joining us. It's good to know that you've finally got to Adelaide and you'll be part of irrational fear tomorrow in the garden. Have a great show. Dan, thanks for coming on.
11:29
Thanks. So that's why I give a big shout out to my co host Lewis Hobbs. He's an absolute legend.
11:34
Thank you, Dan. Danny, and
11:38
all right, Louis.
11:40
Honestly, I was gonna be really fucking nice to Adelaide this time. I wrote a whole thing about how not and you know what, fuck yourself. It's fucking barrel time. Don't
11:52
punish the people for the one you know. You're all one
11:57
person. You're all Julian Silla.
12:01
Lewis. Sorry. Thanks for Thanks. Thanks for that, Louis. I'm sorry about that. Louis isn't the only one with nine complications. Andrew, you've got quite a complicated problem with your name. Oh, look,
12:11
can I complain about my name in the in the form of song day? Yeah, if you don't find kind of spontaneously do this with a backing track? No, my name is Andrew Hanson and you know that comes with a few issues by this I could have been named after Charles the new King. I could have been James or bill or any damn thing that mom told me Andrew and it makes me wince cuz adopt the name of that Prince terrible name, known by any other name. That's what I want to be a blowgun name like brand new or a nutcase name like Barnaby, an ancient name like Jesus or any name since but I got the name of that Prince. Last night even worse, but didn't get a choice. And son is your surname I was told. I shared with a poly from the Ku Klux Klan, and a rock band of eight year olds. Andrew Garfield with Spider Man. Andrew Lloyd Webber's still fiddling with pants to cursed old name, but our moms weren't convinced. So we kept the name of that print. Sadly, it's a hard name to carry. It's even worse than Harry. I got the name of that print name. But if you're planning a baby, then take my hand squat. Don't give him the name of a print
13:57
there is a bit like q&a on crack loses faith, rational fear.
14:06
As we say goodbye to summer. Let's spend a minute to remember the stories we all avoided over summer. Dylan bang you watch too much news for one man. What did we miss? Yeah, thanks, Sandy.
14:17
Did you have a good summer? A great summer. What about everyone? Everyone in Adelaide have a good summer. Yeah, I had a great summer because in Sydney at least was the first summer in about four years. We didn't have raining ash from bushfires. COVID lockdowns are scary new variants, keeping us indoors. But I don't know personally it felt like there was still not quite enough news. I don't know I watched all the news this summer and and edited together and tell me what you think. Tell me if you think tell me if you think there was much good news this summer.
14:49
The rise in interest rates with the promise of wars income is the number one talking point right across the country.
14:55
I'm certainly sorry if people listened to what we'd say the reserve The Bank says more rate risers are coming but the treasurer it seems is not convinced. It remains well that they have the decisions for the future haven't
15:08
yet been taken.
15:09
Angry shoppers are starting to call out examples of hyperinflation on supermarket shelves. With outrage over Cocoa Puffs nearing $10 A box
15:19
right by parking a major shopping centres is now outlawed in South Australia and we are the parties of the Australian working class.
15:27
The Pentagon is tonight tracking a suspected Chinese spy balloon travelling through us skies blue we
15:33
look at it the very famous Australian cattle dog making its taboo.
15:37
It's been a dramatic day on Sydney's northern beaches with several of them forced to close following a shark attack on a dolphin
15:46
which is scary because you've combined clipper with JAWS. The worst combination you can get
15:53
giant sail has had quite the adventure in the Victorian town of Fort Lonsdale. We're gonna go quickly.
16:01
Visa unit in the Perth nightclub
16:03
is banning red shoes labelling them a magnet for misbehaviour. What is the next shape?
16:08
You're gonna have to change and you're gonna have to two games and sci fi superstars Nicole Kidman and Kate Evan and making the most of their time here in Australia. It was a recent trip to a kebab shop that had the Hollywood couple wowing locals.
16:22
How exciting was it
16:23
to have Nicole and Keith in your store and
16:25
most importantly, what are they?
16:26
Is it something that Keith hasn't tried yet that maybe you should give a go
16:29
at any time of the day when it kebab isn't appropriate?
16:33
For the great kebabs for tiny but potentially deadly radioactive capsule that was missing in WA is Outback has been found. In this case. It was a tiny capsule.
16:44
15 years ago Prime Minister Kevin Rudd delivered a national apology,
16:48
the opposition leader apologising for walking out on the apology 15 years ago.
16:53
I apologise
16:54
for my actions, notably absent from the anniversary breakfast this morning, Peter Dutton we don't need a voice we need is
17:02
a powerful earthquake has struck Turkey now known as Turkey.
17:06
ddrescue is in Turkey and Syria are deep into a second night of digging and freezing temperatures as they race to save any survivors of the earthquakes that struck the region more than 24 hours ago. Well, time for one more trip aboard the venga path.
17:27
That's the summer of news. Yeah, thank you, Dylan.
17:30
Let's continue on with hang on a sec. This is where we play a clip. When you guys want to chime in with a joke, just say hang on a sec, and we'll stop the tape. This comes from South Australian Senator Alex antic he is in some big Alex antic fanzine that's really one are really familiar with his antics. I believe that's the name of the Sky news show. Join me on Alex antics. That's what he's plans to do when he retires. So this is him instead of estimates talking to the Department of Home Affairs, about something very serious,
18:02
your opening statement here, which, after the front of me, you made mention of the fact that the department's work extends to dealing with the effects of climate change. Yes. And to better position Australia to deal with the increasing exposure and vulnerabilities to nationally significant crises, including those due to climate change,
18:21
we think I'm gonna say you hope that the next line is going to be? And is it going? Well? How do you reckon it's good? How can we help you do that better?
18:33
Is that comedy? Or is it serious?
18:36
Sounds like the Adelaide advertiser giving a review
18:40
your opening statement? Is that comedy clarity, or is that serious?
18:45
Are you referring to the question that you've asked me? I don't understand. I don't
18:48
know the suggestion that the Department of Home Affairs is somehow prioritising the issue of climate change.
18:56
Sorry, hang on a sec. He really stops to read the words climate change is like a job. Sorry, I'm just seeing this for the very first time. Climate climate change, explain more?
19:09
What is this catastrophic thing that poses massive security risks for our country department of Home Affairs,
19:14
because I know that like we all I assume, look at this and go, Well, this guy is just being he's just being and he's just getting in the way. And he's, this is theoretical, but he's just like slowing this shit down. And he knows he's that. But imagine if he genuinely had just heard about climate change. Like it would be a cause for concern.
19:35
What he's doing is he's doing this weird thing. He's like cosplaying American politicians who are not actually in the room that they're in. They're just constantly trying to get tick tock clips of themselves going viral being like, a climate change. Like it's just that
19:48
that's exactly what he's doing.
19:50
I think Dan, he really wanted to ask about the venga bus, to embarrass to change and as a South Australian, we're sorry.
19:59
Genuinely I know how to respond to a rather oddly put question, you asked me whether it's comedy. It's my job. I don't I don't really understand what you're asking me.
20:07
Well, so you mean to tell me that the Department of Home Affairs is prioritising the effects of climate change?
20:14
I just enjoy the fact that they're going back going back and forth going, is this comedy? Is this a question? Is this comedy? What's the question? What's comedy?
20:21
It's actually their version of who's on first, which actually is classic comedy.
20:26
Is it safe to say that the department has been captured by leftist ideology?
20:32
Oh, hang on to say he's the comedy. Arrived in the form of that question.
20:39
I went to his Twitter page to see just what his deal is, and who he follows. Who do you think Alex? Liberal senator for South Australia follows? Who is the one person that he follows? Somebody already yelled it out. You want to say it all together? 123. That was Trump, I think and yes, hangable any person he follows his Donald Trump I think that's the real company right there.
21:12
Only podcast made entirely by artificial intelligence. Russian Oh,
21:21
please give it up for Alice Fraser.
21:25
Hello, this is about the news that four new charges have been added to Sam Venkman. Freed's criminal indictment bringing the total number of charges to 12. If you don't know Sam Backman freed was a crypto trader, who was the darling of both Silicon Valley the Effective Altruism community and the Harvard whitebread wank stains for being a tussle head shorts wearing compulsive gamer who seemed to have the magic touch with other people's imaginary money. Silicon Valley is obsessed with startup culture, which you could be mistaken for believing is about starting new and exciting businesses when in fact, it's sort of a gold rush of hype and an obsession with getting bought out quickly by a big fish. So you never have to admit that most online companies don't have a business model at all other than selling your attention to the advertisers. This is just about the acquisition of legitimacy via the public investment of venture capitalism. Essentially, you should give me more money because heaps of people are giving me money, but their job is to talk other people into giving them other people's money in order to give it to other people. Sam Backman freed managed to self brand as a scruffy wunderkind while escaping into his 30s in the Bahamas as one of the world's richest men while doing experimental new wave polyamory with his colleagues, which should have been a red flag as to productivity, because who has time to pioneer a new way of running human sex, while also being responsible for billions of dollars, such as society's willingness to let young fuckheads gamble with huge quantities of money. And at one point, somebody told him that he should think about getting a board for his company, and he told them to go fuck themselves, and they still invest it. And this is happening in a country America which makes mothers go back to work six weeks after giving birth six weeks, I don't want to get graphic but you have barely stopped bleeding. And look, I'm not saying it's that bad. In Australia. After I gave birth, I got a government payment to see me through the first 18 weeks postpartum it was about it arrived about 11 months after I gave birth. And in order to get it I needed to fill out about 30 pages of the most intrusive invasive Kafka esque paperwork explicitly designed to make you feel like our filthy leech sucking on the morally superior teat of the benevolent and hard done by government, while also asking those kinds of questions that make you question your ability to read reason or comprehend the English language. What I am saying here is we have not figured out how to attribute value to things when we're giving money to men to spend on imaginary money that only exists because other people believe in it. And we are not paying people enough to make human beings.
23:52
If Elon
23:53
Musk made a human being you'd give him a fucking Nobel Prize. Even from a purely selfish perspective, you know, the first two years of a baby's life are incredibly important to have a personal connection with at least one priority caregiver. Right? And I'm again, from a purely self interested perspective. Who do you want wiping your ass when you are 90 years old? Is it somebody who knows what it feels like to be loved? Yeah, so what we need to do is give parents enough time and money to make the human beings that are going to be the doctors and the nurses and the carers of the future, rather than passing it down the magic money machine. Thank you.
24:38
What is rational fear? It's based in fear, begging the saddest headlines and giving them a little tickle.
24:45
Yummy. Before we hear from the law itself, you actually have been considering other careers before comedy.
24:53
Yeah, I mean, there's not a lot of proof that there's a lot of security in comedy, and it may shock all of you to know By looking at me that I don't have a degree so anyway, so yeah, I did I had a little Google, we're all good information is found. And I am I was sort of looking at, you know, jobs with career growth that I can have longevity in that provide a good mindset and all that you send me that link. You're not gonna want it when I tell you what it was because I kept I kept seeing one really weird thing that kept popping up and that was the police. Yeah, no, I thought surely not. Surely you have to have a criminology degree to join the police force. But if you have one,
25:33
that's just just for kinds benefit. This is the New South Wales Police.
25:37
Right? Yeah, no show. I know it is. So yeah, I'm from the premier state, but it really should say the premier state, but regardless, I Googled how to look. And I was like, surely not, I had to keep going, you know, so I kept looking, I was like, Okay, well, well, what is the bare minimum? You know, what is the one requirement that you need to join the police force, you know, the job where they train you up to have a gun and then say protect everyone, and it's six months. So I thought about it a bit longer. And I thought, what if you applied that level of training to literally any other profession. If you're a cop, you might want to pop out for about two minutes.
26:19
Or just put your gun away. Put that one down.
26:23
Kindergarten teacher would only have up to F. When they look at their curriculum to teach the alphabet. A surgeon would not yet have even touched a surgery. But six months yep, that's all it takes to join the ALS bullies. A lawyer would be juggling four subjects on their feet. When on average, there are 38 subjects to complete. They cannot yet defend object or bargain for replay. But meanwhile, you can make arrests when you're the AWS police seems fair. A retail worker would still have a skerrick of their soul. The West Coast Eagles still would not have scored a single goal. Michelle has not been introduced as child of destiny. You can look up kids when you work for us police. The age of criminal responsibility in this country across the board is 10 when I was 10, I couldn't even spell criminal. Our first time mom is still too busy cooking up a kid. A first time architect is still drawing up the blueprint. Our first time taxidermist is still fucking creepy, but so is the fact that in six months you can join the US police. A politician would have only fucked up 40 times and for every fuck I may they weren't until about 40 lives. A toaster support worker still has not got back to me. But I would not have that problem. If I worked for us police hands off Telstar it's fun Lulla Lulla Lulla, firearms, military complex. III all the people I know that went into that career were annoying at best and horrifying and worst. A lot of driver would still be making them longer. An office worker still has not worked up two weeks in lieu a musical comedian just has this six months yet all it takes to only make arrests and join us
28:38
this is Russian Oh
28:44
Hello, Daniel. It's here just pausing the podcast let you know that podcasts don't pay for themselves, no generous sponsors do and our generous sponsor for this 10 weeks is Australian ethical. They are sponsoring us and we are very grateful. They love money. In fact, they love making you money. That's what they do. And they do it ethically. So they they stay away from things like fossil fuels and they stay away from things like human trafficking weapons, all sorts of baddies drugs, actually, I don't know. Maybe good drugs. Oh, no. I have to look at the portfolio. I haven't looked at what they looked at what they've invested in. Maybe they invested in pharmaceuticals, but certainly not recreational pharmaceuticals sold on the black market. No, they're not putting money into that. So big thank you to Australian ethical. They've been around since 1986. Making money work and doing good things with it, including sponsoring podcasts.
Thank you so much Australian ethical. later on this year, the whole country will vote in a referendum on the indigenous voice to parliament. The listeners outside of South Australia. You may not know this, but just a few days ago, South Australia passed legislation to enshrine its State's own First Nations voice to Parliament. Thanks to this man. He is a proud Aboriginal
man. The first indigenous person to hold the Office of Attorney General it's time, Ma.
Time, congratulations. What an extraordinary treatment. What can you tell us how it felt to pass that legislation?
30:16
So it's passed the upper house of parliament that goes through the lower house, which by definition the government has the numbers in so we will have a fully elected Aboriginal voice to the South Australian Parliament by the end of this month. Wow. Fantastic. When I formally introduced the legislation as Minister for Aboriginal Affairs in the Upper House, the public galleries were absolutely stacked with Aboriginal leaders, people that I've known, respected and been my mentors for decades. There were so many Aboriginal people there that journalists and my fellow MPs from the chamber couldn't get in to have a seat. It was the proudest day of my working life.
30:52
How did you feel like how did you feel like getting that getting that bill passed and the upper house
30:56
just amazing. At the end of my 20 minute speech, introducing the bill, I haven't been there before when people have stood up and clapped. There were tears there a lot of emotion. As I said, it was the proudest day I've had since I've worked anywhere.
31:11
can sue Are you saying that if this incredible, by the way, but I there was one thing that caught my ear there, if you fill up the holes, the politicians can't get in.
31:24
That does create a big incentive for the politicians from the other chamber who wanted to come and watch it. Not find places to go, uh, yeah. You were thinking of a sneaky way to planning an
31:34
insurrection. But it's it's good to have a backup, you know.
31:39
So that's so exciting. I was in Cape Town two weeks ago, and I was talking to some First Nations folks who I'm friends with from Guatemala, about the indigenous voice to Parliament. And I had I happen to have the 270 page final report and I was showing it to them. They said to me, then this gives me chills like this is incredible how many voices to Parliament from indigenous folks are there around the world, you know, there are
32:03
numbered in different ways. Some Scandinavian countries have their own indigenous Parliament's there are reserved seats for Maori people in the New Zealand Parliament. But certainly in the Australian context, what we're doing South Australia will be the first of any ego, state or territory, and we think will be a really good sort of signpost and hopefully allay some fears with the national referendum coming up.
32:23
Yeah. Well. Of course, the lefties in the audience are clapping girl. That's so exciting. Like, this is something that I'm super interested in. You know, Peter Dutton says he doesn't have enough information. Does he not have enough information?
32:43
Yeah, he has plenty of information. As you said, there's a 270 page report. Yeah, he asked 15 questions. We wrote out the answers to all those 16 questions in terms of how our model works.
32:54
Yeah, but did you do it in bold in,
32:57
you know, and it was only 12 font. So probably wasn't, it wasn't good. But at the end of the day that it is really simply boils down to allowing Aboriginal people more of a say, in decisions that affect their lives. It is as simple as that.
33:12
There are three no camps, as far as I can tell, there's like, recognise a better way, which is like the traditional conservative liberal camp, there's advanced Australia, which is the modern batshit crazy camp. And then there's a third camp, the progressive, no vote made up of a lot of grassroots folks. I follow a lot of like, black and First Nation folks on social media. And it seems to be a bit of disk discontent around the voice, there seems to be there's this progressive no vote is is, is they're all behind this progressive no vote for very compelling reasons around sovereignty, and treaty, they want something more, how do you bring those folks to this conversation?
33:52
I have a lot of sympathy for people who want to see treaty want to see it happen, and want to see it happen. Now, it's a couple of centuries overdue in Australia. But my first political involvement was at the end of last century with the referendum to become a republic. And there were splits in the yes vote for the referendum, those who wanted to directly elected president rather than an appointed one. And those the sort of split in those who wanted to see us become Republic, I think caused it to fail. I would hate to see this referendum go down. Because those who want to see more happen split onto the sequencing treaty first or voiceless. I'm very firmly of the view. If this referendum fails, and we don't get a voice treaty won't be seen in our lifetime. It's not a question of your vote voice down and we get treaty quicker, I just don't think that's going to happen. So
34:39
that was what I was going to ask Do you see them as like one and then the other rather than one getting in the way of the other sort of putting people off for a while?
34:47
Absolutely. A lot of the people that I talked to Marcia Langdon and Megan Davis, those who have been heavily involved before and since the Uluru statement from the heart in 2017. I think sensibly look at sequencing that it makes sense have a voice first. And that sort of voice can then help progress, how you then go about truth and treaty. So I think it makes sense the sequencing. But even if you don't agree with that being against voice doesn't mean you're gonna get something else quicker.
35:14
Is there anything in the voice that because I know there was some talk earlier about it actually getting in the way, not just in terms of getting in the way, theoretically of sovereignty? And like, there were people who were really worried that it would be like, no, no, if we get that, then that actually can't happen. Not won't, but can't. Is there anything any truth to that?
35:32
I can give you some pretty strong advice. No.
35:35
Thank you very much. That's all I have to say
35:40
that there are so many things that thrown up, this will become your third chamber of Parliament and now a level of bureaucracy. It won't. What we've got in South Australian what has been proposed federally is an advisory body, it will mean when government makes decisions, they will listen more to the views of Aboriginal Torres Strait Islander people.
35:58
That's it. It's less sexy when you call it an advisory body. It makes the whole things like obviously, everybody feel like this whole country is up in arms. What over an advisory body
36:10
when you sort of distil it like that? It really Yeah. In those simple terms. Yeah. Well, what's the harm? What's the worst thing that can happen? Yeah, Aboriginal voices will be listened to more?
36:21
Well, what I want to know is I think what everyone wants to know which is will the voice be forced to enter every room? Well, John, phantoms your voice and understand it plays as their theme tune?
36:32
I'd like to say yes, but I don't think we can make that happen. We don't know the bagpipe anywhere in Australia for them.
36:41
There's a lot of kinds of things, folks that no, it feels like this has been a real growing movement. And over probably the last 15 years, you see a lot of kind of movement towards recognising Aboriginal people in the Constitution, things like that. We have, you know, something very small. We have tried to buy for a lot of Aboriginal voices. We have an origin of country now podcast. You know, we say every week, you know, sovereignty was never never ceded. We need a treaty. And I'll be honest, when I heard that I stole it off Tom Ballard's podcasts because it sounded really good. But I mean, it. Is it tokenistic to do that? Or is it meaningful to kind of have these things in small ways in products we make? I don't
37:21
think it's at all tokenistic. And I think it would be the overwhelming view of Aboriginal people that it is important to do that. It is the case. Yeah, it is just plain statement of fact, sovereignty was never seen, and you didn't see Aboriginal people a couple 100 years ago, you can have my country, you can ruin my culture, you can take away our kids, you can take our language, yet sovereignty was never seen. It is a basic statement of fact, and I think many Aboriginal people appreciate that recognition
37:46
will climb. Thank you so much for risking your reputation to come on irrational fear. Yes, give him a round of applause. Thank you so much. And just for balance, I think it's important we hear from Peter Dutton. So I've got a clip. And kayam, I might ask your legal advice after this.
38:07
Hi, Peter Dutton here, I'm calling on albeau to provide more information of the indigenous voice to Parliament, but not in the format of a 270 page report, but too much information. And not in the format of a series of one on one consultations for constitutional experts, and the Prime Minister himself. That information is to oral and as you know, I've heard of listening, which is why I refuse to hear members of my own party advocating for a yes position. You could try to make a pamphlet with pictures that move when you pull a little tab, but it'll go straight into the shredder. If a report, briefings, conventions, pamphlets, a decade of development, and even lobbying from my own party won't convince me Peter Dutton, maybe there's another reason that a former Queensland cop is against an indigenous voice to Parliament, but just can't put my finger on it. But if I did, I'd have to vocalise it, then I'd have to sue myself for defamation. And maybe that's the only detail that's missing. Elbow
39:14
authorised by plausible deniability camera. So, attorney general, in your expert opinion, is that sketch defamatory? Can I play that in public?
39:25
Then I would love to have the power to dispense with the laws of defamation for the purpose of this show tonight. But am I afraid? I don't.
39:33
That's very muddled advice. I think we'll just move on. Please give it up for Louis Harbour. A
39:39
rational fear.
39:44
Hello, thank you very much. Remember when you were a kid, and it was your birthday party. And just before it started, you have a flash of worry. What if no one turns up that fear and fortune Suddenly is coming true, not for a child. But for a poor lonely 73 year old man from England. The man's name is King Charles the third. Because on the sixth of May this year, King Charles is getting a little crown place between his mighty years and he's throwing himself a coronation party. And he's asked all the huge musicians to join him. Adele, Ed Sheeran, Elton John, Robbie Williams, the Spice Girls Harry Styles, they've all said no. So at this point, so many people have said no to playing it King Charles has coronation he's going to be thinking about booking sticky fingers this is how dire the situation is this is true right after Robbie Williams had said no. King Charles went ahead and booked the rest of take that the rest of take that take that with no Robbie Williams is like buying a car without the wheels. Like it's technically a car but you don't pay for it. There was a time when being the king of England man you could just cut off the head of anyone who looked at him funny. And now the king in 2023 is reduced to booking take that without Robbie Williams oh well at least now they won't have to hide Prince Andrew and Robbie performs kids unfortunately for Charles the worldwide vibe on the British monarchy is at an all time low. With the effects of colonisation racism, both old and new. And the fact that they just won't do anything about Andrew it's easy to see why Ed Sheeran might not want to stand up and sing I'm in love with your body directly to King Charles it makes sense that Harry Styles said no to King Charles Harry saying no to Charles it's kind of a tradition they're developing over there. But I think then I wasn't a drone. I think we could have just left oh it could have just been like oh yeah. Oh yeah. See he's got a son called Harry he's yeah and we could have grown was unnecessary. Is Julian fucking Silla been told me people is this a fucking let's not cover what's happening again, Lewis? I think obviously the Harry no makes sense. I think the no that really would have hurt King Charles was Elton John. He asked Elton John. Elton John said no. Now obviously, Elton John did be at Diana's big send off. You might remember. The last thing you want to hear about your coronation is it was less fun than your ex wife's funeral.
That one you could have grown to I would have let it grow and happen on that one. Because Elton John, you might remember he rewrote the lyrics to Candle in the Wind for when Diana died. And I think he could easily do that again. Now for King Charles, I think a little something like and it's said it seems to be you lived your life like a man who yells at men and know and how to hold them when you sign and things. What advice he has it Oh, what a triple threat. Very good. Very good so much. I think it's a very bad sign for a leader when musicians hate you. I think like personally, I think Australia should be a republic. And I think it's frankly embarrassing that Australia would ever take orders from a guy who would book take that without Robbie Williams. I do feel a bit sad for Charles because I have party anxiety. It's the worst isn't the worst. Like the conversation, the rest of it, but it's bad. It's bad. It's what I'm saying. And since I know Charles is a huge fan of the podcast, thank you, Charles. Here's some suggestions of people that I think might say yes to playing at his coronation. So the first port of call if I was him would be people who actually love the Royals. Unfortunately, they're all inbred losers too busy to collecting teaspoons to learn to play an instrument. So they're all out. So here's who might actually do it. Oasis. Now. People have been begging the Gallagher Brothers to get back together for years. They hate each other and so they won't do it. But I think Charles could sit those two boys down and put their fight into perspective. Oh, you hate your brother, do ya? How many times did your brother get on Jeffrey Epstein's plane? Zero. Get the fuck out there and play Wonderwall. You If I was to say no, Charles might need to find someone who maybe hasn't read any news in a while. That could be an option if he was trying to find someone who didn't know anything about what's been going on with the royal family. I suggest Enya. Now Enya? This is true. A true fact. This isn't even a joke about Eddie. This is just a true fact. She lives in a castle alone with 12 cats. Like I don't reckon she's read the news. The problem with Enya if I may, is that she is notoriously Irish, which means Charles's family probably murdered some of India's family. Can you imagine actually having to consider that when you are booking entertainment for your party? Has my family killed any of your family? Okay, low vibes far all right. I haven't done it he fucking Christ. All right. Which brings me finally to the only idea that I think might work. Holograms, people have been making artists perform as holograms for over a decade. Now they'll say yes, because they can't say no. You could literally pick anyone you could have Holly hologram Harry Styles hologram Elton John. Hologram Adele, he could even add hologram Robbie
Williams, to real life take
that. And to finish the concert, I think he should resurrect his dead mother, who, floating above Westminster Abbey could finally say she loves him and ask the world to be nice to him. Now. If you think that's not possible, I want you to just Well, as I say close your eyes, but no, keep them open. Because just look at this. Imagine this floating off to Westminster Abbey. Hologram Robbie Williams probably shirtless. He's his pawn with the rest of take that right. And then the Queen's hologram floats up. And I love you so much, Charlie. I hope everyone in the world is being very nice to it's beautiful.
47:09
Lewis Hobbs everyone. Fantastic. That is it for rational fee. Please think Gabby Lewis Dylan Andrew. Attorney General chi Ma? Is that everyone? Yeah. Delia thank big thanks to Ryan Mike's Australian ethical token events. Dane Nathan Yvonne Kathleen Jacob ran on the timeline. Our new patreon supporters Peter Clayton Darren your grab Nick Mueller, Colin Robertson, Tiffany Barreca Aaron Burke and Peter Lawler is back until next week, there's something to be scared of GoodNites by
47:41
rational,
47:43
a pretty fun show from Adelaide A big thank you to Adelaide. What a great town. What a great vibe. Oh my goodness, the town was absolutely popping off. It is such a wonderful place to hang out for a few days. Congratulations on having such a brilliant festival season. Thank you for going out to say everyone it is so cool as an artist to go to Adelaide. Love you. Lots. Thank you so much. Looking forward to being in Brisbane and Melbourne in just under three weeks time. Please head on over to the World Science Festival website to get your tickets for Brisbane and head on over to the Melbourne International Comedy Festival website to get tickets for Melbourne. Alright, cheerio. See you next week.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai
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2013-06-21
