Susan: Good morning Keith. Have you seen the new health and safety rules have been sent to everyone? I think we have to sign something to say we have read then and promise to abide by them. It all seems a bit unnecessary.
Keith: I did see them. In fact, I have already filed them for future reference.
Susan: Really? I thought you were going to complain like you usually do! And as for filing – I didn’t think you even had a filing system in place… wait a second. Keith, you haven’t filed your document; you’ve put it in the waste paper bin.
Keith: Exactly, appropriate filing is absolutely essential.
Susan: Well, even if it is a bit over the top, I do think you ought to at least take a look at the updated requirements Keith.
Keith: [dramatic sighing] OK, but I can’t see what it will say that I don’t already know. Health and Safety is really just common sense.
Later…
Susan: [entering room] Ahh! Why are there hazard signs all around my desk? Keith, do you have anything to do with this? Why are you wearing a helmet?
Keith: Well Susan, I followed your advice and read the Health and Safety document. It was eye-opening. Are you aware of the number of dangers present in your work area?
Susan: I might have known you would take this too literally.
Janet: Hello team. I am afraid that we need to discuss the new risk assessments we have to consider. What has happened to your desk Susan?
Keith: Ah, that was me Janet. I am afraid that Susan’s desk constituted a major risk according to these new rules.
Janet: Really? Which things have you highlighted? Hmm, a personal photo frame with glass. Yes, I suppose that is a risk, it might be best if you took that home Susan. And a coffee cup without a lid could be very dangerous if it had boiling water in it. Maybe you could change to a cup with a lid.
Keith: Or you could only drink chilled drinks. No ice though; that is a choking hazard.
Janet: What else? The chair too? Yes, I can see that now. Whilst this might be a very comfortable chair, I don’t imagine it is the best one for at a desk. We will have to swap it for an upright one.
Keith: Chairs without cushions are recommended in this case.
Susan: Honestly, this is just Keith being silly.
Janet: It might appear that way Susan, but we really can’t be too careful these days.
Keith: ha ha ha, sorry, a bit of a cough there.
Janet: Do you know what Keith? We need to recruit some more Health and Safety officers now, and I must admit that I didn’t even consider you before. It means doing more administrative chores and there are monthly meetings to attend and I didn’t think it would interest you. However, you are clearly passionate about Health and Safety, so I will put your name forward with strong recommendations. Plus, I will leave you in charge of the risk assessments. I am sure you will enjoy doing this far more than Susan.
Keith: But…
Susan: Congratulations Keith. You know what they say: if that cap fits, wear it.