How long does it take to make friends — for someone you meet who's a potential friend, to turn into an actual friend? If you're out of college and not a young adult anymore, you know that it sure feels like it's a process that takes an awfully long time.
Well my guest has actually crunched the numbers on this question and has the numerical figures to answer it. As well as a whole lot of insight into the dynamics of friendship that are harder to quantify. His name is Jeffrey Hall and he's a professor of communication studies who counts friendship among the topics of his research. Today on the show, Jeff explains the three levels of friends that make up the sort of friendship hierarchy, how many hours it takes for someone to move from one level to the next, and why it's hard to accumulate these needed hours as an adult. We also talk about how sheer time isn't the only factor that's needed to transform an acquaintance into a close or best friend, and the other factors that need to be in play as well. We then shift into discussing another element that influences the friendship-making process: the expectations each friend has for friendship. We discuss how expectations for friendship differ according to sex and personality, and what happens when two people have differing expectations for what it means to be friends.
Resources Related to the PodcastRewild Your Life
The Character Traits That Drive Optimal Performance
Being a Man in the Lousy Modern World
College — What It Was, Is, and Should Be
Could Sleeping in Separate Beds Improve Your Relationship?
The Conquering Father Who Made an Empire-Building Son
How Moral Grandstanding Is Ruining Our Public Discourse
What a Man With 60,000 Books Can Teach You About Lifelong Learning and Building Your Home Library
Tips From a Top TED Talker on How to Be Heard
A Futurist's Guide to Building the Life You Want
The Hell-Raising Leader of WWII's Filthy Thirteen
How to Fight Internet-Induced Numbness
Improve Your Productivity With the Power of Deadlines
How Doing a Life Review Can Help Your Understand Your Past, Present, and Future
What's Causing the Male Friendship Recession?
The Curse of the Self
The Strange Science of Sweat
Men Without Chests
Think More Strategically
The Psychology of Effective Weight Loss
Create your
podcast in
minutes
It is Free