How long does it take to make friends — for someone you meet who's a potential friend, to turn into an actual friend? If you're out of college and not a young adult anymore, you know that it sure feels like it's a process that takes an awfully long time.
Well my guest has actually crunched the numbers on this question and has the numerical figures to answer it. As well as a whole lot of insight into the dynamics of friendship that are harder to quantify. His name is Jeffrey Hall and he's a professor of communication studies who counts friendship among the topics of his research. Today on the show, Jeff explains the three levels of friends that make up the sort of friendship hierarchy, how many hours it takes for someone to move from one level to the next, and why it's hard to accumulate these needed hours as an adult. We also talk about how sheer time isn't the only factor that's needed to transform an acquaintance into a close or best friend, and the other factors that need to be in play as well. We then shift into discussing another element that influences the friendship-making process: the expectations each friend has for friendship. We discuss how expectations for friendship differ according to sex and personality, and what happens when two people have differing expectations for what it means to be friends.
Resources Related to the PodcastPatton and the Bulge: Blood, Guts, and Prayer
Embracing the Strive State
The Dude's Guide to Laundry: How to Save Time, Money, and Your Wardrobe
How to Get Better at Anything
Of Strength and Soul — Exploring the Philosophy of Physical Fitness
The No-BS Secrets of Success
How to Eliminate the Two Biggest Sources of Financial Stress
The Secret World of Bare-Knuckle Boxing
Why Your Memory Seems Bad (It’s Not Just Age)
Grid-Down Medicine — A Guide for When Help Is NOT on the Way
Skills Over Pills
The Power of Everyday Rituals to Shape and Enhance Our Lives
Walden on Wheels — A Man, a Debt, and an American Adventure
How to Create a Distraction-Free Phone
Want to Be Happy? Give Yourself Reasons to Admire Yourself
Tips From a Hostage Negotiator on Handling Difficult Conversations
Lessons in Action, Agency, and Purpose From Buying a Ghost Town
Get More Done With the Power of Timeboxing
How to Shift Out of the Midlife Malaise
The 3 Musical Geniuses Behind the Most Popular Jazz Album of All Time
Create your
podcast in
minutes
It is Free