It hasn’t been easy for Ashley Fryer to let go of her faith. For thirty years, she dedicated her life to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. She grew up attending church multiple times a week, and dutifully studied her scriptures. Over the years, she found inconsistencies in church doctrine, and would pile these up on what she calls ‘the shelf’. She’d pile it higher and higher, thinking, “well, I’ll deal with it later.”
For Ashley, her shelf broke on November 5, 2015. On that day, a new LDS church policy leaked. This policy said, among other things, that children of gay parents could not be baptized unless they were eighteen years old, living on their own, and had renounced same sex marriage. It was a controversial policy that members of the church came out for and against. This ran counter to Ashley’s personal beliefs, and she didn’t believe the leadership of the church spoke for God. So she put down her beloved scriptures, unsure what to do with relics of a religion she no longer believed in.
Since then, Ashley has been on a journey of spiritual discovery. She started exploring Wiccan practices, paganism, and her Norse heritage. She found that Hel, the Norse goddess of the underworld, resonated with her. Half beautiful maiden, half rotting corpse, Hel is the keeper of dead things. To Ashley, Hel represents a spirit of radical self acceptance, and new beginnings rising from the ashes. Ashley realized that she knew what to do with her LDS scriptures.
This episode was produced and edited by Ashley’s little sister, Bethany Denton. Additional editing help from Jeff Emtman and Nick White.
Music: The Black Spot
HBM049: Sam's Japan Tapes
HBM048: Barrie's Mental Tempest
HBM047: Peacocks Without Tails
HBM046: Crooked Skirts
HBM045: Deep Stealth Mode (How To Be A Girl)
HBM044: Distant Warfare
Lying in a Stranger's Grave
HBM043: Last Chance To Evacuate Earth
HBM042: Deers
HBM041: Crossing the River, Feeling Watched
Fear of Silence
Forty Monster Bites
HBM040: The Reformation Bible Puritan Baptist Church
HBM039: A Goddamn Missionary
HBM038: Do Crows Mourn Their Dead?
HBM037: Uncertain Death
HBM036: Throw It In The Ocean
HBM035: Spirits of the Past
HBM034: The Grandmother and The Vine Of The Dead
HBM033: What One Does
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