17. Realigning Your Relationships With Lauren Zoeller

In today’s episode of The Coachable Podcast, Lauren Zoeller and I dig into what it takes to have a long lasting and fulfilling relationship. From healing and commitment to exes and intimacy, we figure out what it takes to have the relationship you desire. 

Reclaim Your Voice [3:45]

• “Relationships are truly the greatest gift we’ve ever been given.”
• “Commit to yourself and reclaim your voice.”

Reflect What You Desire [12:10]

• “Your single-ness or discontent in relationships is due to core wounds that haven’t been brought to light and healed.”
• “You are a reflection of what you are attracting into your dating life.”

Take Responsibility For YOU [18:35]

• “The only thing we truly have control over is the way we feel at any given time.”
• “How someone responds to your truth is not your responsibility.”

Our Ex Relationships [24:25]

• “If someone is bashing an ex, it’s showing that they haven’t taken responsibility for the relationship ending and healing that in themselves.”
• “It takes two people for a relationship to not work.”
• “The way you speak about an ex is a reflection of the healing work you’ve done.”

Intimacy and Growth [27:00]

• “After 60-90 days, hormones can settle and you can get to really know someone on an intimate level before sharing the most sacred act of intimacy with someone.”
• “Don’t utilize sexuality as a weapon.”
• “The key to intimacy and deep alignment is vulnerability-being able to speak your voice and be transparent.”

Love Language Connection [35:30]

• “Intimacy is so much more than the act of sex- deep intimacy can’t come without emotional, mental, and spiritual connection.”
• “Open communication and vulnerability creates intimacy.”

Downfalls of Relationships [39:10]

• “The downfall of relationships is people not wanting to have that additional conversation within themselves and also with their partner to say, ‘this is how this makes me feel’.”
• “Another downfall: One person is willing to put in the work and the other person is shutting down.”

Put In The Work For YOU [46:09]

• “There is a right or wrong when it comes to neglect of self-the minute you start to discount yourself and the experiences you’re feeling, you need to separate from the other person. You are NOT responsible for their feelings.”
• “Embody the example, don’t shame your partner into doing the work.”

Commitment vs. Interest [54:03]

• “An aligned partnership has very little to do with what you’re doing and everything to do with who you’re being.”
• “When you’re interested in something, you’ll do it when it’s convenient. When you’re committed to something, you’ll do whatever it takes.”

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