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Girrrl... Can I Ask You Something?

Girrrl... Can I Ask You Something?

Society & Culture:Relationships

Berating women for views: Kevin Samuels - high value man or a snake oil salesman?

Berating women for views: Kevin Samuels - high value man or a snake oil salesman?

2021-10-26
Download Right click and do "save link as"

Recorded Oct 10, 2021

It was my idea to do an episode on Kevin Samuels (KS). While I'm sort of glad I did my research so I could justify my opinion of his platform, I must say it was a horrible experience. I seriously had to apologize to my body for listening to this man's toxic opinions.  I think I'm glad we did this episode, but it didn't end up like I'd thought it would.  I'd first thought I would provide for you all the quotes from the horse's mouth that illustrates that this man has it out for women...because he does. I'd venture to say that women aren't his only target just the one that garners the most attention and nets him the most dividends. Still, he is the mouth piece for men who have felt hurt, disrespected, and ignored by a black woman.  He uses his platform to attack the women who sign up for his abusive assessments... and people can't help but to watch.  Who has never been tempted to watch a street fight on WorldStar Hip Hop, or a gator eating another gator in SC (true and recent story), Gordan Ramsey humiliate a novice chef, or Simon Cowell decimate a want-to-be pop star?  

Our culture is tempted to watch this stuff and I get it. It's provocative. 

It's just that in this case there is a collection of people (some even in my circles) who subscribe to this man's toxic rhetoric, choosing to overlook the abusive and misogynistic foundation of it all. I wanted to be mad, but I instead I ended up feeling mostly disappointed and sad. Sad that they could relate to this platform and sad that they would promote and enthusiastically support this man's method of berating women on air. People I know and care about told me to listen to this platform and honestly expected me to get an "Ah Ha!" moment that made it all ok.  That moment never happened. Instead, I feel wholly justified in my rejection of everything this man holds himself out to be. I have an enlighten understanding of where me and these people see the world and my role (as a woman) in it very differently.  

Have you ever been educated on something that makes you wiser but learning it was painful?  Creating this episode was one of those moments for me.

That said, there is also a side of me that collects receipts. Heck, a few of the Kevsters asked me to collect facts and I did. I just didn't put them all out during the episode's recording.  So, as I conclude this journey, I will include below some of the notes I collected during my research of the KS platform.  For all the facts I collected please view our notes in full at Girrrlpodcast.com

KS offers women a free assessment of their body type, beauty, financial situation, thoughts on what they deserve in terms of romantic relationships and likelihood for getting a "high value man".  He wants you to believe he is helping women look at their list of requirements for a man and make sure those requirements are realistic. KS desires to "help" her set the bar at an appropriate level to match what she brings to the table. What she brings to the table is determined by a ranking system KS utilizes. He commonly asks a woman: How tall are you, What is your dress size, How much do you weigh, How do you rate yourself? He says "Women all think they are 10s" but he's happy to tell them they are far lower on the scale than they think. Self Check: At this point you are either rooting him on or disgusted by his antics?

For many people their first exposure to KS is a clip of him ranking a woman during a video call. He doesn't hesitate to rank her worth/beauty (to him its the same thing): " You are an adjustable 6" or "You are a [insert low number here] at best" or "You are built like a football player." or "You weigh more than men your height."  About rapper Saweetie, KS volunteers,  "I don't think she'll ever be considered beautiful or gorgeous". What motivation sits behind that statement? Is he being helpful....really?

Supporters of KS blame the women for volunteering for the KS assessments. Perhaps they reason that she asked for it or she should have known better.   I have heard KS supporters say that the women who call in are actually not as pretty or deserving as they think they are thus these women need someone to tell them "the truth". That last part is in quotes because I don't accept KS is the truth do you?

" Men built the world we live in" is the baseline of thought for KS. He believes women should show reverence for the men who built the architecture of the world we live in. Thus women should be shamed for not considering the construction worker, for example.

KS says with disgust that "Women don't feel like they should answer to a guy" Are you thinking, what guy? Cause I was. KS asked one woman who said she wanted to be married if she was willing to be subservient/submissive to ALL MEN.  All men? Really KS?

KS says if women want men to provide, then they should be traditional women/wives. His go-to adjectives are: cooperative, submissive, obedient and loyal.  He said girls should practice serving her brothers so the girls will know how to do it when it's time to be that way with their husbands.

On women with high salaries and high education: He said if women are all that, why are 1 in 4 on a psych medication, overweight, and/or the least happy of women in all previous time periods?  If you read that sentence, did no research of your own and  co-signed that statement, Here's your sign - You are a Kevster, not that there is anything wrong with that.

KS speaks contemptuously about women making demands on a man. He says black women act entitled. He says if you look closely, women who claim they are independent are actually still  "getting rescued by men". For example, if she is a single mom then any government assistance she gets is from a man because and I quote " who do you think pays taxes, men". Just men pay taxes?! SHUT THE FRONT DOOR! I know someone holding a kevin sign has an explanation for this, but don't waste your breath explaining it to me. The fact is I'm a lost cause when it comes to the ks perspective. Also fact: I am a woman who pays taxes.

When women start fights with men she calls the cops to defend herself but and I quote "who do you think will show up? The cop is likely a man". 

KS is disturbed because when men don't have it they just have to live without but when women don't have it they always turn to a man to get it for them. Y'all this really gets under his skin and he lashes out his irritations upon the unfortunate women who volunteer to be on his show.

I watched one episode where the woman who called in was pretty by America's standards, she was thin, she made 6 figures and wanted a man who matched her. KS tried to shame her for not considering a man who earned less than $50k. When she suggested that they ask what other people thought he chastised her for trying to take over his show and open the floor of his platform (know your place Sis). He told her, "You might be cute to other people but you are just a female to me".  Read that again, he said "JUST A FEMALE".  

"Men produce en mass. Women consume en mass"

"Women do nothing and act entitled"

"Name 5 women inventors. You can't."

"The movie The Color Purple is bull s#!+ and has had a catastrophic impact on the black community" Too many independent black women i guess.  He  threw in Waiting to Excel and Tyler Perry movies as well.

KS believes that black women have not been held accountable for their choices. He says other groups have had their behaviors examined but not the black woman.

"Women think they own men. Men in other countries don't put up with this mess." Maybe he needs help with a passport. IJS

"Black men have an irrational reverence for their women in this culture" Sis we need to burn our "queen" shirts I guess.

"Men just want women to be nice and cooperative not supermodels but fit and childless. It's not a lot to ask."

He says black men are more racially loyal than black women. I don't even know what he is talking about and I refused to do the research to verify the stats he gave.

"Chivalry is dead because women killed it."

If I man pays for a dinner twice (so on the second date) the woman should have sex with him or pay her half of the bill . She need to pay her "Coochie balance".  His words not mine.

Ok that's a wrap for me. This has been exceedingly exhausting. 

Quotes from us on this Episode

"We are breaking apart this unit by looking at each other in a way like, " You are not doing your part", " You are doing enough", "You are not good enough" ... I don't think, in our environment, we can afford to be so damaging to each other." - Rhumel

"Can we hold each other to the light? Sure, we should, but we should not cause trauma to people in order to do that. Oftentimes I think that is what he does" - Rhumel

"I don't think love and compassion show up that way." -Rhumel

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