Thought Spirals, Perfectionism and Getting Out of Your Own Way in 2020 with Topsie VandenBosch
Do you ever wonder how one moment you can be driving down the road when someone cuts you off in traffic and you have a negative thought that leads to a breakdown? That one negative thought leads to another negative thought, and then another, and another until you're breaking out in a cold sweat and beating your fist against the steering wheel. How were you able to go from "can you believe that guy just cut me off?" to "I feel like no one understands me and I'm going to end up alone for the rest of my life"? This my friends, is called a thought spiral.
On today's episode I discuss Topsie VandenBosch's work as a mental health therapist and mindset coach, why so many of us struggle with negative thoughts and how we can avoid the black hole of the thought spiral.
We also discuss the coaching industry, how our feelings can be misleading us further from the truth, and why the toxic paradigm of perfectionism is a "crock of shit."
Moments:
9:45 - The difference in therapy and coaching
15:45 - Thought spirals and how to avoid them
28:38 - You feelings are NOT the facts
35:53 - Why perfectionism is just an excuse
42:11 - How to get out of your own way in 2020
Quotes:
"I think that perfectionism also can end up being like an excuse for not actually messing up getting messy and just doing the work. I almost feel like it ends up being this safety net. Yeah, you can fall back on "well, it's not good enough to put out into the world so why do it at all?'"
"When the student is ready, the teacher will appear."
"A lot of us are on autopilot on a day to day basis, and we think things and then we feel things and then we do things, but we're not robots and we weren't created to be robots."
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