When Our Partners Just Don't Get it

Why does it feel like I do all the work around here? Why can't my partner take on a little more? Why does a dad get to go on Good Morning America for DOING HIS DAUGHTER'S HAIR TWICE A WEEK?? There is evidence (statistical evidence, not just tears and bloodshed evidence) that having kids reduces marital harmony. And for a woman, the birth of a child often means taking on a second shift while her partner's routine may barely be interrupted. So how can we communicate with our partners to find labor divisions that work for everyone? In this episode, Margaret and Amy discuss: What the science says about relationships post-children Signs that a partnership is operating unsustainably Tips for how to start the conversation about dividing up parenting responsibilities Episodes we mentioned: Making It Work for the Long Haul (with Belinda Luscombe) episode Parenting as a Team episode The Infamous "Husband Crimes" episode Resources mentioned in the episode: What Happens to a Marriage After Having Children? Fighting Constantly After Baby? Read This. 9 Signs That a Relationship Just Can't Be Saved And a bonus from the Husband Crimes archives: Kurt Vonnegut's attempt at gender equity. Special thanks to this month’s sponsors: Beam’s Dream Powder is their sleep-promoting healthy hot cocoa. 99% of people experience better sleep quality when taking Beam Dream! Get $20 off at beamorganics.com/fresh with the code FRESH. Betterhelp online therapy is affordable, confidential, and effective! Give it a try and see if online therapy can help lower your stress. Get 10% off your first month at betterhelp.com/fresh. Daily Harvest delivers delicious harvest bowls, flatbreads, smoothies, and more, all built on organic fruits and vegetables. Go to dailyharvest.com/laughing to get up to $40 off your first box! Firstleaf is a wine club that curates and ships wines that are personalized to your tastes! Get 6 bottles of wine for $29.95, plus free shipping, at tryfirstleaf.com/laughing. Home.Made.Podcast is a terrific new podcast offering stories about the meaning of home in America. Subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts! KiwiCo projects make science, technology, engineering, art, and math super fun. Get 30% off your first month plus FREE shipping on ANY crate line at kiwico.com with code MOTHERHOOD. Ladder helps you find life insurance without the hassle! Answer a few questions online to apply for up to $3 million in term life insurance coverage. Go to ladderlife.com/laughing today to see if you’re instantly approved. Mathnasium is the place for online and in-person math education– whether your kids are a little behind, or need to be further challenged. Get your free consultation at mathnasium.com. Native products keep you feeling and smelling fresh. Get 20% off your first order by going to nativedeo.com/fresh or by using the promo code FRESH. Parade underwear and loungewear are sustainable, size-inclusive, comfortable and fantastic! Go to yourparade.com/laughing and use the code LAUGHING for 20% off your first order. Peloton has a workout for every goal, day, and mood: everything from boxing and dance cardio to yoga and meditation. Visit onepeloton.com to learn more. Prose now makes supplements personally tailored to address your specific cause of hair shedding. Get your free in-depth consultation and 15% off your custom hair supplements at prose.com/laughing. Renzo’s Vitamins “melty vitamins” taste great and give your kids the vitamins they need- without all the sugar of gummies! Go to renzosmagic.com and use the code FRESH to get $5 off. StoryWorth is an online service that helps you and your loved ones connect through sharing stories and memories and preserves them for years to come. Save $10 off your first purchase at storyworth.com/whatfreshhell. Thrive Causemetics beauty and skin care products have clean, skin-loving ingredients– and are truly high-performance. Get 15% off your first order at thrivecausemetics.com/WHATFRESHHELL. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices