1013 - Extraterrestrials of the Donkey Kong Universe

I'm the key figure in an ongoing government charade, the plot to conceal the truth about the existence of extraterrestrials in the Donkey Kong Universe. It's a global conspiracy, actually, with key players in the highest levels of power, that reaches down into the lives of every monkey, bear, and squirrel on this planet. So, of course, no one believes me. I'm an annoyance to my superiors, a joke to my peers. They call me Spooky, Spooky Hyle, who played Donkey Kong Country when he was just a kid and who now chases after little green men with a Pro Controller, shouting to the heavens or to anyone who will listen that the fix is in, that the sky is falling, and when it hits it's gonna be the shit-storm of all time.