Expectations - How You Create Your Own Relationship Disappointment
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Do you often find that your relationships don't live up to your expectations? Expectations are predictions about the future. You are likely to have an idea in your mind about what your relationship should look like, how your partner should behave and how you would feel in a relationship that is going well. Some of these ideas are part of your awareness, others aren't. A lot of your ideas relate to the wishes and dreams that you have. Expectations are born out of the gap between dream and reality.
Disappointment requires careful pre-planning. The more you visualise and expect things to turn out in a particular way, the more likely you are to be disappointed. On the other hand if you never visualise and hope for great things you would not feel motivated at all.
We discuss the balance between having expectations that you should have, that are realistic and those that set you up for likely failure. Expectations tie in to your attachment style.
Expectations in relationships need to be brought out in the open and communicated. If you can clarify what you both want and need from your partner and the relationship overall you are more likely to head off a lot of disappointment.
The Relationship Maze courses:
What is your argument style? Find out in our short quiz.
Struggling with a lot of conflict and arguments in your relationship? Learn about communicating effectively in our Stop Arguing, Start Loving mini course.
Learn everything you always wanted to know about building and maintaining loving relationships in our comprehensive course The Relationship Maze, starting with understanding yourself in relationships to understanding your partner and understanding what makes for a successful relationship.
Contact us for information about individual counselling/psychotherapy, couples therapy, clinical supervision or CPD training.
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Struggling with a lot of conflict and arguments in your relationship? Learn about communicating effectively and addressing common relationship problems in our Stop Arguing, Start Loving mini course.
Learn everything you always wanted to know about building and maintaining loving relationships in our comprehensive course The Relationship Maze, starting with understanding yourself in relationships to understanding your partner and understanding what makes for a successful relationship. We look at common causes of relationship problems and offer solutions. Learn how to address relationship problems and questions without breaking up.
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