107: Infertility has added a new part to me with Amanda McMullen
Amanda McMullen is a teacher, artist, and singer living in Charlotte, North Carolina. Before getting pregnant with her sweet miracle IVF baby, she experienced 4 years of infertility due to stage 4 endometriosis. During this time, she started her art business and ministry, Asher Marie Co., to process her feelings and thoughts about infertility and help those going through a similar experience.
Amanda had no idea that she would not get pregnant, it is instilled in young women to not have sex because you will get pregnant. Over the course of months she became more confused and wondered what was wrong with me. She just believed her body would do what it was supposed to do and over the years that positive mindset and confidence slowly changed. After surgery for endometriosis she tried diet modifications, medicated cycles, 3 IUI's, acupuncture, with no positive pregnancy test. They did not want to do IVF due to the expense, the invasiveness and the possibility of too many fertilized embryos. We only wanted enough embryos that we could use so we would not have to make a decision with any leftovers.
We also talked about the grief she experienced. Her very supportive church community that embodied her through 4 years of infertility struggles. The books she read to help her through the struggle and a very lengthy conversation about extra embryos.
Book suggestions: Dark Clouds, Deep Mercy by Mark Vroegop and Walking with God through Pain and Suffering by Timothy Keller
Encouragement from Amanda: Whether you are going through miscarriage or infertility or any loss experience, you can sometimes feel different. Like I am not the same person and you are not either because you have added this new part of yourself to who you are and it is now part of who you are, it is not all of who you are. Remembering who you are and there is still that innocence, optimism and the hope that is still there. I believe as healing comes you will rise up and take the driver's seat again and when you are going through grief there is this new part of you that needs extra care and tenderness from yourself and from God. For me it's easy to receive care, love and comfort from God and I'm really hard on myself. I look at it like you're so weak or you're so... If you give yourself compassion to receive that comfort from God, then you will be yourself again.
Connect with Amanda on Social Media: @ashermarieco
Connect with Teresa:
EMAIL: teresa.livingaftergrief.com
Facebook https://www.facebook.com/.livingaftergrief/.
Instagram: @livingaftergrief
Website: www.livingaftergrief.com
click and schedule a free complementary time to talk: https://calendly.com/teresa-reiniger/podcast-discovery-call
Create your
podcast in
minutes
It is Free