I'm sick of being told not to give them the satisfaction [Poem]

I'm sick of being told not to give them the satisfaction

as if somehow keeping quiet about the terrible ways I'm treated is some sort of silent victory

I'm tired of pretending that hiding my pain will teach others a lesson

I'm tired of sparing them the guilt and the shame that should fall on their shoulders but instead falls on mine every time I choose to internalize their hate

I'm done being silent

let my voice be hell on their ears as I talk about how many years I've spent hating myself because I was learning the lessons meant for them

the only lessons my silence ever taught them was that I wasn't going to stop them

no more,

 it's time my pain was public

it's time I stopped giving their darkness asylum and denying them the opportunity to see how they hurt me

I pray that it haunts them

when I say they could have killed me with their words if I was just a little weaker

it's time they own their actions

I'm not giving them the satisfaction I'm giving them the sound of the voice they tried to silence with all the words they never should have said.

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