Being Your Authentic Self In All Your Relationships: Amanda Platner-Director of Adult Programs at Emory Autism Center

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Amanda Platner is the Director of Adult Programs at the Emory Autism Center. She is also a clinical psychologist and another AANE certified therapist. During this episode, we talk about the journey autistic individuals may travel as they move forward on being their "authentic selves". We address the conversations that might have never happened, and those that may take place in relationships with professional colleagues, family members and in intimate or romantic relationships. Amanda shares that many of the individuals she works with have moments of revelation and excitement as they receive their autism diagnosis, or begin to self-identify as autistic. However, what follows next may include changes that not everyone is prepared for, or knows how to address. One of the important questions to ask may be "who are the people in my life who are going to be impacted when I am my authentic self?" As many autistic individuals may not be aware that they have been masking throughout their life, communicating their wants, needs, non-negotiables and boundaries, with compassion and respect may help things move smoother on the journey forward.

Amanda also talks about how the neurotypical partner may feel left behind when their autistic partner moves forward on living authentically. She addresses some of the ways in which both partners can work together to maintain and/or create a healthy relationship, both individually and as a couple. Creating and/or maintaining important rituals may be a helpful process. While also understanding that both partners may experience some grief and mourning for the relationship they thought they would have with themselves and their partner. As the relationship moves forward, it is important to remember that some of the core challenges may involve communication difficulties and understanding emotions.

Lastly, we talk about the importance of creating balance in life and in romantic relationships. More specifically we address the value of creating and agreeing on boundaries that can help create balance regarding intense interests.

Whether you are the autistic partner or the neurotypical/non-autistic partner in your relationship, understanding what each of you need to thrive in life and in your romantic relationship will help both partners live an authentic life. Sometimes that life includes maintaining your current relationship and sometimes a change is needed. No matter what path each of us choose, we all deserve to be in relationships where we can thrive.

You can contact Amanda at: amanda.k.platner@emory.edu or call: 404-727-8350

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If you are interested in becoming an AANE certified therapist or coach, or you would like to register for the "Neurology Matters" training available through AANE for couples or individuals in neurodiverse relationships, you can register at: aane.thinkific.com. Please use the code NeurodiverseLove25 to get 25% off the registration fee. To learn more about AANE, or to find an AANE certified therapist or coach in your area, please click here and look at the map halfway down the page.

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