#43 I'm a Man and I Just Realized I was Rαped

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I'm a man and I just realized I was r%^ed.

It's 4 am. I just woke from a dream that I was upset about my ex even though we broke up 7 years ago. I still sometimes get angry because she was physically abusive. Anyways, in the dream, I talked to my mom about it, and she told me the reason I was upset was because Diana was r#$ing me. And I woke up so quickly because then it clicked.

She used to hit me most if I didn't have s#x with her. She would cry, yell at me, and hit me until my "no" became a "yes." And it happened all the time. I've told people it was an abusive relationship before, I just never connected the dots. What she did was r*pe. And I think if I were a woman, I would have connected the dots sooner because someone would have picked up on it right away. But most people don't think of a man being r@^ed and might be more dismissive of subtler things.

But it's true. I'm lying in bed next to my wife and I'm saying it here, and I'm saying it out loud: I was r*&%d.