#209 - The Tattoos of Davey Dabs

In case you didn’t know, Davey Dabs has a stomach tattoo.

The tattoo is a realistic portrait of an actual stomach. The stomach is that of his deceased grandmother. And although he was not a witness to the autopsy of his beloved grandma Dombrowski from his mother’s polish side of the family, he did bring a Ouija board to place next to the foot pedal, knowing that the artist rendering this organ would channel her spirit for accuracy. 

The artist, Kenny Ink, was a team player through and through, never complaining or taking deep, impatient breaths during the meticulous process. He’d done several of Davey Dabs’ earlier tattoos, including the golden arches of Macdonald’s across the left side of the neck. His ability to apply precision while maintaining a steady hand is his most excellent skill, highly tested in this one particular instance due to the rise and fall of Davey Dabs’ belly between intervals of his beckoning of his beloved Babusia.

Could he capture an actual resemblance to the late matriarch’s stomach? We will never know, but there’s no denying that the image is strikingly lifelike. It’s the detailed depiction of creases and wrinkles that give it an uncanny resemblance.

“Trust your gut,” Davey Dabs instructed the uncertain tattooist.

Kenny Ink smirked, slightly anxious.

Kenny Ink also did his tattoo of Tattoo, the short and stout Mexican character from the 1970’s television show called Fantasy Island. This tattoo is on the left shoulder. Directly underneath the arm, on the upper rib cage, is a tattoo of a heating pad. The reason is that Tattoo will not get cold, having spent his entire life in tropical climates.

By the way, Davey Dabs has seen every episode of Fantasy Island on Hulu. He is also addicted to Gilligan’s Island.

He always looks for crops in the jungle scenes.