174. Bustin' Myths: Porn Helps Me

Welcome to episode #174! This week, Matt and Braden are bustin' one more myth: Porn Helps Me.

Porn Isolates You

When there is sin in our lives, the enemy pulls us into isolation and darkness. When you look at porn, it creates shame. Shame takes on a label and we start to believe that about ourselves. We don’t want to be exposed. It teaches you to lie and be deceitful. It will stunt us in our relationships, and will cause us to move away from community. It moves us into isolation. There is safety in having a multitude of counsellors. Having people call you out and pray for you, and talk to you will help you realize how not-normal and isolated you can get. 

Porn is a supernormal stimulus and messes with your emotions.

It causes a reaction in us that is far greater than something natural. It causes our neuro-receptors to light up in such powerful ways. When we watch porn, dopamine (the feel good chemical in our brain) is released and it feels really good. Our brains are overwhelmed by what it’s taking in and wants us to remember the choices we made that made us feel good. It causes us to repeat the behaviour until it becomes muscle memory and we don’t think about it anymore, we just do it. Any emotion you are feeling that doesn’t feel good (stressed, alone, rejected, etc) will cause your brain to turn to the thing that does make it feel good - porn.  

Instead of processing the emotions, we turn to this emotional stimuli. But this doesn’t get rid of the emotions. They are still there but you can become numb to them. And this will affect us physically, relationally, mentally and in lots of different ways. We are made to feel all these emotions. We need to feel and then process things. We can become more aggressive and short with people. We lack patience because we aren’t content or at peace because we haven’t dealt with our emotions. 

Porn has subliminal messages.

Porn puts messages in your mind that you aren’t even aware of. Remember that we aren’t good enough to withstand it. We try to justify that it’s healthy or helps your sex life. But it will fuel your fantasy life in a wrong way, your dissatisfaction in life. Be aware of the damage of porn in your life. Your self worth, value and the way you view yourself is altered when you are viewing porn and it will affect the decisions you make in life. We need to replace the seat that porn has in our life with God and allow his love and acceptance into our lives. We need to be open to what God has for us and surrender to him. 

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Podcast Hosts

BRADEN HAFNER

Braden is the Regional Director in Alberta for FamilyLife Canada. He has been married for 14 years to his wife Kristen, and they live in Edmonton, Alberta. He is passionate about seeing marriages grow and thrive, and helping couples move to a deeper oneness with one another and with God. FamilyLife Canada has a variety of resources and events to help you and your spouse take your marriage to the next level. See what would benefit you at www.familylifecanada.com

MATT CLINE

Matt and his wife Louise raise their little guys, David and Oliver, in Edmonton, Alberta. He is honoured to do what he can to tackle the epidemic of pornography and sexual perversion in every way possible. Seeing lives and marriages get free and experience the love of God in profound ways is what drives him every day. He leads Restored Ministries, is a certified speaker and coach for the John Maxwell Team, and formerly played hockey in the WHL and for Hockey Canada. You can visit www.restoredministries.ca.