Taming tense turkey talk: How to set the table for civil conversation this holiday season

For a holiday centered on gratitude, Thanksgiving is also a recipe for tension. If you’re among the 60 percent of Coloradans traveling for the holidays, you’re likely navigating congested roads or chaotic airports. (Yeah, we're looking at you, DIA!) If you’re hosting dinner, you’ve got a whole other set of concerns, like catering to an array of dietary needs, and getting a hundred different dishes to come out of the oven at the same time.

OK, so you did it — you made it to grandma’s, or you cooked the turkey just right. Now the wine is flowing like water and it’s time to relax. But not so fast… even in the kindest of families, with the best of intentions, friendly dinner table discussions sometimes sour. And we’ve all got plenty of opinions, whether it’s on the war in the Middle East, reproductive rights, or the upcoming presidential election. But with some thought and intention, you don't have to dread the holiday dinner discussion. 

“Sometimes when you have a pretty good conversation with someone, the main thing you realize is, wait, we don't disagree nearly as much,” says Martín Carcasson, a communications professor at Colorado State University and director of CSU's Center for Public Deliberation. “I'm not saying we're all going to agree … but normally the disagreement is much more manageable than we think it is when we have a good conversation."

Ahead of the holiday season, Carcasson gave us some guidance on how to have healthier conversations at the dinner table. And for more tips on how to navigate the holiday dinner conversation, Carcasson recommends this Monica Guzman TED talk, or the discussion guides at Living Room Conversations.