Ep 223: Relationship Checkup - Is it working or not
This episode is about taking stock of a relationship and deciding how you feel about it in an honest way. Maybe you’re considering a breakup, or you don’t know that just yet but you’re not happy with how things are. We can often feel lonely while in partnerships; we can’t share everything with a partner. And as we change, we renegotiate what we want from another person. We also move through many phases as individuals and what we require from our partner also changes. All of that is to say, it’s healthy to think through how we fit together with others, throughout our lives.
I think one great way to tell how we feel about someone is to examine our own behavior: the things we are doing on a loop. When we can see a fight loop, we can see perhaps we are not accepting the truth of who someone is, or we can see our own unmet needs arising. This is how we move forward and grow up in a sense – by becoming aware.
This is all about getting square with you: knowing where you stand instead of fighting with what is. When we can move from what is, we can honor ourselves AND our relationship! And in some cases that means coming out of the closet on what we truly want. Nothing bad about that – it just is. Accept and welcome it. When we draw boundaries around that concept, we create a life that rewards us.
A caveat: You can’t decide something based on another person’s advice or opinion – it comes down to what’s right for you. If you’re not ready for action, processing feelings is a great place to start.
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