Ep 2114 Mastering the Art of Handling Criticism

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From the 5th quarter studios in Madison, Wisconsin, you're listening to Coach Unplugged with your host, Steve Collins.

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Let's head off to the podcast. Today, we're talking about criticism in coaching. As a coach, you'll definitely have people who don’t like what you do.

Right now, I'm in our golf season, and a parent criticized me about the schedule and the clarity of where the JV and varsity should be. Our varsity typically goes out to play meets, and we allow JV players based on available spaces at the course. It’s a very fluid situation most of the time.

Parents can get frustrated when they don’t know where their player is supposed to be. We try to get all the information out in a timely manner based on what we have. Criticism is often fair, and we assume the best intentions from parents. They just want to know the information in a timely manner.

A lot of criticism can be managed by over-communicating to parents. Teenagers often don’t talk to their parents about what you say. If I have to change something, I communicate that to the parents as well. Over-communicate to take care of it.

At any given time, only a few kids are super happy. The 5th player thinks he should be the 2nd player. If you’ve built relationships, communication, and trust, it’s hard for them to hate you because they know you have the best intentions. I tell this in my first parent meeting: I can only play 5 kids. There are 15 on the roster. It’s a math problem.

I tell coaches to have their players put down how many minutes they think they should play, tally it up, and compare it to the actual minutes. This puts things in perspective. Show this to the parents too. Reality and perception are different things. Parents love their kids and want them to be happy and play. They don’t always see the bigger picture.

Criticism is part of the game. Have thick skin and be willing to take it. Once the kids leave, parents don’t think about you. This is just a point in their lives.

Assume criticism comes from a place of concern. It's not personal. Move on from it.

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