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Ross O'Carroll-Kelly

Ross O'Carroll-Kelly

Comedy

It’s a miracle Sorcha’s old man has never killed me, though he did buy me a plot in Shanganagh Cemetery for my 40th

It’s a miracle Sorcha’s old man has never killed me, though he did buy me a plot in Shanganagh Cemetery for my 40th

2024-08-16
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Sorcha says this is the worst thing I’ve ever done to her. It’s not the worst thing I’ve ever done to her. It’s not even in the top 10. But I don’t think it’s going to help my case if I stort running through some of my greatest hits.

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More Episodes

‘People in the crowd are staring at Honor like she’s a cold sore on debs night’
2024-11-01
‘The thought of booking a table for one at Shanahan’s on the Green got me through my prison sentence’
2024-10-26
JP is staring at me like I’ve said I’m really enjoying his old dear’s OnlyFans account
2024-10-18
‘A threesome?’ Sorcha goes. ‘Why would you think I’d be into having a threesome?’
2024-10-11
‘Things have changed since you were at school, Sorcha,’ the old man goes. ‘We recognise that traditional media is our enemy now’
2024-10-04
The competition gets under way. The entrants are each told to remove a sock and put it in the pint glass in front of them
2024-09-30
‘Your father is a moral eunuch, Ross. Those aren’t my words. That was a main finding of the Mahon tribunal’
2024-09-20
The porty invitations were returned with the words, ‘Honor O’Carroll-Kelly? Are you focking kidding me?’
2024-09-13
A lot of things are storting to make sense, including the violin case Leo carries around with him like a Chicago gangster
2024-09-06
‘Our daughter is nothing like Donald Trump, Sorcha – aport from the tan and the vengefulness’
2024-08-30
Sorcha knows my game. She can read me like the instructions on an airplane vomit bag
2024-08-23
‘Are you aware that your children are Protestants now?’
2024-08-09
How do you become a Protestant? ‘You have to drink the blood of a Sussex chicken on Dalkey Island under a gibbous moon’
2024-08-03
Honor has picked a theme for her year as Mount Anville head girl: ‘Vengeance’
2024-07-26
‘Protestants are not that much different from us. I mean, they’re definitely less craic, but they get sh*t done’
2024-07-19
‘What’s on offer,’ she goes, smiling, ‘is eternal life,’ and I do believe she’s flirting
2024-07-12
‘Ross, it’s not just a case of filling out a form and – hey, presto – you’re a Protestant’
2024-07-05
Honor goes, ‘I was into Taylor Swift before, like, anyone?’
2024-06-28
Sorcha goes, ‘You had an erotic dream – about my mom?’
2024-06-21
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