We’re back, bitches! And so is everything that made this show great. HOO BOY WHAT A SEASON PREMIERE!
Mom feels! Road trips! Jasper closure! Clarke as a video game character, wandering through post-apocalyptic wastelands and collecting emotionally-loaded power-up items! Bugs for lunch! Pinterest-worthy outdoor decorating schemes! A smol with a bear trap! Echo/Monty parallels! The mythology of Octavia Blake! Increasingly desperate collect calls to space, waiting for Bellamy to answer his fucking phone! Good earth cleavage! An unexpected opportunity to cry over “An American Tail!” A line Erin laughed so hard at that she sliced it out to make it her ringtone! TWENTY-SEVEN FULL MINUTES CARRIED SOLO ON ELIZA TAYLOR’S TINY AUSTRALIAN SHOULDERS WITH NO SCENE PARTNER EXCEPT A BIRD
Come along on this journey with us, friends, we’ll even let you call shotgun.
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0:00 - We’re Back, Bitches! And So Is the Show We First Fell In Love With
0:04 - We Fully Could Have Watched Another Forty Minutes of Just Clarke
0:14 - Sticks, Rocks and Goggles: Clarke Collects Quest Items to Help Her Survive
0:20 - MOM FEELS MOM FEELS MOM FEELS
0:23 - The Crumbling of Polis, In More Ways Than One
0:29 - Heroes and Monsters: Madi’s Fairy-Tale Lens on the World
0:35 - The Wreckage of Arkadia Fucked Us RIGHT the Fuck Up
0:37 - The Jasper Moment Our Hearts Needed
0:43 - Clarke’s Drawings, Maya’s iPod, and the Beauty of Shallow Valley: Creativity Is What Makes Us Human and Keeps Our Memories Alive
1:05 - The Pitfalls of Mythologizing the People We’ve Lost
1:09 - Interrogating the Stories Clarke Tells Herself About Herself
1:17 - “They Had Their Reasons Too,” and Clarke’s Picture of Her New Self, Go Right Out the Window When Madi’s In Danger
1:25 - Brief Sidebar to Yell About Bible Imagery Because #Brand
1:30 - “Say Five Nice Things About Yourself” vs. “Fight to the Death in This Terrifying Murder Pit”: Boy the Blakes’ Discipline Techniques Sure Are Different Aren’t They
1:32 - Murphy, Clarke, Adaptability, and the Impermanence of Change
1:36 - Space!Emori Is Already One of the Greatest Gifts of Season 5
1:44 - In Which Murphy Is a Cat
1:49 Soft Bearded Space Dad Bellamy Is Our Everything, Even Though He CLEARLY Has One Foot Out the Door
1:52 - Obligatory “Somewhere Out There” Reference Because We Are Children of the 90’s
1:54 - RAVEN IS DOING HER GODDAMN BEST DON’T @ HER
1:57 - Bellamy Is Mythologizing His Sister in Absentia While Echo Can See Her Pretty Clearly
2:06 - “What Are We Now?”: Becho, Marper, and Situational Identity
2:19 - Please Oh Please Give Echo a Real Arc So She’s More Than Just a Love Interest
2:27 - Becho Together, Memori Apart: Setting Up a New Status Quo So It Can Be Disrupted
2:34 - Patience Is a Virtue, in Narrative As in Life
2:39 - ENTER ELIGIUS, and Our New True Love Charmaine Diyoza
2:44:15 - The Most Iconic Line in Meta Station History
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