Blue-Collar Leadership: Leading from the Front Lines Part 20 of 30. Seek first to understand. You will always learn more from listening than from speaking. If you truly want to increase your influence, slow down, pause, and choose to listen first. When you do, you're allowing the other person the courtesy of influencing (leading) you first. Once others feel completely understood, they are far more likely to listen to you and accept your influence. However, if others don't feel understood, they're not listening at all. They are waiting for you to quit talking, so they can start talking. Instead of listening with the intent to understand, they are listening with the intent to reply.
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