Healthy Ways to Handle Failure

Failure feels terrible. Maybe you didn’t get a job you applied for, maybe your idea for a school fundraiser was a total dud, or maybe you just got impatient and yelled at your kids. Again. When we fail, we are sometimes tempted to live in denial or drown our sorrows in unhealthy ways, but this week I want to invite you to spend some time thinking about healthy ways to respond to failure—so we can learn and grow from our experiences. See the full shownotes as ascensionpress.com/girlfriends Snippet from the Show “Sometimes when we fail, the temptation is to feel like you don’t have any control, but in any situation, you can choose how you react.” 1) Acknowledge how you feel. Don’t pretend it didn’t happen or that it doesn’t matter. If you are feeling angry or sad or embarrassed, allow yourself to fully experience that feeling without judgment. 2) Stop any negative coping. Avoid engaging in numbing behaviors like drinking or overeating. A little indulgence might be soothing, but make sure this is not your go-to for bad feelings. 3) Find helpful outlets. Find out what will help you process what you are feeling in a healthy way. Calling a friend or venting to your husband can be helpful. Or maybe go for a long drive or take a walk to be alone for a while. Of course prayer works here too! 4) Accept responsibility. Find out how you might have contributed to the failure. What did you do or not do that caused it? Don’t look to blame others. 5) Learn from it. Failure can help us to better understand the kind of people we are, the kind we want to be, or in what ways we still need to work on ourselves or gain new skills. What can you learn about yourself, about others, or about what your goals are and should be from your experience of failure? 6) Make a plan for the future. Do not stay there in your failure! Make a plan to apply for a new job, make a new friend, learn a new skill, or … whatever you decide comes next!