Episode 143-Mindfully Coping With The Belief That Anything Can Lead To "Something Else" And With Expectations, Desires, And The Emotional Suffering That Can Arise From This Habit Of Mind

When I was a child
I daydreamed all the time about a present moment that didn't exist and that never came to pass.

When I was a teenager
I daydreamed about a future
that existed only in my mind and that never came to fruition.

When I was an adult
I gave up daydreaming and yearned constantly for "something else"
I truly believed that there could be and would be a life
outside of the place that I felt trapped in
A life that would bring fulfillment and happiness that I imagined and really believed was possible.

When my ego and identity was finally shattered
When what I believed was "I" "died"
I finally woke up from the dream
I finally saw through the illusion.

Once I was awake
I could finally accept the death
I could finally accept and embrace the death of all of my illusions and delusions.

Once I left my "illusion body" behind
I could finally embrace and live in the here and now
I could live in the present moment
A present moment that contains nothing other than what is and that leads to nothing other than other present moments.

Once I let go of it all
I could truly see what remained
I could truly see that this is all there is
I could see that what happens next is what happens next
I could see that what happens next has nothing to do with what we want to happen next
I could see that what happens next will most likely not bring the fulfillment we seek
I could see that all there really is to do is to live fully in each moment as it happens and to live fully within any joy and pain that arises.

Once my eyes were opened
I could embrace all of the emptiness that used to sadden and scare me
I could see the dark void that anything that happened arose from
I could see the emptiness that anything happened eventually returned to
I could allow myself to look right into the void and not be afraid
I could finally live within that emptiness and know that searching for and craving any of the things that I wanted as a child, teenager, or an adult were no longer necessary
I could finally live not needing "something else"
I could finally live amidst what actually is and actually be sustained by it
I could finally die completely immersed in the "this is all that there is.