I wanted to change my body as a way to prove to myself & others that I was good enough, strong enough & capable enough. My appearance didn't match the strong person I knew I was on the inside.
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Growing up, food was love. Food was comfort. What I've come to realize is that my family loved me in a way that was sabotaging me. It was in my DNA. I turned to food for pleasure. I turned to food for satisfaction. I turned to food to procrastinate or avoid a task I didn't want to start.
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I felt victim to my circumstances. I didn't feel like I was in control of my eating. It was like food had shifted from a pleasure to a demon in my life. It consumed my thoughts, my mind and caused me stress, anxiety and worry.
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I have come to recognize that I had let food take over. I gave food the power. It was controlling me.
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Maybe this sounds like you? Maybe you don't feel in control of your life, your choices, your decisions? Maybe you keep sabotaging yourself or you make progress & then screw it up?
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You're not alone. I was right there with you. And I realized needed help.
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It wasn't until earlier this year when I reached out to a friend (& fellow coach), for help. I was struggling but on the surface, pretending like everything was just fine.
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I was trying to rely on willpower. But our willpower is limited. And my ability to resist short-term temptations in order to meet long-term goals was just plain old non-existent. I couldn't get out of the cycle.
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I struggled so hard bc I didn't feel worthy enough or good enough to actually achieve the success and the body I was working so hard for. All bc of a comment someone said to me.. "Sam, you're a lot more fit than you look." I buried that comment deep down until very recently.
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I realized I would kick ass in the gym, then ruin my progress as a result of sabotage.
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Fast forward to today.. I know that I am in control. I have the power to change my story. I can rewrite the story I tell myself.
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And so I have rewritten it. Find out how on this episode!
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