When we pace someone that we are trying to help, we are moving at their rate of growth, not ours. When we outpace their rate of growth, we come across as being demanding or pushy. The person we are helping will often respond to that by growing less. If we use encouragement and love, the person we are helping is more likely to grow at a faster rate. People have their agency. If they do not want to grow, there isn't anything that we can do to make them. When this happens, it is best to be patient until that person can recognize their need to change. It is okay to point out the problem too them, but after the problem is pointed out, take a step back and wait. It takes time for people to digest information.
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