Episode 49: Talking Evolving Sexuality With A Girlfriend
An interview with a longtime friend about personal sexual evolutions… actually, less of an interview and more of “recorded girl talk”
We start by recounting the start of our friendship and openness among the two of us and others regarding the discussion of sex.
Jenny grew up as a preacher’s kid, with conservative values and many restrictions — no dating, no sex before marriage, no pants, no short hair — and now she’s open and exploring her sexuality with abandon!
How did this evolution occur? She was determined after adult sex sans orgasms for years. Now she has discovered she’s a squirter and owns nipple clamps ;)
Her plan was aided by therapy and being encouraged to explore by the therapist and friends, plus dating more and maturing, getting better at picking partners. As her intentions grew, she became more vocal about asking for what she wanted and moving forward with trying new things. There was one guy in particular that she tried a whole bunch of new things with and in a more committed relationship type of setting.
What was her “talk” like with her family? Turns out it never happened. She also didn’t feel comfortable talking with her older sister about it. And it wasn’t just the sex talk, the period talk didn’t either. Development occurred at her own hand and contributed a lot to her slow progression but also her determination to know and do more. These days, she works at a middle school and she makes sure the kids know they can come to her and speak about sex and periods and anything else they want.
We detour with some personal sharing of period stories and experiences with mothers. Specifically, learning how to use tampons and pads and the hands-on approach my own mother took. Also a bit about our experience viewing sex in movies and how long it took for both of us to get our first vibrators.
Are our evolutions the result of age or something more specific? Is it our social circles or just maturity? There certainly is a confidence that comes with age.
How about the stuff she’s interested in trying? Threesomes and new positions!
And since she mentioned threesomes, we get into some nitty gritty about male bisexuality and sexual fluidity, especially as it relates to her own relationship… she used to be threatened by it and now she feels like it’s natural and not something to be concerned about. Though it does still give her pause some times.
And when she says threesome, does she mean MMF or FFM? FFM! She digs women and thinks they are lovely, seems easier to imagine and something she’s interested in exploring. If she was to have a MMF threesome with a man that had bisexual tendencies, would that be threatening? In thinking about it, she sees the FFM setup as being a bit safer but also she would prefer to have all the attention in any setup. Maybe just add more of each gender to balance everything out?
We dabble into my own threesome experiences…
And that get into the anal sex and how she wants to get into it more and the experience I had that made me an anal sex convert [magic wand!!]. This led to my memory of our initial encounter and how I had promised I was going to draw her a “how to” book about successful masturbation and other sex stuff.
That conversation led to some bondage talk — the experiences we’ve both had and what has worked best. Rope stuff, ball gags, handcuffs, etc…
We finish up with her musing about the vanilla direction she feels her current relationship is headed, her concerns and plans to focus more on spicing things up. This leads to discussing watching porn with partners and how we each watch porn.
We love each other :) The end.
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