#208: Stop Telling Yourself That Having a Great Man in Your Life Is Not That Important with Anna Rova

I come to you today with some tough love.

My intention is to move you in the right direction. In the direction of what you want.

Of what you DESERVE.

Which is a stable man to build an exciting and solid future with. A committed masculine man on whom you can rely to just fucking be there.

This week I’ve had more than 20 one-hour calls with women to discuss whether they’re ready to make a PERMANENT change in their life and start attracting a different caliber of men.

Better men.

Not the ones who are wishy-washy, don’t know what the hell they want from life or who they are. These men are waiting for a woman to come in and tell them what to do. Do you want a man like that?

Yuck.

That’s what I thought, too.

And also not the man who’s so cocky and alpha that you can smell his ego before he walks into the room. Too full of himself. Too proud (and too scared) to have a real connection with a woman. Too chicken to take responsibility and commit to one woman and create a family.

All the women I talk to don’t want these types of men but they seem to be attracting exactly those. These women are intelligent, hard-working, ambitious, and independent. They’re brilliant.

I know you’re one of those women too.

You keep hitting the same roadblock in your dynamics with men. You keep seeing the same pattern. You keep falling asleep at night knowing the clock is ticking. Thinking that it might be too late. Knowing that this is painful enough that you book a discovery call with me on a Saturday night.

And yet you’re too afraid to admit that this is such a deep pain of yours and afraid to take the next step and invest in yourself to make the necessary shift.

Because you’ve been running on independent masculine engines for so long.

Because you think this is not so bad. It’s not actually that important.

“I’m going to wait and see. To read a few more books, buy a few more (useless) $300 courses. Listen to a few more podcasts.”

Well, you’ll be listening and reading for a long time.

Because this stuff is hard to figure out on your own. It’s not impossible, but just really hard if you’re not a professional in it, living and breathing it day in and day out.

And it’s going to take time. Hell, it took me four years (!) to get this shit sorted through courses, books, and starting my own podcast talking to men all day long.

Do you have that time to invest? Likely not.

So you gotta get real. You gotta finally admit that this is too painful. That this is consuming 80% of your emotional, mental and material space and energy.

And you gotta get serious about solving this issue NOW.

You also have to understand that all the money, energy, and effort you’re putting into finding the right guy, looking good, spending hours and hours talking to girlfriends, and listening to podcasts is COSTING you.

It’s costing you your youth, it’s costing you reproductive success and it’s costing you money.

Women tell me they don’t want to invest $3,000 in a high-level program that will surely bring them the men they want to be attracting but they do spend waaaay more than that on beauty treatments, shopping, hair, and nails in 3 months. And all these things are great but they do not solve the core issue: your limiting beliefs about men that keep you in the same pattern of attracting the unavailable or feminine men. And they definitely won’t fix you being in your masculine energy all the time. You can look at an amazing feminine woman on the outside but be hard as a rock on the inside not letting any man in.

Putting things into such a perspective helps you see that you can’t afford not to do it.

So ask yourself how long are you willing to do what doesn’t work? And how much is getting that stable solid relationship worth to you?

Because there is not enough time. You can’t sit there and wait for things to fix themselves.

Your man is not going to arrive out of nowhere.

Great men want great women who stand strong in their feminine power. Great men want women who know how to be women.

So stop lying to yourself that it’s not too bad… Stop telling yourself that your life is great even without a man in it.

Because it’s not great.

Because you deserve love, connection and intimacy. Because you deserve that security and safety. Because at the end of the day, when you’ve made all the decisions at work, told kids what to do and managed everything by yourself — you just want someone to fall back into.

To be held. To be supported. To be cherished.

To trust and to be led.

To experience an incredible life full of adventure, companionship, and happiness.

Because that’s what life is about. The choice of your mate is THE MOST IMPORTANT DECISION OF YOUR LIFE.

Not your career or your business, and not your success. Success will come triple-fold if you have that stability and that foundation in your relationship that will be there, long-term.

I know this because I am a woman and I feel it too.

And I have that.

And it feels fucking amazing to be with a man like that.

From this place, I can finally relax and surrender. I can let go. I don’t have to worry about “where is this going?!” I have a solid foundation to take risks and dream big. To show up differently with my friends, family, and everyone else.

I have the freedom to be me.

I know you want that too.

So quit hiding. Quit saying you don’t have the money. Because you don’t have the man too.

And the longer you hide, the longer it will take you to accept that you need help.

It doesn’t have to be me you’re working with. Although I must say, I have a unique solution to your pain and can help. Because I’m committed to your success and I’m invested in this long-term. And because I’ve seen it working 100% of the time.

Whoever you decide to work with — make sure they’re solid and they’re showing real results with their clients. And make sure they’re charging a high price. In this space, you truly get what you pay for. Your pain is big so it will take a big investment to solve it. But it’s an investment that’s 1000% worth it.

Take the step. Quit hiding and being scared.

I know you’re an incredible woman who’s achieved incredible things in your life. Now it’s time to take that energy and put it into solving your relationship issues and start attracting better men.

Because you’re worthy of it!

Because you deserve it!

The voice in your head that’s doubting this reality — IS NOT YOUR VOICE. It’s the voice of your parents, relatives, friends, culture, and society at large that told you that men are weak and you can’t trust them.

That voice is telling you that you might not be worth it, that something is wrong with you.

I’m here to tell you that all of that is BS. You have the ability and the capacity to build yourself back up. It’s all in your head. It’s all in your body.

So do it. Stand up for yourself and make it work.

You gotta choose whether you:

1. hustle, dip into your savings or any other solution and invest in yourself, or
2. continue making poor choices with men

A woman who is ready to take things to the next level will find a way. As women, we have millions of years behind us of figuring out how to make it work when we want it to work.

Do it for yourself. Do it for your future. Do it for your children and for all the other women in the world who are on the verge of giving up.

Alright, tough love over.

I still love you.