Ask Margaret - Can I Say "No Gifts" For My Kid's Birthday?

Birthday parties are terrific but birthday party gifts are a drag for parents - giving gifts adds extra stress and receiving gifts can mean a house full of plastic stuff that nobody needs. But is it possible to say "no gifts" for your kid's birthday? This week's question comes from our Facebook group: Katie asks: What are your thoughts on putting a request for no gifts on children's party invitations? I know Emily Post considers it a major faux pas, but my inclination is that the rules can be relaxed for 4 year olds (and their busy, perpetually stressed, pandemic-induced socially anxious parents) Yes, you can say no gifts for your child's birthday, although four may be a little young. Consider encouraging your child to find a cause or organization they would like to support and ask people to either bring a gift or a donation (for example: dog food for a local shelter) or a gift. Your child will likely get a mix of gifts and things to donate and then they can come with to the animal shelter to see their donations given to the dogs. It's a great lesson for kids in how we can enjoy getting gifts and also share our gifts with others. Over time your child may decide that they enjoy helping the shelter even more than getting gifts. You can also talk to your kids about the environmental impact of plastic toys and help them see that getting fewer gifts is better for the Earth. You can choose to simply have a "no gift" party but you'll get better results if you get some serious buy-in from your kids on the reason for going gift-free. When it comes to bringing gifts to other parties, you don't get a vote. If your child's friends decide to do gifts, you have to bring one. You can make your gifts simple (Margaret stocks up on gift cards to the local bookstore) but you don't get to decide "no gifts" for anyone other than your child. Special thanks to our "Question of the Week" sponsor: Jane.com is a boutique marketplace featuring the latest in women’s fashion, accessories, home decor, children’s clothing, and more. By shopping at jane.com, you support small businesses, 1500 of which are women-owned. And you will not believe the prices! Visit jane.com/laughing. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices