"I" statements are more effective than "You" statements.

I just finished reading the book, The Power of Positive Confrontation by Barbara Pachter with Susan Magee and in it they highlight the benefit of using "I" statements.

Instead of saying . . .

"You're wrong," say, "I disagree."

"You're not explaining it right," say, "I don't understand."

"You're always late," say, "I need you to be on time."

"You talked back to me," say, "I need you to respect me in front of the team."

"You didn't tell me," say, "I didn't know."

"You're in my seat," say, "I also have that seat."

Changing the emphasis from "You" (accusatory) to "I" will allow the experience to better for both people involved.

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