Episode 72: Switching it up! Is your parent at risk of a catfish scam?

While we must be focused on keeping our kids safe in the digital world, we can't neglect the risk to our parents too! Is your parent at risk of a catfish scam?

 

For more info on catfish scams & resources: https://againstscammers.com/10-tips-to-avoid-a-catfish-scam/

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Full Transcription: 

Speaker 1 (00:00):

We spend all this time working on being that mom that is proactive in this space and that has all the tips and the tools and is guiding our kids to be healthy and strong as they grow up and mature without having all the negative influences of the digital world. But holy Toledo, have you ever thought about the fact that our kids are being thrown into this world at the same time that our parents are? And depending on our age, we're kind of like a sandwich generation where we not only need to be concerned about what's going on with our kids, but also our parents who grew up in a largely non-digital world and are being thrown into this space. And what if they are scammed? Holy cow, this is a whole nother topic that never even entered my realm of consciousness until today. Stay tuned. Let's chat about it.

Speaker 2 (00:56):

Welcome to your source for tips, tools, and support to help you be that mom that is tuned in and proactive for yourself, your family, and for the wild ride of raising kids in this digital age, inspired by a mother's love with a relatable real life. Proud to be that mom flair. This is the bead that mom movement with your host, Dolly Denson

Speaker 3 (01:22):

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Speaker 1 (01:57):

This topic is kind of one of those topics that maybe is not something to be worried about, but at the same time, it totally should be. If you think about all of the scammers that are out there, like they're trying to get it, our children. And then most of the time, most adults probably have enough little red flags going off that they are able to catch the scammers in the act and not let it go too far before they realize it's a scam. But what if you have someone who is perhaps older in one of the older decades of their lives, and perhaps they've lost a spouse that they have been married to for many years, or perhaps they have somewhat of a mental decline and maybe we've given them a smartphone so we can make sure we can stay in touch. What if someone comes along and is able to slip into their circle of trust and start praying on them, just like our children are preyed upon what if they prey upon their loneliness, they prey upon their desire for companionship.

Speaker 1 (03:02):

And they prey upon the fact that they can exploit those things in order to get money from them. This is actually a thing. And some people call it cat fishing, where they exploited kind of a romantic interest, and then somehow gained their trust. Much like kids are groomed by predators and then try to get money from them. I've heard of people saying that their parents were scammed out of a hundred thousand dollars in money that these people exploit them for. They may make up some type of story about how, you know, they are looking for someone to be with and they want to come see them, but they can't get there yet because you know, there's some financial hardship. Can you send me some money? Can you send me a gift card? Can you help me out in this way? And older adults are actually getting sucked into this and not realizing that it's a scam until they have like been scammed out of a ton of money and, you know, emotionally impacted to a great degree.

Speaker 1 (04:11):

I've heard of, there was one person that someone was talking about in this parent group I'm in, it just happened to be that, you know, this parent tech group that I'm in on Facebook, someone brought it up and said, this isn't necessarily related to kids, but I'm really struggling with this right now. And I was just amazed to read through the comments and see all the people who have had parents or grandparents that have been scammed by this. And I remember my own grandpa, um, which he's been gone since 1998. And at that time he was 78 when he passed away. So he passed away kind of young by today's standards, but he was involved in something where he sent money and he got some little things back in the mail and he was just convinced that someday he was going to win a bunch of money from doing it.

Speaker 1 (04:52):

You got all the little, all these little trinkets and a mail opener and different things like that. So, you know, he got some stuff out of it, but that was before all the digital things, you know, that was before the internet was here. So I can imagine that if he had a smartphone or somehow access to the internet, that he may have not had the, the mindset or the judgment to know that he was being scammed and thinking, you know, that these either, you know, companionship or wealth or something like that would have enticed him. So I just wanted to bring this topic up just because it is something that we need to think about. And we need to kind of be aware of, and talk to our parents about it. Some people were saying that they actually put like parental control things like bark on their parents' phone.

Speaker 1 (05:39):

If they felt like they were cognitively not able to have all of the judgment that they should have. And, you know, they didn't, they were concerned about them not having the red flags go up. And those types of things, just so the child, the adult child could monitor the parent's conversations and figure out what was going on. I certainly don't recommend that if you're talking to someone who has all their faculties and is completely coherent trying to do something like that. But I just think it's a good topic for us to think about in terms of, you know, the fact that the digital stuff is ever changing. And there's a lot of facets to it. And I think if someone is not used to how to work the internet and how to do social media and all that stuff, they may not be aware of the fact that there's privacy settings, all the things that we talk about with the kids, right?

Speaker 1 (06:29):

Privacy settings, who is messaging you when you might get hacked. And when you might be getting a friend request from someone who's not a real person, things to look at for that. So again, it kind of goes back to just an education thing and having that conversation with our parents and then also just helping them to navigate it and even offering to somehow monitor what is going on on their phone or their device, so that, you know, you can just be a place for them. Now, if they're already into one of these like catfish type situations, then of course, I recommend that you try to involve local law enforcement or whatever you feel is necessary. Adult protective services, those types of things, to bring them in, in order to keep them safe. But it really sounds like it's a really tricky situation for a lot of people.

Speaker 1 (07:18):

If you've got someone who believes they're truly in a romantic relationship or that, you know, this is a legit thing that they're dealing with, then you have a whole nother situation there because you have to not convince them, but, you know, help show them that it's not legit. And, you know, they may already be very emotionally invested in this relationship to where it is going to be very traumatic for you to tell them that you are, or for you to tell them or help them to see that this isn't legit and that this person is fake or they're to take advantage of them. So it can be a very tricky situation, but I just wanted to bring it up for today's podcast episode and just talk about the fact that it is like, we are kind of a sandwich generation between helping guide our kids who are younger and growing up in this very interconnected digital world.

Speaker 1 (08:08):

And then parents who were not used to being as connected and also maybe not, uh, realizing how vulnerable they can be when they are online and when they have a smartphone. So it's, it's just kind of our place to be in this space and talk to them, communicate, set up boundaries, guidelines, tools, all the things I talk about with kids to help our parents in that realm too. If they're not someone who you think realizes the scope of all of this and the possibility that they could be scammed or being manipulated, groomed all of those things, just like a child is when they're online and vulnerable. Okay. So just to bring that topic up today, I was actually just looking at Facebook and came across this post and was like, oh my gosh, I never even thought about this. And my parents and my in-laws, they both are of the age that they probably are pretty, you know, they're pretty savvy with the things, but I can see like just a little bit older than them, like my grandparents' age, they would have just been blown away by having to have, you know, having a phone and all of that.

Speaker 1 (09:12):

They probably would not realize all of the things that could happen and how much they could be taken advantage of. So have a chat with your parents or grandparents, however old you are, and definitely make a game plan together to make sure that they're not put into a situation where they're scammed or catfished into, you know, giving up their money or somehow being taken advantage of. Okay. So hope you found this helpful and I'll chat with you next time.

Speaker 2 (09:41):

Thanks for tuning in being that mom isn't easy, but together we can be that mom's strong. Don't forget to leave a review, connect on social and join Dolly's free community till next time.

Speaker 3 (09:55):

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