The Mystery of Marriage / Week 4 / The Original Marriage

The Original Marriage

Genesis 2 July 11, 2021

I. Introduction:

A. We are living in a time when the very foundations of marriage are being

questioned – questions like: who is marriage for, what is its purpose, how should

it operate; then add to that so many different people speaking into it as if they are

authorities on this.

1. Our culture no longer seeks to find truth but rather constructs its own

subjective personal truth, which results in great confusion about marriage.

2. We as Christians believe there is an objective truth outside of ourselves

regarding marriage that we discover in God and His Word.

3. So let me ask you right at the start – where or who do you look to in order to

get your answers about marriage!

B. So this morning I want to go back to the original marriage where this whole thing

of marriage began with Adam and Eve, so we can see the original design and

purpose for marriage.

1. A design and purpose that is still true today because it is built into the very

nature of marriage!

• So turn in your Bibles to …

II. Genesis 2

A. In chapter 2, He goes back and gives us more detail about what happened on the

sixth day when He created both man and woman and the institution of marriage!

1. Read Genesis 2:18a

2. As we go on in this section God comes up with the solution to this problem

of man’s aloneness – being separated from others in isolation.

B. So the structure to this passage is simple:

1. Problem: aloneness - v18a

2. God’s solution: suitable helper - v 18b

a) Search for a suitable helper - v19-20

b) Creation of suitable helper - v21-23

3. Creation of institution of marriage – v24

C. Read – remember

1. V 19 – earlier in day 6 God had created the animals and now He was bringing

them before Adam

2. V 23 – read this as my Hebrew professor taught us the way the Hebrew

actually should read this – wow! I still have the wow!

• So let’s start by looking at the

III. Woman created as the suitable helper

A. Reread v18

B. We learn in this passage that man and woman are the God created perfect fit and

help to each other.

C. That is what the word suitable means – something that fits another perfectly, the

counter-part, the complement, the answer to what the other needs, the one who

corresponds to, the one who is just right for, the one who harmonizes perfectly

with the other!

1. So it is someone who is different enough to supply what the other lacks but is

similar enough to fit smoothly! They are the perfect answer to what the other

one needs

2. Illustrate with the hands

D. Let’s take the cultural steroids out of the word helper as many have been jacked

up feeling that the word helper means women are inferior to men and just are their

sidekick helpers!

1. If that is your case, it shows you have been more influenced by the culture

than you have been by the Scriptures.

2. Because this word for helper is often used in Scripture of God helping man

and helping Israel, it clearly is not a position of inferiority, it is just a fact that

man needs help!

E. What does he need help for? We learn back in Genesis 1 that God gave man and

woman together the responsibility to subdue the earth and rule over His creation.

We also learn that in Genesis 2 he was to cultivate the garden.

1. Bottom line –marriage is God’s gift to man and woman to have someone to

help them live out all the responsibilities, someone who is an equal who is

similar enough to him yet different enough to provide the help needed.

2. What if you are single? God has given the gift others in the body of Christ to

come along side of you with their differences to support you. Marriage is just

a very unique way God does it.

F. God created the woman to be man’s the suitable helper!

1. We learn in Genesis 1-2 that men and women are absolutely equal in their

dignity and personhood but gloriously different on purpose in order to help

each another.

• All of this drives us into the very

IV. Purpose of marriage

A. Read v24

1. For this reason – that man and women are the perfect complement to each

other and that woman was taken out of man.

2. For this reason... read rest

B. Marriage is all about two absolutely equal but gloriously different people, a man

and a woman, leaving their family of origin to form a brand new family unit,

called “one flesh.”

1. Marriage is all about these two different people blending their entire life

together into one harmonious unit.

2. Unity is not about being the same, or acting alike or even losing your

individual identity.

3. It is quite the opposite. Unity is the blending together in perfect harmony

that which is different.

4. The beautiful dance of two becoming one

• I want to leave us with one key application today

V. God designed our differences to be a blessing!

A. Our differences as male, female and individual human beings are designed to

bless and provide what is lacking for our mate. But Satan uses our differences to

create conflict and separate us!

B. We need to learn to appreciate and tap into our mate’s differences for our own

good!

1. Kim and I are as different as they come! Learning to appreciate and be

blessed by our differences was clearly a long slow difficult process.

2. One area in particular was in the way we think – I am very logical, analytical,

theoretical and internal processor. Kim also is logical but she is more

intuitive, practical, and an external processor.

3. Early on, I thought my way of thinking and processing was superior to Kim’s

and that God wanted me to help her learn a better way to think! As you

might imagine, this was a source of frustration and tension in our

relationship.

4. Long story short - God humbled me many times by showing me often Kim

way of thinking was in the end right and mine was not!

a) I learned that Kim’s way was not inferior but different and I needed to

learn how to gain value from her way of thinking. Learning how to

bring together the two different thoughts and find the better thought, we

can have together as we value and listen to one another!

b) Now I recognize I need Kim’s perspective so I pursue and respect it

before making major decisions

C. Men and women are gloriously different in so many ways and while there are

some generalities that are true of many in each of the two genders, it is not true of

all. Our responsibility is to study and know our particular and unique husband

and wife!

1. We have different personalities, different strengths and weaknesses, different

energy levels and likes and dislikes.

2. We have personal histories that are different, as Kim said a few weeks ago

we are all living a one of a kind story that has never been lived by anyone

before!

3. Our families of origins have deeply affected the way we handle money,

conflict resolution, attitudes towards sex, friendships, recreation, religious

beliefs etc.

4. All of these differences can either bless or frustrate!

D. The two becoming one can be like going on a rafting ride together. You get in the

raft together and at the start, it’s just a lot of fun as you move with the current.

But at some point two different and mighty rivers merge together

1. When they first merge, there is great turbulence and disturbance but once the

two different rivers finally blend and run together it becomes one new mighty

river.

2. The same is true of our marriages – once we learn to navigate and benefit

from the great turbulence and disturbance that our differences bring our

marriages can become a mighty force for God’s glory, blessing each other

and blessing others!

E. So if you are struggling with these differences or the two of you blending together

as one let me encourage you with two things:

1. First, reframe the way you look at your differences,

a) Change the way you think about your differences from something that is

bad, inferior, wrong or needs to be changed,

b) To something that is valuable, a blessing to appreciate and designed to

make you even better!

2. Secondly, live by the truth of 1 Peter 2:25. Read

a) Trust Jesus to point out, sort out and guide you through the hundreds of

things deep within that must be addressed. So you can dance well the

dance of two becoming one and so you can be a blessing to each other

and those around you!