2022-04-11 (The New Blue Gnu Blew the Jiujitsu Ewe Crew Coup to You Who Accrue Zoo Glue in ’22 Edition)

Up the what is fuck, muthafuckaaas?! Emo-muthafuckin’-clew to The New Blue Gnu Blew the Jiujitsu Ewe Crew Coup to You Who Accrue Zoo Glue in '22 Edition of Monday Morning Aural fuckin’ Sex! Of course you motherfuckers know what’s up by now with these bizarrely-named editions. It’s just new shit! Yes, most of it is brand-spankin’-that-ass new, whether in artist, track, or to this podcast. Not only that, Lord Jesus McFartyfuckpants, we have over 5 fuckin’ hours of it ahead of us, and by “we,” and, “us,” I mean, “I,” and, “me.” ‘Cause come on, me, nobody gives half a fossilized chinchilla turd what shit you’ve been listening to lately. Know what though? These are still some of my favorite kinds of editions I put together, because they’re the most accurate reflections of how music reaches my own tender little earholes. Truthishly, the themed editions are more concessions to my already barely-existent audience than things I just put together for my own pleasure, because (as if it’s not already nakedly fuckin’ evident) I believe variety is the spice of fuckin’ life.

 

That’s why so many of these jams that are featured in these types of editions end up featured again in themed ones. Most all of them deserve multiple listens, and since I have a pretty strong suspicion that people generally prefer the themed editions, I try to leave room in those for these. Of course there are plenty that I chock full of new shit too, but I digress. This isn’t all just shit I found last night, either. No indeed, I’ve been accumulating new shit ever since the last new shit edition via YouTube, Insta and various stuff sent to me by friends, which I’ll call out a little later. But yeah, believe it or not, Instagram started inundating me in my feed with ads from bands & individual musicians, and most all that I’ve spent the time to check out have definitely been well worthwhile. I’ll mention which ones a little later, too.

 

Check it out, I even found one of these tracks from a softcore porn video I was watching… for no reason whatsoever. Yeah, many years ago, I downloaded a shitload of videos from a site called Cosplay Erotica. They all have music playing over them, and most of it is just sonic wallpaper from anything I heard, but this one track by DJ Rx actually stood out. So, I stopped… doing absolutely nothing whatsoever specifically so I could Shazam the song, and it turned out that Shazam didn’t have a fuckin’ clue. My next avenue was Googling the lyrics, but even that was a dead end for the most part until I finally stumbled upon the track I was looking for like a half an hour later. What’s fuckin’ stupid to me is that it’s not even the first time I’ve done some shit like that. Any of you fuckin’ filthy-ass perverts remember the songs I discovered through fuckin’ Cock Hero? Yeah, those tracks still have a special place in my cock… I mean heart. Eh, same shit.

 

To elaborate further on this already mildly uncomfortable topic, this is one of the reasons why going to strip clubs kinda pisses me off. 9 times out of 10, I’ll end up focusing more on the music playing than the booty buffet before me, and the tracks that a girl dances to will typically determine whether I get a dance from her. Listen, I’m mostly disinterested in the whole scene as it is, but if all I’m hearin’ is basic bullshit being played, ain’t no way I’m feelin’ inspired to make it rain on anyone. To this day, I remember dances I got from girls who danced to dubstep, Deftones & A Perfect Circle, Slipknot, etc. More to the point, that takes fuckin’ guts to dance to music that most of the so-called clientele has no idea about, ‘cause I’m pretty confident that I’m not the only one who decides on dances that way. Also, in case I’ve never stated it publicly on this podcast, sex work is most definitely work. Not only are the sex workers I know some of the most fantastic human beings ever to grace the rotting bowels of this miserable society, but they deserve both protection and respect for the crucial services they provide.

 

Any-fuckin’-way, I should probably move on and talk about the actual fuckin’ music at some point, eh? Let’s see… First of all, shout out to my friend Shy for the David Garrett version of Darude’s classic dance track, “Sandstorm.” Shout out to my friend Bekah too, ‘cause I’m always reminded of her when I think of that song since she hates it so much. Slim to nil chance either one of them will ever see or hear those shout outs, but they’re there just in case. Shout out to Renee (who actually does listen fairly regularly) for the fantastic Royal & the Serpent tracks. I could have sworn I heard of them before, but knowing myself as I do, I definitely would have put them on a podcast long before this one.

 

Shout out to my roommate Josh too, who inadvertently directed my attention to Brujeria when Brujerizmo was played during Ozark. I heard of them ages ago, but never listened to them ’til then. Also, special shout out to my boy Al, ‘cause we’ve been working on a new Osmium edition for the past two weeks. We’ve actually been conversing, trading notes and such on the various blocks of tracks we’ve assembled, and that’s a format I’ve never done. I used to speak in-between blocks, and my friend Cat chimed in periodically after I’d introduced her, but this is conversational all throughout. I’m really hoping y’all yojne the fuck out of that when I finally finish it, ‘cause it sure has been a pain in the cock working around our individual work schedules and such. We’ve actually got enough compiled for two more Osmium editions, so we’ll see whether the second gets made in the same format or something more streamlined.

 

Let’s see… what else? Well, the artists I found through Instagram ads and listened to either on YouTube or Spotify are Trench, Ferris Blusa, Cat Breath, ROMES, Kanonenfieber, Maggie Lindemann (I think, and I’m super curious if there’s any relation to Till from Rammstein), Afterdusk, Alice Glass (although I know she was in Crystal Castles and I’m super late to that particular party), The Curse of K.K. Hammond, Railgun, Adimiron, Cranes, Mafia Birdhouse, Bernth, Nowhere Left, Down Again, and (fucking finally) Mad Lollypop. Y’all see this problem I clearly have? I s’pose one could call it a form of FOMO, but I dunno, I don’t really fear missing out on it all; I’m just a super fuckin’ curious person, and obviously, music is one of my greatest passions. Shit, it’s one of the reasons I continue to draw breath on this ridiculous fuckin’ planet, so maybe don’t fuck with it. K? K.

 

All that said… let me say some fuckin’ more! Don’t fuckin’ worry, I’ll try to speed it up ‘cause this is already gettin’ to be a Tolstoy of a fuckin’ intro. Let’s go top to bottom here. Another flawless fuckin’ remix from Zardonic in this bitch! Yojne the fuck AND the shit out of that one. YONAKA was a delightful random find that Spotify tossed to me based on its similarity to Royal & the Serpent. Y’all see how fuckin’ easy it is to branch out from the shit you know already? I did it there with literally zero effort. Get off the fuckin’ couch music every once in a while or you’re gonna wake up one day with your flesh fuckin’ fused to that motherfucker. Shout out to fuckin’ Nip/Tuck for that one episode. New ††† tracks! Yeah, that’s fuckin’ right! I’m seriously starting to think Chino is King fuckin’ Midas in this bitch, ‘cause everything the man touches is fuckin’ gold. Yo, I found an EDM remix of the fuckin’ GameCube intro. Doesn’t that sound fuckin’ cool? Listen on and find out for your damn selves!

 

The Kanonenfieber track and the Gareth Emery & Omnia collaboration are about the war in Ukraine, in case y’all might be even moderately curious. The Sigue Sigue Sputnik track isn’t; I know that track from the Ferris Bueller soundtrack, but for whatever reason, I never hunted it down ’til recently. That fuckin’ Converge track? Holy cuntcicles, that track is brutal as 10 fucks on a tricycle built for 2. Pretty sure that shit doesn’t even exist, so just imagine how much brutality is packed in that motherfucker. Access To Arasaka is an IDM artist (as far as I can tell) similar to Cat Breath. IDM (which stands for intelligent dance music… I don’t really know fuckin’ why) is a criminally underrepresented genre on this podcast, and while I’ve played plenty of breakcore, IDM is like breakcore’s more mellow brother or something. I’d classify most of Aphex Twin’s stuff as IDM.

 

Anyway, moving on… a fuckin’ remix of the Thomas The Tank Engine theme by dj-Jo?! Shit, I’m all the way down. I’ve played plenty of dj-Jo’s jams over the years, especially after his remix of Tokyo Ghoul’s theme song annihilated my ear sphincters. Another CORPSE jam in here for us. Really lovin’ all the stuff I’ve heard from him, and that gruff vocal style overall. I’ve been really lovin’ the screamy hip-hop I’ve been finding lately too, so the more the better. A new Otto Von Schirach track for us all, too! Otto’s a looooong time favorite of mine. I’ve had the pleasure of seeing him perform thrice so far, and every time has been such a treat. The dude is basically his own genre along with another guy named Doormouse, and they’re friends & collaborators. Anyone who’s ever heard my breakcore-themed editions ought to know those two magnificent motherfuckers.

 

Always lovely to see a new Catnapp jam grace the podcast, as well. I heard of Catnapp when she worked with Otto on a track a few years prior, and I’ve enjoyed pretty much everything I’ve heard from her. Another flawless fuckin’ t+pazolite track here for us. Starting to think about t+pazolite as I think of Chino, being Midas and all. I can’t recall a single mediocre t+pazolite track, so yojne the fuck out of this one and then listen to all the rest of his stuff. There’ll be a test later. That Architects track, Little Wonder? This is basically the orchestral version of the original. Pretty sure the original is one of the first Architects tracks I ever heard, too. Another lovely proggy jam by Animals As Leaders here as well. I think either Al or Shy got me into them. Anyway, much appreciated, because I haven’t heard a bad track yet from them either.

 

Whoa, Lenny Dee?! Cheezus, I haven’t played much of his stuff at all, but I still love the fuck out of his Industrial Fucking Strength compilations from like 20 years ago. Gabber’s definitely an acquired taste, but I acquired it fast and hard, much like gabber itself. Kinda difficult to listen to a full album of it, but it’s definitely great to get the blood pumpin’. Yo, I have no fucking idea who this Blaze artist is, or what language he’s spittin’, but it’s certainly not Ya Dead Homie. Of course, since Blaze is such a popular artist name, and since Spotify has not yet evolved to a point where they properly separate artists who share a name, there’s a massive catalog there. No idea how many different Blaze’s got lumped in there.

 

Anyway, another Landon Tewers track here. This time, a tender ballad, which is a great departure from the usual fare. I discovered him through Whipits and Cum Captain, both of which are now woefully absent from his Spotify. I guess he’s ashamed of those tracks now or something. Fair enough, but the dude is definitely interesting. I’ve heard him try out at least three different genres so far, and there’s probably even more I haven’t heard yet. Oh, and the live version of Serj Tankian’s song, “Baby,” I included that primarily because of the speech he gives prior to the song. It’s about love of music and the role of artists, and I whole-heartedly agree. The song’s great and all, but I typically don’t bother listening to live stuff ‘cause so much of it is poorly performed or mixed in one way or another.

 

Seems like it’s been quite a minute since I played a 生 Conform 死 song, but they’re another group from whom I’ve yet to hear a mediocre track. They’ve definitely got some unique flavor in their style. Shit, a µ-Ziq track too?! Holy fuckin’ lord, I don’t know if I’ve ever played µ-Ziq on this podcast, but I’ve known of him/them for ages. Another excellent IDM offering right there, so yojne if you can hang. Finally (because I’ve seriously gotta wrap this shit the fuck up already), that Michael Franti track at the end makes me feel like the sun’s shining out my asshole, and I’m not even mad about it. Kinda basic, kinda poppy, but I’ve loved all the other Michael Franti stuff I’ve heard, and this one has an important message in it that ought to be delivered regularly to one and all who continue to suffer through this late-stage capitalist hellscape we call a country.

 

Any-mother-fuckin’-way, that is all. I’m cuttin’ myself off right here, ‘cause I’d like to get to bed at some point before I collapse at the fuckin’ keyboard. Believe me, I could go so much further on and on, but for now, all I must beg of you is that you yojne.

 

 

01 Zak Meow, Born I - Born To Rise (Zardonic Remix) (from Born To Rise (Zardonic Remix)) [00:08:59]

 

02 Trench - Imminent Power Looming (from Encased in Chrome) [00:13:25]

 

03 YONAKA - Seize the Power (from Seize the Power) [00:15:23]

 

04 Royal & the Serpent - IM NOT SORRY (from IF I DIED WOULD ANYONE CARE) [00:18:01]

 

05 Ferris Blusa - The Seventh Day (from Saw Your Worst and I Stayed) [00:20:40]

 

06 Cat Breath - First Steps on a New World (from Rift) [00:22:11]

 

07 ††† - Initiation (from Initiation / Protection) [00:25:19]

 

08 Minnesota - Into The Void (from Into The Void) [00:29:22]

 

09 VGR - GameCube Intro (from GameCube Intro) [00:33:11]

 

10 ROMES - Misery's on Its Way (from Misery's on Its Way) [00:36:09]

 

11 Tantrum Desire - The Arena VIP (from The Flow, Pt. 1) [00:39:07]

 

12 Caliban - VirUS (feat. Marcus Bischoff of Heaven Shall Burn) (from VirUS (feat. Marcus Bischoff of Heaven Shall Burn)) [00:43:17]

 

13 Kanonenfieber - Stop The War (from Stop The War) [00:47:08]

 

14 Giuseppe Ottaviani, Dan Soleil - Hero (from Hero) [00:52:15]

 

15 Sigue Sigue Sputnik - Love Missile F1-11 (from 21st Century Boys - The Best Of) [00:56:31]

 

16 Gareth Emery, Omnia - Unity (from Unity) [01:00:11]

 

17 Big Gigantic, Kota the Friend - Deja Vu (from Deja Vu) [01:03:04]

 

18 Meshuggah - Broken Cog (from Immutable) [01:06:18]

 

19 Maggie Lindemann, Siiickbrain - GASLIGHT! (from PARANOIA) [01:11:51]

 

20 Afterdusk - Love Is Dead (from Love Is Dead) [01:14:18]

 

21 Alice Glass - SUFFER IN PEACE (from PREY//IV) [01:18:34]

 

22 DJ Rx - My Serenity (feat. Jolea) (from http://soundcloud.com/finrg-recordings) [01:20:17]

 

23 Converge - My Great Devastator (Redux) (from The Poacher Diaries (Redux)) [01:25:56]

 

24 Access To Arasaka - zproc3.40mc03 (from :_Port) [01:30:49]

 

25 DRS, T95 - Comme Ci (from Comme Ci) [01:34:24]

 

26 dj-Jo - Thomas The Tank Engine (Remix) (from Thomas The Tank Engine (Remix)) [01:38:08]

 

27 Fury Weekend, Voicians - Signals (Kodeseven Remix) (from Signals (Kodeseven Remix)) [01:39:41]

 

28 CORPSE, OmenXIII - POLTERGEIST! (from POLTERGEIST!) [01:44:12]

 

29 Otto Von Schirach - Demeng (from Demeng) [01:45:49]

 

30 Brujeria - Brujerizmo (from Brujerizmo) [01:49:09]

 

31 ZABO, ARIUS - Death On The Dance Floor (from Death On The Dance Floor) [01:52:58]

 

32 Lo Key, The R.O.C., Kung Fu Vampire - VILLAINOUS (from VILLAINOUS) [01:56:30]

 

33 The Curse of K.K. Hammond - Devil's Kin Blues (from Devil's Kin Blues) [02:00:47]

 

34 Essenger - Plague Doctor (Fury Weekend Remix) (from Plague Doctor (Fury Weekend Remix)) [02:06:43]

 

35 Parov Stelar - Toxic Lover (from Toxic Lover) [02:10:24]

 

36 Railgun - No Machine (from No Machine) [02:13:16]

 

37 Altair Blake - Walking on the Moon (from Walking on the Moon) [02:16:18]

 

38 Adimiron - Zona del silencio (from Et Liber Eris) [02:18:26]

 

39 Purrple Cat - Meteorites (from Sea of Stars) [02:24:02]

 

40 Cranes - Sun And Sky (from Forever (Expanded Edition)) [02:27:02]

 

41 Mafia Birdhouse - Wilt (from Dweller) [02:30:27]

 

42 Cat Breath - In the Dark (from Rift) [02:33:10]

 

43 Bernth - When It Rains, It Pours (from Elevation) [02:37:54]

 

44 David Garrett - Sandstorm (from Music) [02:45:22]

 

45 Rob IYF, Al Storm - Nature (from Cover Up’s EP 1) [02:48:31]

 

46 K15, Lex Amor - Inevitable Winters (from Inevitable Winters) [02:53:27]

 

47 Catnapp - time on me (from time on me) [02:55:47]

 

48 Joachim Pastor, Signum - Something You Need (Stereoclip Remix) (from Something You Need (Stereoclip Remix)) [02:58:51]

 

49 Terror - Boundless Contempt (from Boundless Contempt) [03:05:10]

 

50 t+pazolite - Tales of Hardstyle (from Tales of Hardstyle) [03:07:12]

 

51 V O E - Running Blind (from Running Blind) [03:10:45]

 

52 Oliverse - Turbulence (from Turbulence) [03:15:01]

 

53 Architects - Little Wonder (Abbey Road Version) (from For Those That Wish To Exist At Abbey Road) [03:18:16]

 

54 Camo & Krooked - Loa (Fade Black Remix) (from Loa (Fade Black Remix)) [03:21:57]

 

55 Animals As Leaders - Micro-Aggressions (from Parrhesia) [03:25:50]

 

56 Ferris Blusa - Freddie Blassie (feat. Hollygrove Mikey) (from Saw Your Worst and I Stayed) [03:29:57]

 

57 A-Kriv, Decoding Drums, Lenny Dee - Yugo Stern (from Yugo Stern) [03:32:56]

 

58 Blaze - FRESH (from FRESH) [03:36:17]

 

59 Mors Principium Est - Pure (from Liberate The Unborn Inhumanity) [03:38:17]

 

60 G Mo Skee - That Checks Out (from That Checks Out) [03:44:24]

 

61 Pandrezz, j'san, Epektase - Cristo Redentor (from Chips & Chill) [03:47:22]

 

62 The Roots - Mellow My Man (from Do You Want More?!!!?!) [03:49:50]

 

63 Passarella Death Squad - What We Are, You Shall Be (Cruising for Attention) (CLAIR Remix) (from What We Are, You Shall Be) [03:54:30]

 

64 Balmorhea - Of Hopeful Green Woven (from Of Hopeful Green Woven) [03:58:55]

 

65 ††† - Protection (from Initiation / Protection) [04:00:48]

 

66 Flux Pavilion - You & I (feat. Kata Kozma) (MashBit Remix) (from You & I (MashBit Remix)) [04:04:29]

 

67 Synthion, Kotori - Twin Skies (from Twin Skies) [04:07:44]

 

68 Alex M.O.R.P.H. - Be As One (feat. Cheryl Barnes) (from Be As One) [04:12:10]

 

69 Landon Tewers - Maddie's Song (from Maddie's Song) [04:15:37]

 

70 Arctic Lake - Hesitate (from side by side we lie awake) [04:19:10]

 

71 Serj Tankian & The F.C.C. - Baby (from Live At Leeds) [04:21:44]

 

72 Nowhere Left - Broken Story (from Broken Story) [04:25:48]

 

73 Alice Glass - I TRUSTED YOU (from PREY//IV) [04:28:58]

 

74 Down Again - Can't Make This Right (from Bury the Bones) [04:31:25]

 

75 Erra - Sol Absentia (from ERRA (Deluxe)) [04:35:45]

 

76 Mad Lollypop - Nostalgia Gets The Best Of Us Sometimes (from Ever So Enchanting) [04:39:43]

 

77 eevee, cliffe - till the grave (from dead end) [04:43:59]

 

78 生 Conform 死 - Help Yourself (from Help Yourself) [04:46:42]

 

79 Royal & the Serpent - Happier in Hell (from Happier in Hell) [04:50:15]

 

80 µ-Ziq - Giddy All Over (from Goodbye) [04:53:07]

 

81 William Black, Thomas Laurent - Only One I Need (feat. HALIENE) (Sunny Lax Remix) (from Only One I Need (Sunny Lax Remix)) [04:55:59]

 

82 Michael Franti & Spearhead - Brighter Day (from Brighter Day) [05:01:36]