This week on Poetic Resurrection we're going to discuss expectations. Why do we expect? What do we expect? I believe it depends on the circumstances. If I pay a vendor for a service or a product, I expect it to work. I also expect that this vendor has more knowledge than I do. For example, I expected I would do an episode last week. Well, I also expected to have the internet I pay for but that was not the case. It took me three days to get back online.
It's good to be aware of expectations. Are they realistic? Are we expecting someone to act in a certain way? Expecting others to act according to a preconceived notion then we might have can lead to discontentment? Is that a requirement you'd like others to have of you? Sometimes, when we know the other person well, we expect them to behave a certain way. But people change and they should be allowed to change. There are many expectations that we have and, as I mentioned the vendor. Let us discuss expectations of ourselves and others.
Many expectations are connected to our perceptions of how situations and events need to work out. At the same time, who's to say we're correct? Questioning our perceptions and seeing how they relate to our expectations can enlighten us on what we find important in our lives.
Psychology Today "First, merely expecting something to happen will not make it happen. For many of us, it is difficult to let go of the idea that expecting something to happen will make it happen."
I did this with affirmations. If I state it long enough and with conviction, I expect it would happen. I certainly would be thrilled about it.
"Second, human beings have a natural tendency to pin their hopes for happiness on fulfilled expectations."
My experience with this is perceptions. Our perceptions are if I move to a home, city, country, etc. Then I would be happy. It can be a new job, a new place, or a new relationship. I feel I had to ask myself: why am I wanting to do something different outside myself? Is it me? Am I running from something, someone, or myself? I'm going to go wherever the change is. Is this a pattern in my life?
Psychology Today: "The problem of expectation occurs when we expect something to happen without good reasons for that expectation.
Expecting life to always turn out the way you want is guaranteed to lead to disappointment because life will not always turn out the way you want it to. And when those unfulfilled expectations involve the failure of other people to behave the way you expect them to, the disappointment also involves resentment.
Let go of expectations and find something to be grateful about, even when things do not turn out the way you hoped, and you will experience serenity rather than resentment."
"I have learned that as long as I hold fast to my beliefs and values - and follow my own moral compass - then the only expectations I need to live up to are my own. Michelle Obama"
The poem for this week is Alliance from my upcoming book Inspire Me: Awakening Dreams. You can also read it in my compilation book Inspire Me Series: Book 1 & 2.
Alliance
Sometimes my essence aches because of the many adventures and events others have had—without a mention and I wasn't there. Is it me? Is the perception of what they sense I am—determining my behavior - thoughts? We spoke of holiday - two summers long—set for third. The third visit around the sun and asked—when are we going? I don't know, was the answer. Facing the truth - social media—as I view the celebratory drink in hand with other. Visiting the places, of visual beauty of a distant land we planned. Why not explain—why falsehood? A sadness took over me—was it them? Was it me? Was it my perceptions of childhood memories which stood in the way of the truth? A truth that hasn't existed in decades. A long ago feeling attached to a person whom I've surrendered my alliance. Taking responsibility for my emotions as I breath and let go. Let go of my ideas of the past. Do I blame them - no – I'm accountable for my beliefs. Would we plan again – No. Our characters unveiled the blinders I wore since childhood. Abandoning my memories and allowing myself permission to move on.
Inspire Me Series: Book 1 & 2 is available on Amazon
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/cui-bono/201802/the-psychology-expectations
Music: Pachabelly by Huma Huma
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