495-Unchecked Box Guilt

Do you ever feel guilty for the things that DIDN'T get completed today, even when you did A LOT! This guilt can be detrimental to our happiness; tune in to find out how.   

 

Transcript:

 

Welcome to Everyday Happiness where we create lasting happiness, in about 2 minutes a day,  through my signature method of Intentional Margins® (creating harmony between your to-dos and your priorities), happiness science, and musings about life. 

 

I'm your host Katie Jefcoat and I was talking to a friend the other day about how she was feeling pulled in every direction.  No matter what she was doing, she had this enormous sense of guilt, that she wasn’t doing enough.  She was feeling like crap that she left her kids to go to work, a job she loves and finds fulfilling, and she was feeling like crap when she was at home and constantly checking email - just in case something came in.  

 

What we discovered was the root cause of her guilt was focusing on where she was not.  Her head was full of guilt for the place her body was not.  Her focus was off and she couldn’t shake it.  Of course she was feeling pulled and completely out of control. 

 

We talked about how, despite the 478 items on her todo list, she needed to get more sleep. I find that it is so much easier to tackle these emotions with a clear head when you are not starved for sleep.  And so many of us moms are getting that dopamine hit by checking the boxes on the todo list at the expense of our sleep.   In my opinion, that’s a mistake.  When you are tired, everything feels harder.  

 

We also beat ourselves up for the 3 of the 35 things we didn’t get done.  We can’t focus on that.  We need to re-frame how we talk to ourselves.  

 

So when I was talking with this friend, we identified her priorities in this season. And it wasn’t like her family never matters, of course they do.  But also, they are not so high that nothing else matters.  That's not realistic.  So we talked about this season.  The harmony between doing and having it all. 

 

What matters to you will be determined by the season you are in.  So that you will be spending time on what matters most to you right now, knowing the season and your priorities will change.   

 

So friend, this is your invitation to take a deep breath, go to sleep early, tomorrow is a new day and we were never meant to be robots, we were not created to do it all and that’s ok.  I’m rooting for you.   

 

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