88. Why We Talk About Women & Men the Way We Do

“When we human beings started using metal, not for technological purposes only like before, but to create weapons that were used by the males of those civilizations, that's when men had to become stronger and more ‘manly’ or ‘aggressive’ to survive. And that's when language changed to praise men for displaying aggressive and dominant behavior,” explains host Alejandra, transformative communication teacher and coach. Today, Alejandra shares why we use different language when speaking about women than when speaking about men through the lens of Riane Eisler’s book, The Chalice and The Blade: Our History, Our Future.

Riane’s book calls out the fact that the history of culture and civilization as we know it has been told by men. In it are accounts of history from the often untold feminine perspective. For example, ancient civilizations before the time of the Greeks were not by nature patriarchal and violent as you may have been taught in school. Mostly these cultures were about males and females creating thriving partnerships and peaceful societies. It all changed when humans began working with metal to create weapons. This change transformed language, started the trend of praising men for being aggressive, and ultimately transformed the relationship between men and women.

To this day, we see the impact language has made on the dynamics between men and women. It may be easy to think civilizations have always been patriarchal, but history shows that this is not the case. Ancient civilizations were quite egalitarian, and their societies were peaceful. It was not until the advent of metal weaponry that language began to favor a patriarchal paradigm.

 

Quotes

• “We tend to interpret our reality, our environment, our world based on our various layers of culture and the paradigms that influence us.” (7:12-7:22 | Alejandra)

• “When women and multidisciplinary teams looked at the same relics, they concluded that these ancient civilizations were about collaboration and creating thriving partnerships in which males and females cooperated in peaceful and egalitarian societies.” (7:45-8:04 | Alejandra)

• “When we human beings started using metal, not for technological purposes only like before, but to create weapons that were used by the males of those civilizations, that's when men had to become stronger and more ‘manly’ or ‘aggressive’ to survive. And that's when language changed to praise men for displaying aggressive and dominant behavior.” (10:36-11:04 | Alejandra)

• “This language changed the relationship between men and women. It changed the structure of human relations into rigid and force based rankings, and of course, we still see the impact today.” (11:39-11:55 | Alejandra)

• “We will not be able to evolve consciously and purposely if we're still speaking a language of war and domination.” (13:37-13:44 | Alejandra) 

• “When we transform our language, we transform our communication. And when we transform our communication, we transform our relationships. And when we transform our relationships, we transform our world.” (14:14-14:27 | Alejandra) 

 

Links

Riane Eisler's website: https://rianeeisler.com/

Center for Partnership Systems: https://centerforpartnership.org/

To join the mailing list, visit: https://www.languagealchemy.com

To ask questions you'd like Alejandra to answer in the podcast, visit: https://www.languagealchemy.com/podcastquestion

To schedule a reduced-rate coaching consultation with Alejandra, visit: https://www.languagealchemy.com

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Podcast Music composed by Gary Lapow: open.spotify.com/artist/1HlMhcNfKIELxYil5mVqDI

Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm