How do we support others when they struggle to communicate their needs? In this final episode of her five-part series “Communicating Needs Skillfully,” Alejandra Siroka focuses on empowering individuals to help others, including children and adults, express their needs clearly, directly, and confidently.
Alejandra emphasizes the importance of teaching children to connect with and communicate their needs. She points out that these skills are fundamental to building a child's sense of self-worth and value. For parents and caregivers, she suggests practical communication tools addressing children’s emotions to their needs and using story characters to normalize discussions about needs in everyday conversations.
Many adults, regardless of gender, face challenges in expressing their needs due to societal conditioning that often discourages direct communication. To help overcome these barriers, Alejandra outlines four helpful strategies: asking open-ended questions that encourage expression of needs, paying attention to body language and tone of voice, affirming the importance of their needs, and celebrating their successes in expressing needs.
By sharing transformative communication tools, Alejandra encourages listeners to have patience and persistence in supporting others as they learn to communicate their needs more openly.
Quotes
• “When you are in relationships with others who can't communicate their needs openly, freely, and directly to you, that may be because they've been discouraged to communicate their needs, or because they don't feel safe with you, or they don't know how to relax with you and they don't fully trust that you are going to listen to their needs. This impacts the quality of your relationships.” (01:56 | Alejandra Siroka)
• “If you have little ones, you need to be not only aware, but also intentional about teaching them to communicate their needs.” (03:47 | Alejandra Siroka)
• “When you teach children how to connect to and communicate their needs out loud, you are also teaching them that they're valuable and that they matter.” (06:58 | Alejandra Siroka)
• “A loving thing you can do consistently is to be explicit in telling them that their needs matter to you, that their needs are important.” (11:01 | Alejandra Siroka)
• “Be patient with others when they don't know how to communicate their needs directly, clearly, or confidently. And if you've had some success with someone and they were able to communicate a couple of needs to you, that doesn't mean that expressing their needs will be easy from now on. This takes time.” (13:00 | Alejandra Siroka)
Links
To work with Alejandra, visit: www.languagealchemy.com/workwithme
To join the Language Alchemy mailing list, visit: https://www.languagealchemy.com
To ask questions you'd like Alejandra to answer in the podcast, visit: https://www.languagealchemy.com/podcastquestion
To find out about 1:1 transformative communication coaching with Alejandra, visit: https://www.languagealchemy.com/oneonone
To find out about couple transformative communication coaching with Alejandra, visit: https://www.languagealchemy.com/couples
To schedule a reduced-rate coaching consultation with Alejandra, visit: https://www.languagealchemy.com/newclient
To follow Alejandra on instagram follow @languagealchemy
Podcast Music composed by Gary Lapow: open.spotify.com/artist/1HlMhcNfKIELxYil5mVqD
Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm
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