The Compassion Gap: Why we can’t let go of our parental expectations though we can support parent friends (Mom Guilt | Dad Guilt) | Episode 17

Are you struggling with mom guilt or dad guilt and finding it hard to be kind to yourself even though you are kind to other parent friends?

In this episode, I dive deep into:

 

🔹 The roots of parental guilt and why it persists

🔹 How societal expectations shape our self-image

🔹 The powerful role of the inner critic and how it formed

🔹 Practical steps to embrace self-compassion

🔹 The journey of reparenting and inner child healing

 

Tune in to uncover the profound impact of self-compassion on your parenting journey and learn how to healthily lower the volume of your inner critic.

Your children deserve the best version of you, and so do you!

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Resources and Links Mentioned

> FREE Self-Connect Calendar|
> FREE Guide: Calm Parent Calm Child
> (Re)Discover Your Identity in Motherhood [waitlist]
> Get in touch with me (Instagram; website; e-mail)
> Leave a Podcast Review HERE 😀
> FREE Motherhood Coaching Session: Send an e-mail to info@markellakaplani.com with the subject line “Podcast Guesting”
> Join our community on Facebook: Parenthood and Relationship Group

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JOURNALING EXERCISE:

Write a letter to your inner critic and express your gratitude for the fact that it had to play this harsh role in order to make sure that you are well off, that you are accepted, that you're part of the tribe, that you survive.

 

And then in a second paragraph, tell your inner critic that you forgive them for having to be this harsh with you, for using this strategy in order to get through to you, even though it was very painful.

 

And then recognize how painful it may have been for your inner critic to have to take on this role and end the letter with the main theme being that your inner critic can let go of this role now; that they can be who they want to be, that they can contribute to your well being in a different manner because they no longer have to protect you in this way. 

 

Let them know that you are stepping up as the healthy adult to reparent and protect your inner child and that your inner critic doesn't have to step in. Reassure it that you're there. Explain how you're going to do things differently and welcome the inner critic in your life in a different capacity this time. 

 

Now this is a profound exercise and it is very, very impactful, but you're not going to see results overnight. So take it one step at a time. Start noticing the little things that your inner critic is able to let go of. Note them down, and continue journaling. And in time, as you keep at this, you're going to see how your inner critic's voice will gradually lower and lower.
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Find the full transcript HERE.

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Markella Kaplani, M.A.
Clinical-Counseling Psychologist
Parenthood & Relationship Coach
Matrescence Coach, Facilitator, & Activist
www.markellakaplani.com