Ride the Bullsh*t Train with God Hates Unicorns

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Josh H. Unicorn formally of Debutante and and Skull Death Gut Corpse on Lead vocals and some programming.
Jeff (the Snowman) Unicorn on Bass guitar.
Nick J Unicorn formally of Pretty and the River Rats on guitar and additional programming.

God Hates Unicorns formed in 2015..or maybe 2014. I don't remember.I got an invite from Josh to go see their show. I knew of Josh from his earlier bands Skull Death Gut Corpse and Debutante. Josh and I traded shows with each other during the Pittsburgh music scene golden age (the early 2000's when everyone was on Myspace.com the greatest tool for musicians to ever have existed).
I remember seeing their very first "performance" at the Squirrel Hill Sports bar. It was a bit cold that night maybe early Spring or late Fall. The band was a classic 3 piece. By classic 3 piece band I mean a singer, a bass player, and some one on stage only to press play on a drum machine. The tracks were created on Josh's familiar Roland 505 (the same one he used to make tracks for Debutante). The tracks sounded pretty good from where I was sitting. If you like depressing dark wave dance tracks then what's not to love here? The songs had enough thumping kick drums and melodic keyboard sounds to pass most peoples standards for a song on there own. Unfortunately, something about the sound that night was off to the band as Joshua operating as the lead singer wondered on and off the stage seeming to try to find an area of the room where he could hear the track properly. Leaving the rest of the band that remained on stage looking confused and frightened as Josh careened through the crowd and then back to the stage again screaming into a bullhorn; finally he stopped on the stage for the last time and laid down in defeat. The bands first outing did not appear to be going well. They played about 3 songs from what I recall and none of them correctly based on the displeased expressions from the band members.

After the show I jokingly asked Josh if he still wanted me to join the band (he asked a few months earlier) and he said yes. He said they could use a guitar player. I told him I didn't currently own an electric guitar only an acoustic-electric. Then he said I could use the electric guitar that a previous musician left in his basement. I asked him what kind of guitar it was and he said it was a Fender Stratcaster. That was enough to get me into the idea of joining a band even though I didn't really feel like joining a band at the time. That and Josh made it sound like we would only play paying gigs and get fucking rich! BABY!
Anyway I'm still in the band today and I'm being held against my will,come save me!

-Nick J Unicorn