Love University with Dr. Alexander Avila
Society & Culture
THE NEW GUY'S GUY: HOW MEN ARE CHANGING THEIR ATTITUDES ABOUT DATING, SEX, AND LOVE, WITH SPECIAL GUEST ROBERT MANNI, TOP DATING PODCASTER AND THE MALE'S SUCCESSOR TO "SEX AND THE CITY"
Have you ever wondered what guys are thinking when it comes to dating, sex, and relationships? If you’re a guy, have you ever wondered what women were thinking when it came to romance and relationships? With so much confusion and discord between the sexes today, we need to find a point of harmony and balance in the search for true, lasting love. Now we have some insightful and important answers from our guest on Love University, Robert Manni, top dating podcaster and the male’s successor to “Sex and the City.” Here are some of the nuggets of dating/love wisdom we learned from Robert:
The Guy’s Guy: the New Male standard. According to Robert, the ideal male for our new generation is the Guy’s Guy. He has a complementary blend of traits including casual confidence, unassuming strength, seductive integrity, and timeless style. He also highly respects women (and himself), and he has emotional intelligence—he knows how to manage his feelings and relate to the feelings of others. The Guy’s Guy is a strong man—he’s not a wimp—but he is also sensitive and empathetic to the concerns of women. He is a fun guy that both men and women like and want to be around.
How to be a Successful Single Guy’s Guy. Robert instructs men on how to succeed in the competitive singles dating world. He tells men to pay attention to the woman (her preferences), practice dating etiquette (tip well, don’t drink too much, don’t overtalk), be a gentleman (open doors if she prefers it; text to make sure she got home safely; respect her sexual boundaries). Also, if you find yourself in the “friend zone,” be patient. Over time, she may find you more attractive and a romantic relationship can ensue. If not, you can always benefit from having a friend. However, you also need to realize when it’s time to move on romantically—don’t keep investing your emotional and romantic energy in someone who is not interested in you. Love yourself and find someone who loves you in the same way.
How to be a Successful Married Guy’s Guy. Before tying the knot, the Guy’s Guy needs to ask several important questions: 1. Am I ready to commit? 2. What do I visualize in my future with this person—can I fulfill their expectations as well as my own by being together? Do they make me laugh? Are we compatible in the areas of values, children, sex, money, politics, and religion/spirituality? Do I want to grow old with them—remembering that looks fade, but inner beauty lasts forever. Robert shares that he was happily single for many years living in New York City. One day, he was with his Italian family, and they asked him for the umpteenth time, “Robert, when are you going to get married?” On this occasion, he said, “Next year.” They asked him, “Who is it?” He replied “No one yet.” However, within the year he was engaged and married to his lovely wife. The secret: He had decided to “Make room in my heart for someone special in my life.” Once he made that mental commitment to find lasting love and get married, he created an open space for that beautiful person who became his wife to appear in his life.
According to Robert, the new Guy’s Guy can be male or female. Regardless of gender the Guy’s Guy is a quality person who is confident, kind, respectful, fun, and loving. The key to being a true Guy’s Guy is to love yourself, others, and a higher nature, without expectation. With this mindset, you won’t expect anything in return when you love because you already have loving energy inside you. You can give as much loving energy as you want because you have more love where that came from. In a practical way, strive every day to extend your loving energy outwardly to others and the Universe. Smile at others, be kind and helpful, listen attentively and empathetically. As you become a more loving person, you will find yourself attracting the love you desire, and you will eventually meet the soul mate of your dreams.
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