EP 26 Is Balance for Busy Working Moms Really Even Possible? The ONE GREAT IDEA That Could Change Your Life! Intentional Life Coach Private Coaching Session

EP 26 Is Balance for Busy Working Moms Really Even Possible? The ONE GREAT IDEA That Could Change Your Life! Intentional Life Coach Private Coaching Session

What is balance? What does that even mean? Because as you know, you know, as we work full time, as we are moms, wives, we are working in our church. We are serving and volunteering. We are the sports soccer mom. We are classroom mom. We are homeschooling kids, all of these different hats that we wear, how in the world do we create this balance? Every woman deserves to live her life, feeling fulfilled in every area of her life. Girl, Let’s walk this thing out together, you deserve your Wholly Made Life™!

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Welcome back to this episode of Wholly Made Life™. How are you today? I am good. Thank you. Sometimes I wish there was a feedback where we could actually be talking so, but did you know that we can do that? We can talk. We can connect in real life. If you go over to my Facebook group, Holy made life and we can comment. We can play. We can hang out over there. So make sure if you haven't already go ahead and request to get into the Holy made life, private Facebook group, and it's free. There's nothing you need to do other than just go request it on Facebook. So Holy made life W H O L L Y made life™ just like the podcast. Okay. So today I want to talk about an interview that I just did with the host of nurses on fire Naseema.

And I was really excited to do this with her. She is fantastic. Is a matter of fact, I'm going to have her as a guest on this podcast because she has an incredible story about how she has paid off. I think up to a million dollars in debt, don't quote me on that, but I'm pretty sure her story includes that, but I know she paid off a ton of debt. She is a labor and delivery nurse working full time. She's got two kiddos. She's amazing. So she just wrote a book called smart money, the step-by-step personal finance plan to crush debt. And I binge read this, I got it on Kindle and I've been dreaded so you can get it on Amazon for your Kendall. And she has a hard copy too. I think it might still be on pre-order it's so new, but anyway, she goes through a nine step plan on how to get your finances back in order.

And I know some of you guys who have taken that Wholly Made Life short assessment. If you haven't already, you can click the link to take your short assessment in the show notes on the episode page. So go ahead and do that if you haven't. But some of those scores that I am seeing are related to feeling a little bit unbalanced for your finances. So this book is really helpful with that. It tells her story about how she paid off a ton of debt while working full time. And so it's really valuable. But what I was going to say is I'm going to have her on the podcast so she can tell you her story and walk through some of these things, these easy steps that you can start to take. And I know in the one episode that I did about finances and what does God say about money?

I talked about doing a savings account and making sure that you guys get to a place where you have a thousand dollars in savings. She recommends that as well. So, and if you haven't heard that episode, go back to the one that says, what does God say about money?

Find it at Episode 18==> What does God say about My Finances?

And it'll tell you a little bit about how you can go ahead and get a thousand dollars saved up in your savings account and how that will kind of free you to deal with any emergencies, things that come up like that. So anyway, I was on her podcast and that episode is going to release on nurses on fire next week on Thursday. And that date is what is that day going to be? That's going to be the 18th of March. So that will, if you want to listen to that, that will be up on her podcast and nurses on fire.

She's got a lot of great tips over there. So they feature all nurses. And of course you guys know I'm a nurse, she's a nurse. And so that's her specialty is she, she just showcases nurses with different stories and in different areas of your life. So it's a great podcast, whether you're a nurse or not. What I wanted to talk about today though, was she asked me a lot of questions about my coaching and my coaching program and what I'm providing and what I'm helping ladies with. And so the number one question she was asking was, okay, you talk about balance in your life. What is balance? What does that even mean? Because as you know, you know, as we work full time, as we are moms, wives, we are working in our church. We are serving and volunteering. We are the sports soccer mom.

We are classroom mom. We are homeschooling kids, all of these different hats that we wear, how in the world do we create this balance? And so what I explained was it's such an individualized thing because the real reality is, is that balance is going to look different for each person. And it's not what the society says. That balance is. It's not this perfect little pie where you have a full piece of pie and in every area of your life, it's not this perfect thing. It's going to ebb and flow depending upon the seasons of your life. And thankfully we're graced for the times where it's ebbing and flowing a little higher or lower in some of those areas of our life, where we're having to spend more time in our marriage or more time at work or more time because we're getting a business off the ground or more time because one of our kids is going through something.

So it's always going to ebb and flow. There's never, you're never going to have a perfect wheel. That's perfectly circular and full in every area of your life. All the time. The goal is, is to define what balance looks like for you based on your desires, based on what fills you up, based on the impact that has on your family and your job and your coworkers and your friends, and figuring out what that is, and then work within that definition of what balance is for you. So it's very individualized. So that's the first thing we do is I talk about the reality and get us out of this hole. We have to be perfectly balanced in every area of our life, all the time to be successful, because that's just a lie. You are successful already. You are already equipped with everything that you need to wear.

All the hats that you're being asked to wear. Sometimes it's related to your boundaries. And you've said yes, to too many things. And some of that gets identified when we talk about the reality and the definition of what balance is for you and what, where you need to be. Okay. So the second thing that I do once we have some of that defined for that person is we come up with an idea and that is an acronym for some of the steps that I use with my clients, an idea I D E a idea. So let me tell you quickly about what this acronym idea means. So the I in idea means to identify, we are going to identify what it is that is going on in your life, in all areas of your life, because the reality is until we even identify what that thing is, that's making you feel either uncomfortable or burnt out or stressed out or overwhelmed, or just in a place of restlessness or a place where you're not finding joy in either one or many areas of your life.

We have to identify that in the first place. A lot of you guys come to me and talk about where you are and not really understanding or knowing why you're feeling the way you're feeling, you're just feeling met, or you're just feeling blocked. You know, you're wearing that emoji that, that met emoji, and you're just walking through life every day. And it's kind of on repeat, but you're not really intentionally going after the things that make you feel filled up or spark that joy for you. So sometimes it's just a, not even realizing what it is that's causing these feelings in you, or not even realizing that, you know what, I don't remember the last time that I laughed or the last time that I found some joy in something and really thinking about, did I find any joy in anything that I did today?

And so it's just that honing in on that identification of that, there is something going on, we just need to figure out what it is. So we're going to identify the issue, the feeling, the emotion, the circumstance, the thoughts around those circumstances. We're going to identify that there's something that needs to change in the first place. So the second step is to define this is the D we're going to define what it would look like to spark that joy again, to put laughter back into your life, to feel balanced. What is it that balance is we're going to define the balance and we're going to identify what it is going on in each of those pieces of the pie and what, what it looks like to feel that joy again, to feel fulfilled in those areas. What does that look like? You don't know if you're winning in something you don't know.

If you are meeting a goal in something, unless it's defined. Sometimes we have this big, huge, audacious thought of what each area of your life should look like in your spiritual, your physical, your relational, et cetera. But we don't really know what that means for you. You know, you're, we're just going by what society says that we should look like, feel like be doing in each of these areas of our life, but you haven't really defined those areas. Well, what would make you happy in those areas? What would make you feel joyful and fulfilled? What would make your kids and your husband and your friends and your coworkers feel fulfilled in these areas? What is, what is it? You have to define it. You got to know what you're going after in order to get there. You can't just get in your car and say, I'm going to go to Hawaii and not have a plan and just start driving.

Because at that point, if you don't ever reference a goal, a direction, a plan, you won't get there. You've got to have a definition of where it's going. And you know, actually in the define stage, you don't even know that you're going Hawaii. You just know you're getting in your car and driving, but where are you going? I mean, none of us do that, right? We don't get in our car and just start driving around, not knowing where we're going. Unless that's something that fills you up to just go take a drive and be by yourself. Now that's a different situation. Okay. But in as far as destination and getting to a goal, you got to know when you get into your car where you're going to go so that you know how to get there. Okay. So that's the second step define the third step is going to be embrace E M B R a C E embrace.

Cause we got to do two things here. We've got to embrace what it is that we individually are defining as what would feel successful for us and be okay with that. Despite what other people are saying, despite what other people are defining for us, we have to define that ourselves and embrace that we have to be ready and fully ready to accept what it is that we define as success. Okay. You know what, in the mornings, if I get my kids to school on time, that's a success to me. It doesn't really matter. Everything in between the end goal is did they get to school on time? Were they dressed? You know, where are they fed? Do they have what they need? Did they get their backpacks? I mean, this morning I got not halfway, maybe a third way to school. And my youngest is like, Oh my gosh, we only have one shoe.

And I was like, you've got to be kidding me. Okay. So I was in a frenzy like, Oh my gosh, we got to turn around. And I'm like, how in the world you get in the car with no shoe on. And my other one, my middle one, Elijah was like, Oh yeah, I saw that ball at the car. And I was like, Oh, what in the world? How do you see this shoe fall out of the car? And you don't say anything and tell him, Hey, get your shoe. It just fell out of the car. He was like, I don't know. I was on the, on my phone with my dad. I'm just like, and then I forgot. And I was like, Oh my gosh. So, you know, had I defined success in, you know, did I make sure my kid, my 11 year old, my fifth grader had his boat issue on.

Then I'd be like, okay, I totally bonded today as a parent, I bombed, but I got them to school on time still. So despite the fact we had to turn around, come back and get the shoe, which was on the garage floor. And get turned back around and get them to school. They both made it on time and nobody was harmed. Okay. So that was a success. Okay. So it's important how you define those things and you know what? I have to embrace it. It just is what it is. Stuff happens. Life happens and it doesn't make me a bad parent. It doesn't make him a bad kid. We got to school on time. Everybody had their shoes on. Everybody had what they needed. They had their backpacks, they have their masks and it's all good. Okay. So we're going to embrace our definition of what success is.

Okay. And we're going to work on that because that may be, especially for a recovering perfectionist, like myself, that would have been something I would have beat myself up about, but you're like, Oh my gosh, I can't do anything. Right. I can't even make sure my kid has two shoes before we get in the car. Like, I'm horrible. I'm a failure as a mom. That's where that would have gone to in the past. But at this point, no, I'm not going to define it that way. I'm going to embrace that. Life's going to happen. Things aren't going to be perfect. They're not going to go exactly. As we thought, I didn't plan on turning around this morning and getting back, but we did it and we made it and everybody's living and we're all good. Okay. So we're going to embrace what it is that we define it.

And we're going to continually work on our mindset and our thoughts and our feelings that come around that what our definitions have been so that we don't end up beating ourselves up when things don't happen exactly as they are. And when they don't measure up to that whole perfectionist expectation. Okay. Cause that's not real. All right, we're going to break that. And there, we're going to embrace that action plan, that, that goal that we build for ourselves to get us to where we are and we're going to embrace that life happens. And sometimes we're going to meet it and sometimes we're not. Okay. So we're going to do a lot of mindset work during this embrace stage. The final letter in this acronym is a, and this is going to be to activate. This means that we're going to take action. We're going to move into action.

So we're going to come up with a plan of action, small steps that are attainable and manageable. When you look at them, you say, yes, I can do that today. We're going to look at one step at a time, one small action at a time because we know that all the small things that we do on a daily basis build up to bigger things. Your small action steps you take every day, we'll come to bigger things, bigger accomplishments. They, everything adds up. It's like compounded interest. Okay. You take little steps today. And it gets the same little step tomorrow will compound on the little steps we took yesterday. That's where we get results. And by the way, it's opposite to, in a negative way, the little steps we don't take today can add up to bigger things tomorrow. So it's kinda like, I think about when you are trying to eat healthier and you choose to eat a piece of cake, which by the way I do.

Okay. I am not the epitome of an example of physical health at this point or not health, but physical small steps. So, you know, there's some times I choose not to do the workout. There's sometimes I choose not to order the baked fish instead of the fish and chips, like right now on Fridays, those kinds of things. So there are some things that happen, but if I make those choices every single day, then my bigger outcome down the road will show that my body will not be as strong, not be as spit, not be as toned. I will gain weight. So it's not about one small step you didn't take and you beat yourself up. So then you say, okay, well, I chose that. So now I'm going to choose the ice cream and the chips and everything else. Okay. It's about the consistent small actions we're taking and not letting one small decision we make or small action we do, or don't take ruin the rest of our little decisions.

All right. So I don't want you to beat yourself up on that, but so it's about consistency. It's about taking small actions and understanding that these small actions will result in bigger things and you have to just be accountable to whatever that bigger thing is. If I don't like the way I look in the mirror, I don't like the way my pants are fitting. Then I have to start taking smaller actions. It's not about anything else other than me and my action plan. Okay. All right. So in the activate stage, again, small action plans, or I'm sorry, a plan to take small action steps every single day that are attainable, you can feel good about and an understanding that your big results are going to come in the future. They're not going to come today, but today you can embrace what your plan is. You can embrace the, the mindset that you can decide, how you feel about the action steps you've taken today.

And if you don't feel good about it, then you take different action steps tomorrow or later today. Okay. Just cause you take, don't do what you wanted to do an hour ago doesn't mean that you can't make good choices and good on your action plan to right now. Okay. So identify, define, embrace, and activate. That is how we work in the coaching program individually to come up with a way that you can feel good about getting yourself to where you feel more balanced. Okay. All right. Any questions about that? Please email me at Angie, tonyRogers@gmail.com. I will be accepting private clients. And if you have questions about the coaching menu, a half-hour session, our session, and I will email you back and we'll discuss what you're looking for and whether or not it's a good fit for us to work together. Okay. All right, guys, thank you so much.

And again, don't forget to tune in to the Thursday episode next week on the 18th on nurses on fire to hear the interview that I did with miss Nisima and I we'll have her on our podcast here in the near future to talk specifically about how she was able to pay off a ton of debt. Okay. She's got a great action plan that I think it's simple for any of us to follow, especially when we're talking and breaking it down into little action steps. The other big announcement that I have is that I am so, so excited to announce that I am going to be interviewing Ms. Stephanie gas. She has this Stephanie gas show. It was mompreneur mastermind show, but now it is the Stephanie gas show. She just rebranded. This is my personal friend and mentor and coach. She has actually helped me with all things podcasting.

The whole reason why I even have the title that I do was that I had personal coaching sessions with her. She helped me with all of my jumbled ideas that I had and she helped me hone it in. And we prayed about it. She is a Christian coach and she prays with her clients. It's amazing. Really? So anyway, I am going to have her on a podcast episode because she is going to talk with us about how to balance our professional piece of the pie. She's amazing. She's done amazing work. And if you haven't already looked at or listened to her show, it's the Stephanie gas show. G a S S take a listen, but she is going to be a special guest. I'm interviewing her next week. So it should drop an episode with her interview in the next couple of weeks. Okay. So I'm really excited about that. I also have some other exciting guests that I am booking to interview. So I'm going to have some great things for you guys coming up. I'm really excited about it and I hope you guys are too. All right, guys, don't forget. Hit me up on the Facebook group. Get in that Facebook group so that we can live this thing out together. Okay. All right, girls, I love you guys. And we will see you on the next episode.

Hey, before you go, I'd love for you to hop over to my podcast and give me a review. And you know, I'd love five stars. That's how we can share this thing with other women, just like us. You're five stars and written review really helps me get the word out. You can also take a screenshot of this episode and tag me in your Insta and Facebook stories. And I'll give you a shout out right back, leaving a review and sharing this episode is the best way you can show me some luck. Thanks so much. And I'll see him the next episode. And remember your smile is like a boomerang, throw one at somebody and it'll come right back.