🍿 “Snacks ate everything” — Kellogg’s disowns cereal. Chanel’s V-VIP store. Instagram’s TikTok zucking.
🌴 “Welcome to Amazon Resort” — Amazon’s luxe influencers. The Warriors’ software championship. Elon’s tweet-and-greet.
🔺🔴🟥 “Squid Game… but it’s real” – Netflix’s reality show. LEGO’s US factory. Jokr’s Millennial lifestyle.
⚽ “Going full Ted Lasso” — Apple’s $2.5B soccer deal. Miso’s robot army. The Fed’s huge punishment.
🥗 “Ronald slaughtered his salads” — McDonald’s people pleasing. NextDoor’s new neighbor. Florida’s “Real Zero” trademark.
🧠 “A robot that feels” — Google’s human-ish chatbot. Jack & Coke’s perfect fit. Celsius’ bad crypto apple.
✏️ “Mr. Beyonce taught me Bitcoin” — Jay Z’s Crypto Academy. Spotify’s podcasting double-dip. Permian Basin’s whispering oil.
⛳ “Unhappy Gilmore” — Golf’s Saudi sportswashing. Jones Road’s micro makeup. Waymo’s truck brains.
🌮 “It’s got a taco elevator” — Taco Bell’s drive-thru supreme. Summer’s housing test-drive. Shopify’s new king.
🍬 “Fruity Pebbles Latte, please” — Nestle’s coffee creamer-copia. Palantir’s perfect pitch. Target’s fire sale.
🍷 “Rando Merlot vs Pricey Pinot” — Duckhorn’s Millennial wine thesis. Apple’s chicken/egg iMessage. Solar stocks’ dodgeball.
🍄🍌 “I drive a Mario Kart” — Nintendo’s magic kingdom. Poparazzi’s anti-Instagram. Jamie Dimon’s hurricane.
⛈ “It will rain at 3:18pm… in 1 year” - Salient’s super weather app. HP’s perfect conference room. Sheryl’s automation complication.
⛹️♂️ “Gucci, Prada, Lebron” — The NBA’s luxury love. Elon’s anti-remote rant. Delta’s summer upgrade.
👨🎤👨🎤👨🎤 “A Jonas Bro texted me nbd” — Jonas Brothers’ superfan startup. Top Gun’s popcorn payoff. Roomba’s brain strategy.
🔌 “How’s the battery range?” — Our electric car odyssey. Burger King’s worship brand. Baby Unicorns’ warning letter.
🕺 “Bringing Unsexy Back” — Justin Timberlake’s $100M music. Petco’s PUPPY. The NFL’s Football+
👚 “Moms popping collars” — Abercrombie’s nostalgia fire. Amazon’s Airbnb move. Glencore’s bribe rooms.
👑 “Kim Kardashian’s cool table” — Snapchat’s 40% ghosting. Beyond Meat’s Kim-bassador. Walmart’s drone championship.
🤪 “Billion-Dollar Bobblehead Dolls” — Funko’s bobblehead unicorn. Boston Beer’s weed teapot. Buy Now Pay Later’s disguise.
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